


Wish You Would

by Misti1987



Series: Wish You Would [1]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: 10 years forward, Anger, Angst, Bi-Polar, Broken, F/M, Future, Hate, Love, M/M, Post 6x01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-25
Updated: 2016-10-10
Packaged: 2018-05-23 03:44:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 48,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6103723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misti1987/pseuds/Misti1987
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After 10 years the boys meet again, when avoiding each other obviously isn't happening, can they deal with their past. Nothing is the same, or is it?  </p><p>Mandy is scared Ian is going to go off the deep end again, but what exactly does that mean?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What Happened?

Chapter one:

Mickey watched his sister rushes around. Her mind obviously everywhere but on him. “Shit, chill. We still going to lunch or what?” He asked looking at her. He had been out of prison for a few weeks and had been trying to feel some sort of normalcy, but it was hard when he was trying like hell to avoid his sisters best friend.

“Yeah,yeah, I just gotta stop by the diner and get Ian's prescription.” She stated in a rush.

“I am not going there, you know I don't want to run into him.” He grunted at her.

“Whatever, stay outside then. He's almost out, has to be done today, there is no way I'm letting my roommate and best friend go all bat shit crazy just because you don't want to see him, it was hell last time.” She stated walking out.

“Last time?” He asked warily.

“Don't worry about it, let's go.” She said.

He stayed outside in the car eyeing the door, half expecting the redhead to come bounding out, he knew Mandy would tell him, big mouthed bitch. Instead what he saw was Mandy run out, Fiona following her. “Why are you freaking out Mandy? I told you, he said he's having an off day. New meds and all that.” Mandy shook her head.

“Shit, shit, shit, he's not on new meds Fiona. He's hiding out. Fuck! I'll go fill this. I'll call you as soon as I see him.” She said running towards the car. Fiona looked into the car. “Mandy, you are not taking him over there. He’ll freak out. Does he even know he's out.” Mandy nodded.

“Oh he knows. I have to go.” She got into the car and looked at Mickey.

“The fuck is going on Mandy?” He asked as she drove off in the direction of a place he swore he would never be. “You can stay in the car if you want. I'm filling this, then I'm going home and making sure Ian is still alive, if he is, I'm going to fucking kill him.” She screamed. His sister was freaking out.

“Okay, okay. Fill the damn meds, we'll check on your boyfriend. Geez.” He said sighing. He could tell there was no other way around this. That look on her face meant she thought Ian was off his meds, she was terrified. Shit, what did Gallagher do last time he went off his meds. She never would tell him, she mentioned it once during a visit a few years back but would never talk about it. Not like he had asked much, he liked to keep the focus of their relationship off of his ex.

Mandy had spend the time waiting for the meds trying to get ahold of Ian who was not answering. Bad sign. According to Mandy, he always answered. He was starting to freak out a little himself. Sure, he hated even the slightest thought of Ian Gallagher, the dude could take a fucking leap for all he cares, but that didn't mean he wanted the guy to go all crazy and shit.

Finally they arrived and Mandy ran for her apartment. Mickey slowly followed her, not really wanting to enter the apartment. His real hope was that before he actuallly got there, she would run out and say that Ian was fine and he turn back around and not even deal with this shit right now. He'd never missed prison so much than right now. In prison, there was no chance of having to deal with the man that broke his heart. He arrived at the door and breathed before slightly opening it. Mandy was screaming. "IAN, Get your fucking ass up. NOW!!" He heard nothing from inside the room except a loud bang. He waited another second before heading towards the room. he stopped when he heard the voice coming from the hallway and not the bedroom. "geezus fuck Mandy, what is your problem?" he yelled and then he came into sight. There Ian stood, in barely a towel, Damn. He looked even better than he did back then. All toned and perfect. Mickey shook his head, Ian hadn't seen him yet, he was fine, he started to back out of the apartment slowly when Ian looked over.

"Mickey?" he choked out.

"MANDY?!" was all Mickey yelled when she bounded out of the room flying at Ian. She looked into his eyes and he looked back at her confused. Ian looked over at Mickey again.

"What the fuck did you give her?" Ian accused. Mickey was pissed, was that fucker actually saying that he drugged his sister. Fucking douche.

"Look at me Ian, are you okay? how many doses did you miss? I thought you said you werent out until tonight?" She kept asking questions which caused Ian to roll his eyes.

"That's what this is? Seriously?" he asked, turning to Mickey, since his sister was oviously still rambling off things for Ian to answer. Mickey shrugged.

"She's been like this since she talked to Fiona." he said simply. Ian sighed loudly and then grabbed both sides of Mandy's face.

"MANDY! HEY! Snap out of it. I'm fine, Look, I got out of bed, I showered, I still have 2 doses of the bipolar meds left. Wanna see? Hey Mick, can you throw me the bottles on the table behind you?" he asked turning slightly and Mickey did. "Look Mandy, see, not out, Still here, Im okay." She finally breathed and started crying.

"Fucks sake Gallagher, What the fuck did you do?" Mickey asked. It was obvious whatever had happened the last time Ian went off his meds was fucked up, why else would she be freaking out this bad.

"What?" Ian asked eyeing his ex.

"Never fucking Mind. Look Mandy, he's fine see. You good now?" he asked and she nodded. Then she punched Ian in the side of the face. Mickey laughed.

"You asshole, you scared the shit out of me. Fiona said your prescription was due last week, not today and then she said you called and cancelled some shit, because you had been having an off day. Then you didnt answer my fucking phone calls." she punched him again.

"Fuck Mands, Chill. The perscription is due early for a reason, so that there is time to get it, Fiona is a nut and wanted me to go on some fucking blind date with some tard she met, somewhere or another, thinks i need to get laid or some shit. I made up an excuse, shit, this bi-polar shit has to have some advantage, why not get me out of a date." he laughed.

Mandy seemed to calm down. "Who she trying to set you up with?" she asked. Mickey suddenly had to get out of there. He did not want to hear about anything concerning Ian, now that he was sure the asshole was fine and not on some kind of Bi-polar episode, he didnt give a shit to hear any of it. "not important, what is important, is that I do just fine on my own and I don't need my big sister setting me up on a date. Now that you know I'm fine, didn't you two have lunch plans?" he asked. Thank fuck for that. She seemed to remember and looked back at Mickey appologetically. "Yeah, yeah, lets go." she smiled back at her brother. "Ian, you hungry? You could come too?" Mandy asked.

Mickey stared at his sister in awe, reallly? She knew how much he didn't want to be around Ian, he had made that clear, from the second she told him who she was rooming with, that under no circumstances was he to be anywhere near Ian, and now not only had she dragged him over here in her crusade to save her manic best friend, but now she wanted them to all go out and eat together, like fucking seriously? Ians eyes shifted around the room. "Umm, Nah, already ate, You two have fun. Good to see you Mickey." he said looking over.

"Yup, you too, glad you didn't go bat shit crazy and shit." he said walking out the door without looking back to see the look of hurt on Ian's face.

\--------------------

Ian looked up from the couch when Mandy walked back into the apartment later that day. She looked worn down and exhausted, he should have left it alone and went in his room leaving her be but he couldn't. "What the fuck Mandy, Why did you bring him here?" he asked her before she had even gotten settled.

"I was fucking scared okay?"she shot back.

"And if I had been in the state you thought, what then. I never want him to see me like that, you know that. How much does he know?" he asked. She shook her head.

"He doesn't. He knows you went off your meds a few years ago, he didn't ask much about it and I didn't offer the information." He nodded.

"God Mandy, I'm sorry I scared you, but bringing him here. I can't handle that shit right now. He can never know okay?" she nodded at him.

Later that night Mandy sat on the couch next to Ian and kept looking at him. "what?" he asked her.

"Nothing. I'm going out tonight. Wanna come?" she asked. He sighed. he wanted to say no, but he knew how she got when she had been like she had today. She wouldn't go if he didn't go with her.

"No Mickey?", he felt the need to ask.

"Oh yeah, because that's totally Mickey's scene. can you imagine? Hey Mickey, want to go out with me tonight and dance the night away?" Ian laughed.

"Point taken. Fine." he said getting up.

\------------------------------

Ian laughed as he and Mandy danced, It was kind of freeing, to feel the music and to just have fun. The best thing about the club, these people didn't know him, they didn't look at him with fear every time he looked sad for just a second too long, it was perfect. It was perfect it was until he saw him. He felt his whole body ran cold, There he was Mickey Milkovich, and not just that he was smiling, he was laughing, he had his arm drapped over some guy, in public, he seemed fucking happy. Not like earlier that day when his cold eyes stared at Ian. Ian could feel the panic rising inside of him, that's what Mickey did to him, the mere thought of the man usually send Ian into a panic attack, at his apartment he had been focused on calming Mandy down, that he hadn't really taken Mickey in, and now here he was staring across the club at his ex, and he had to get out of here.

"Ian, you okay?" Mandy asked suddenly noticing Ian's look of horror.

"Um, yeah fine, just need some fresh air. I have to get out of here, you good?" and answered.

"Umm yeah, I guess, but its our night." he nodded.

"I'll come back in, I promise. Just give me a moment." she nodded, not quite understanding.

 

\----------------

  
Mickey suddenly felt a chill, a bad feeling overtaking him as he saw a flash of red-hair out of the corner of his eyes. No. He turned and saw Ian, talking to Mandy and then bolting. The guy was practically running like someone was chasing him.

"Is that?" he heard Svetlana say from behind him.

"Orange Boy!" she screams.

"Jesus Svet, shut the fuck up!" Mickey snaps at her. She shrugs as Ian turns towards them in horror. Ian seems to freeze looking back and forth towards the door. He waves and blows Svetlana a kiss and heads towards the door.

"Hmm, what you do to Ian?" she asks.

"Ian? You've never called him Ian." he rolls his eyes.

"I do sometimes, he good to us while you away." he looks back to the door.

"Oh for fucks sake, fine, if you stop looking at me like that, I'll check on him. shit." He looks back to Svetlana and the people around her, excusing himself.

"Excuse me, while I go jump head first into bullshit." he says walking off.

\----------------------------

Ian finally made it outside, hyperventaling into the cold air. He finally stands up straight and lights up a cigarette. How was he ever going to deal with this if every time he turned around there Mickey was? He couldn't breathe around him. He had promised Mandy he would come back in, but he didn't see how he could. Inside there was Mickey, happy without him. He stiffened when he heard the sigh behind him. "You okay, gallagher?" He turned abruptly looking him in the eye.

"Like you care, go away." Ian spoke harshly without really meaning to. Afterall it wasn't Mickey's fault that he was unforgettable, that Ian had walked away from the best thing that had ever happened to him, it didn't matter anyway.

"With fucking pleasure, Svet was fucking worried, I'll tell her you said to fuck off." he turned to go. Ian sighed.

"Tell Lana, I'm okay, tell her I'll call her tomorrow." he said defeated.

"You're calling her Lana, She's calling you Ian, A lot changes in ten years." he said more in the distance.

"and yet, some things never do." Ian said walking past him back inside to find Mandy and get the fuck out of there.


	2. Flashes of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How do you get someone you love off your mind, when they keep showing up everywhere you are?

Chapter 2:

Mickey watched from a distance, he didn't mean to be staring at his ex like a stalker, he was just in shock. When he had went to work this morning he hadn't expected to see Ian, especially since his job was a little bit outside of Chicago. Some big developments were going up outside the city and the construction company he was working for had been hired, he had observed the red-head get out a nice looking car, and step out on the sidewalk in a suit. A freaking suit. He looked amazing. Mickey didn't mean to stare, he kept telling himself that but he was curious. Was he going on a date? Ian hadn't turned around to see him, he was focused on the man he was talking to, laughing with. Mickey grunted. Just what he needed, to witness how truly over him Ian was.

 

When Ian turned around to look at the construction behind him, the last thing he expected to see was Mickey, hammering away at something, looking sexier than he had even imagined. He stood looking for a while before he was pulled out of his daze. “Mr. Gallagher.” He heard and snapped his head up.

“Yes sir. Sorry, you wanted to see me?” He asked the man in front of him.

“Yes I did, first how are you, seem a little distracted? See something you like over there? I could…” His boss smirked at him.

“No! I mean no, no I'm fine, thinking about things, absolutely nothing to do with that.” He rambled.

“Sure…okay, just trying to be helpful. Listen Ian, I brought you here because this is my new project and I know you have a lot on your mind, but I'd like you to help me with it, be In charge over here if you will.” He spoke and Ian's mouth dropped.

“Sir, don't you usually give jobs like that to your project managers, not well, not me.” He said stuttering.

“I am giving it to my project manager, my newest one.” Ian looked at him.

“Seriously?” He asked. The man nodded and pulled Ian into a hug laughing.

 

Mickey thought he was going to be sick, the man was twice Ian's age, then again, always had a thing for those types. “Staring at the boss won't get you any favors Mick.” His co-worker laughed from beside him.

“That guy?” He asked grunting. Great, Ian's sugardaddy, was his fucking boss.

“Yup, both of them actually.” Mickey whipped his head up.

“What? What are they married or some shit?” He had sworn that Ian had said something about being single, or was it that he just didn't need to be set up. The guy behind him laughed.

“Oh man that was good. What you care for anyway?” Mickey shrugged.

“Don't.” The guy laughed again.

“Hey boss! You and Gallagher in love now?” The man yelled out laughing. Mickeys face turned pale, refusing to look up at Ian.

“Yeah you know, the wife said I needed to find a new hobby, I figured, what the hell, a gay love affair with a boy younger than my son, was perfect.” The older man laughed and smacked the other guy on the back of the head. 

“What? Inquiring minds wanted to know?” He held up his hands laughing. Ian raised his eyebrows, and smirked.

“Boys, gather around.” The man called out. “Alright, most of you that have worked with Galway construction for a while, have worked with myself before and of course, I believe a great majority have worked with Mr. Gallagher here. That being said, this man right here will be heading this team. He will be project manager. If you need anything or such, Ian here will be around, to take care of anything you need.” Mickey sighed. Great, not only was Ian aware that he had asked about him, now Ian was his fucking boss?

Ian laughed with a few of the guys before heading back up to the office on site. He had to get away from Mickey, who was actively avoiding looking at him. Had he really asked about him and Mr. Greene. Jared had seemed to imply so, which was oddly entertaining. He didn't know exactly how to feel about that. He didn't want to care that Mickey obviously got the wrong idea when he spotted him with the older man, he couldn't exactly fault him for that, there was a time when he did go after a few much older men, but why did he care? He had made his feelings for Ian perfectly clear, many years ago. Sitting in that jail telling Ian what a piece of shit low life he was. The conversation from eight years ago was still burned into his brain. He would never forget it. Not that he had disagreed, he had fully understood it, he had been a low life, asshole, all of the things Mickey had said he was, Disease or not, when Mickey had first been locked up, he was all of the things that Mickey accused him of, that didn’t mean it hurt any less, it didn’t mean those words didn’t echo in his head all of the time, in fact the exact words, _I hate you, I never loved you, I never want to see you again._ Had echoed in his brain over and over again, some of his most horrific moments centered around them, especially on the few occasions Ian had went off his meds and went completely psychotic. Ian shook his head out of his thoughts. How could he do this, he had tried to convince his boss to put him on another project, that anyone else could take this one, but he wasn’t having any of it.

 

Mickey shook his head at his co-worker. “Really Jared? thanks a lot, now both of our bosses think I’m a freaking idiot. I need this job, I don’t need them thinking I give a damn what they do in their personal lives. Shit.” Mickey pushed him lightly.

“Oh chill dude. They don’t care. Mr. Greene is cool as shit, and Gallagher was eye-fucking you just as much as you were him, thought I’d help ya out, let him know you were interested.” Jared laughed out loud at himself.

“I was not Eye-fucking the guy.” Jared shrugged and walked off. Truth was if he didn’t need the job, he would have walked out at the sight of Ian, It was just fantastic, the one person he didn’t want to see, was everywhere, and now he was going to be in his face everyday. Fuck.

Ian had locked himself in his office as long as he could, part of his new job was to be out there, not just locked in an office with paperwork. He sighed. He didn’t want to face Mickey, in fact he didn’t want to be anywhere near him. _Can’t always have what you want_! He heard Mickey’s words echoing in his head again. He tried to breathe, realizing what time it was. Time to dose himself, he headed out to get them out of his car. He had to remember to keep some in the new office. He walked outside only to be stopped by a dark-headed man who once was his everything pacing a few feet from the office. “Mickey?” Ian questioned.

Mickey looked up at the sound of his voice. Fuck. “Umm, Hey, I, Uh, wanted to talk to you.” Mickey stuttered. Wanted wasn’t the right word, need to beg you not to fucking fire me, more like it. He cringed, what kind of karma bullshit was it, that he had to ask the man who he used to love, to not hold their past against him. “about me, um working here.” Ian raised his eyebrows.

“You quitting?” Mickey shook his head.

“Look Ian, I actually really need this job to, You know stay out. I just didn’t want anything, to you know…” Ian rolled his eyes, he actually rolled his eyes. Asshole.

“Seriously? You think I’m that unprofessional. I’m not going to fucking fire you because of some bullshit from years ago alright?” Mickey nodded. If only it was from years ago, it was all still eating at Mickey. The Break-up, that first visit, the few random visits over the few years that followed, that last fight, all of it. It was like a running movie in his head. The entire relationship was like that, playing over and over again.

Ian walked past Mickey not saying anything else. He didn’t have time for this shit. He was already an hour past when he should have taken his meds, and he really didn’t need his bi-polar fucking up his mind, especially now. He rummaged through the car for a minute and grabbed the pills and a bottle of water and swallowed them down. He looked back, but Mickey was gone, back to working. Thank fuck. He didn’t need this shit. He kept seeing everything it was torture. He tried to distract himself as he talked to the crew about what he expected but every time he looked at Mickey he had to remember to breathe. He didn’t see just another construction worker, he saw the boy who stole his heart all those years ago. In that bedroom where it all begun. _If you kiss me_ … he shook his head at the memory. He wanted to forget all the times after that. The fucking, over and over and over again. Always wondering how Mickey had felt back then, ironically he knew exactly how Mickey felt about him now, pure hatred.

 

“Fuck, that aint good.” Mickey heard Jared say.

“What?” he asked confused looking up from his work. He was trying to focus, the day was almost over. Almost away from the red-head filling his thoughts. Having him in person was pure torture. The memories, of laughing with him, loving him, fucking him. It was killing him, he felt like he was that same teenager again, being pulled into something he knew he wasn’t ready to admit.

“Bossman looks stressed, like he…nevermind.” He shook his head. Obviously Jared had worked with Ian more than once, he seemed to know a lot about him.

“Looks fine to me.” Mickey said shrugging brushing the guy off. He knew it wasn’t true, but he wanted to believe it was. He was fine, Ian was fine, they had been done for years, it was done.

\------------------------------

Work had been done for a few hours, Ian sat looking at the clock long enough. “Fuck it, I’m going out.” He grabbed his keys and headed out the door. He needed a drink, or a million. He knew it was a bad idea, Alcohol with his meds, was a bad fucking combination, it was like inviting his bi-polar out to play for a few hours, he never knew which version of himself would come out. Well with his current state, it was pretty obvious it would be a bad idea. He told himself one drink, but he knew better. He was in the bar a few hours later, completely gone. Words echoing in his head, flashes of Mickey in his _head. You mean nothing to me, I hate you. You are nothing but a warm mouth, I don’t need you or your fucked up brain_. He took a drink everytime one of those words popped into his head, all of the bad things Mickey had ever said to him.

Mickey rolled his eyes. He was once again getting dragged out of the house for a night out. It was Iggy this time. “Come on, we can go to one of your gay clubs, get you some ass. Get your fucking ass up, I know what you’re doing. Get him off your mind bitch.” Mickey rolled his eyes.

“Fine, let's go. Whatever, I need a drink anyway.” He was going to regret that sentence later. In fact standing in the middle of this bar, drunk off his ass, he already was. It had only taken a short amount of time before he had consumed way more alcohol than he really needed to. It didn’t take long before he lost sight of his brother, a few guys had tried to dance up on him, but he didn’t care, the sight of a familiar man had already caught his eye. Ian. Fuck he looked good. In his drunken state he didn’t care to deny it. The man was gorgeous. He felt himself getting up and swaying towards the red-head.

Ian turned around when he felt a set of hands on his hips. He turned quickly to find out who was groping him and his eyes fell on a set of familiar ones. The same eyes that looked at him with hatred usually were filled with a familiar fire. He tilted his head. “You sure, you want to be doing that?” Ian asked slurring his words. Mickey nodded at him.

“You…”He touched Ian’s face. “I hate you.” Ian nodded.

“I know, I remember, you never loved me, you hate me, I’m nothing to you,” Ian choked out. Mickey’s eyes went dark for a minute, then he pulled Ian towards him.

“Why did you have to come back into my life, you are everywhere, and all I want to do…”Mickey growled at him.

“What Mick, you want to do what? Hit me, Fuck me, which is it?” he yelled back.

“Both.” Mickey slurred. Ian felt something rise inside of him. He no longer had any control over his action. He was trashed, his mind no longer gave a fuck about anything, he wanted to feel something. He grabbed Mickey hand and dragged him with him.

“Where we going? You gonna take advantage of me?” he giggled. Mickey Milkovich actually just fucking giggled. He turned towards the man, and pushed him up against a nearby building. Inches away from his face. And suddenly he couldn't take it anymore he pulled the man into him, and kissed him, angrily, and full of force. They stumbled for a minute. Walking further down the street. 

“Why? Why'd you have to leave me? I did everything for you. I fucking came out for you!” Mickey screamed filling his rage.

“Because I'm a piece of shit, remember? Because I was never going to be what you wanted.” Ian yelled defeated. Mickey looked at him and balled up his fist.“Do it! Fucking hit me.” Ian yelled. Mickey did. 

“Oh fuck.” Mickey said, shocked at his own actions. Mickey looked around and grabbed Ian pulling him closer to him. Touching Ian's face, a little blood touching his fingers.

They kept walking until they were outside of Mickey's apartment. As they stumbled up the stairs Mickey kept talking incoherently. "I Fucking loved you, asshole. You were everything I wanted, from the first time, forever." They were at the door now. Mickey pulled Ian into another kiss as they made their way into the apartment. "I got this for you, and it fucking hurt, you didn't even care!" he said pulling his shirt off, showing his tattoo showing Ian's misspelled name. Ian touched Mickeys chest tracing his hand over it. He felt the tears in his eyes.

"I was fucking numb, I said, I'd wait for you." he growled out. Mickey punched him in the side.

"For what? Like 10 minutes, until you were all over someone who wasn't me!"

Ian grabbed Mickey again pulling him in for another, hatefully lusted kiss. Pushing Mickey even further towards the edge. “I did fucking wait! I kissed the idiot, a few times, I dated him, I wanted to be fucking normal Mick, we were never normal!” he screamed at him. He drunkenly looked into the eyes of a man he once swore was his everything, and did the only thing he could do, he ripped his shirt off. Running his hands over his nicely toned chest. Biting and licking at his neck.

“I just wanted you, I was willing to do anything for you. You abandoned me Ian.” He finally said defeated. Ian pulled him closer, edging towards the couch. Mickey shook his head, pulling him with him to the bedroom. “I came to you Mick, I told you I loved you, I told you I was sorry, that I was leveled out, that I never wanted anything but you. What did you fucking say? You told me, You were glad you got locked up, you said you were happy I left, that I did you a favor.” Ian whispered, starting to feel the tears coming to his eyes.

“Hit me.” Mick said simply. Ian shook his head.  “Do you want me to repeat what I said then, do it, fucking hit me, You killed me, I hate you! Fucking hit me!” Mickey screamed. Ian finally did.

“Fuck, Mick, I'm sorry.”

“Stop saying your sorry! You left me! Then you came back like it was going to make it better, I was rotting in jail.” Mick screamed, pulling Ian closer to him. Ian was full on crying and bleeding everywhere by now. “I always loved you, I still do asshole!” Mickey screamed, pulling at Ian’s jeans, begging for them to come off. Ian undressed himself and Mickey. Pulling themselves to each other, they collapsed onto the bed, kissing, begging.

“Mick…we shouldn’t do this. I can’t survive this again, I can’t survive us.” Ian spoke weakly from under Mickey.

“It’s too late now Gallagher, I can’t look at you anymore, and not feel this.” He said grabbing Ian’s hand and pulling it to his erection. “I hate you, and I love you! What the fuck am I supposed to do about that?”


	3. Flashes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian and Mickey can't remember what they did or didn't do. One things for sure, it must have been one hell of a night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reviewing. Don't worry in time everything will be explained.

Chapter 3: Morning after.

Ian woke up looking around at his surroundings. 'Where the fuck am I?' he asked himself looking around the room. Afraid to look beside him. His whole body hurt, especially his face. What the hell? He hadn’t been that drunk in a long time. He finally managed up the courage to look beside him. There beside him was Mickey, also covered in a little blood, face swollen, completely naked. Fuck! He looked over at the table beside him. “FUCK!” he said a little too loud, trying to hush himself. He slowly started to get up, he was running late, he had to be at work, in 20 minutes, and he didn’t even know where his car was. Mickey shot up out of bed looking at Ian horrified.

“What the fuck happened?” Mickey asked looking around.

“Fuck if I know... What I do know is I have to be at work like now, and I don’t know where my car is. Umm, How far away from Jynx Bar do you live?” He asked lightly.

“Like 5 minutes.” Mickey said holding his head.

“Fuck, did I get hit by a fucking bus?” he yelled out. Ian was getting his clothes on, He picked up his ripped shirt.

“Fucking kidding me, really? What you do, put it through a shredder?” he looked over at Mickey who started laughing.

“Fucking damn. Closet, just grab something, I don’t fucking care.” He said pointing. Ian nodded going to find something.

Finally Mickey watched as Ian came out of the bathroom dressed.

“This will have to do, I have to get going. See you at work?” Ian asked looking at Mickey. Mickey nodded.

“You look like shit, Gallagher.” He smirked.

“Go look in a mirror, Milkovich, You look pretty bad too.” Ian shrugged before he turned around and left. What the fuck happened? Mickey thought as he got up to get ready for work. Ian was right, they both looked like hell. Did they beat the shit out of eachother? Did they fuck? Well they definitely did. All signs pointed to both. Blood, swollen face, used condom. He felt refreshed and also like he had died. Fucking Gallagher.

When Mickey got to work, the guys were already there. “The fuck happened to you?” Jared asked. Mickey shrugged.

“Bar fight” he stated simply and got to work.

“huh, you too?” Mickey looked up at jared trying to look confused.

“You too?” he asked.

“Nah, Bossman in there, Looks like he got the fuck knocked outta him.” Mickey laughed.

“Huh, doesn’t seem like the fighting type.” Mickey snickered.

“Oh fuck, must be in trouble.” Jared said looking at Mickey.

“What?” He said looking up at the car coming in. Fuck! It was Mandy’s and she was driving in like a bat out of hell.

“Over protective roommate. She does this sometimes.” Mickey nodded trying to stay out of sight.

Ian looked up when his office door swung open, an extremely pissed off roommate and best friend standing there with her arms crossed. “WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO YOU?!?” she screamed looking at his swollen face.

“Chill, I’m fine. You should see the other guy, all good.” He laughed. She grunted.

“Fucking seriously, you go beat up on some poor schmuck, pretending he’s Mickey or some shit? You can’t go out and fuck off like that, you know what happens!” she screamed. He rolled his eyes.

“Mandy, seriously, calm down. Its fine, I had too much, I get it, but I’m still here, nothing too awful happened. I got hit a few times, I deserved it. No big deal.” He shrugged her off. He may not have remembered much, but he knew that He deserved those hits, wouldn’t be surprised if he asked Mickey to hit him. It was a long time coming.

When Mandy finally came out of the office, Mickey tried to go off and do something as far away from the office as he could, but he knew when she saw him. It was hard not to. “Dude, I’d run, that bitch looks pissed, and shes looking at you.” He heard Jared say.

“MICKEY MILKOVICH!!” She screamed walking towards him.

“Fuck!” He yelled. “hey Mands…whats up?” he asked sweetly.

“Don’t fucking, whats up me. Did you do that? His face?” she asked and Mickey didn’t answer.

“Dude, you got in a fight with the boss? You tryin' to get fired.” Jared spoke from behind him.

  
“Boss?” Mandy asked, noticing for the first time, Mickey’s working attire. “Oh fuck.” She shook her head. She brought her hand up to Mickey’s face and he winced. “You two are so fucking stupid.” She sighed and walked away. Mickey hung his head a little and sighed, the guys around him were snickering and whispering.

“You really punch the boss?” Jared asked eyeing him. The guy no longer looked like he was joking. He and Ian were obviously friends, or at least friendly.

“Truth. I don’t really remember who I punched, or who punched me.” Technically it wasn’t a lie. He knew who had punched him, he just didn’t remember it. It was that moment that Ian chose to come out of his office.

“Alright! Back to work! Does this look like a gossip mill to you? Sorry about the interruption, best friend gets a little worried about me at times, no reason to stand around here talking it to death.” Ian Sighed. Jared went up to Ian and whispered in his ear and Ian's eyes got big for a second. “Fucking Mandy.” He shook his head. “Back to work boys.” He went back to whatever he was doing and so did everyone else. Of course Jared wouldn’t shut up about it.

“She seemed to know you.” He commented.

“Who?” Mickey said absentmindedly. His sister was the last thing on his mind.. He was concentrating on last night, more than a little pissed at himself. 10 years without Ian, After 10 years, he was pretty certain he had sex with Ian, after 10 years and he couldn’t remember it. Fuck the fighting, If he was going to suffer around Ian, least he could have is the memory of what it was like after 10 years.

“The girl, Gallagher’s girl. The crazy bitch that came up and screamed at you.” He laughed.

“Hey! Watch how you talk about my sister.” Mickey snapped and then shrugged. “Yeah, I know her.” And laughed.

 

Ian sighed after a long day at work. Fucking Mandy. Everything was fine until she showed up. The guys assumed he got in some sort of fight, but until his big mouthed best friend connected the dots for them, not one person even assumed that he got his swollen face from the new guy. Way to earn respect from your crew Gallagher, let them all know that the new guy beat the shit out of you and still somehow kept his job. The last thing he needed was a call from Mr.Greene about this shit the day after he promoted him. Alan Greene had done a lot for him, had faith in him. Fuck. He walked in his apartment and slammed the door causing Mandy to jump. “Thanks a lot.” He said to her.

“The fuck I do?” She asked grabbing her purse.

“Way to tell the people that work for me that your brother punched me. Those gossiping Nancy's wouldn't stop talking about it.” She shrugged.

“Well he did. Didn't he?” She eyed him.

“Maybe, but that shit doesn't need to go around or get back to Mr. Greene. You tryin to get Mick fired?” He sighed and she shook her head.

“I'm sorry, I just saw him, his face a little swollen and I knew and I just freaked out okay. What even happened?” She asked lightly.

“Fuck if I know.” He shrugged. She sighed.

“You coming to dinner tonight? Yev asked about you today?” He shook his head. “I don't think so, I'll call him and tell him myself.” She shook her head.

Mickey sat at the counter listening to his son tell him about a million things at once. He heard a phone ring and looked at his son. “Oh great, uncle Ian, he's gonna tell me he can't come to dinner. Again.” He sighed.

“You and Ian pretty close huh?” He asked his son.

“Yeah, I mean he used to come around a lot, he doesn't anymore. Always has something to do.” He said before answering. “Hey unc…yeah.. Oh yeah? But you haven't been over in weeks. I know, I promise, everything's fine…” Mickey sighed looking at Yev’s sad expression.

“May I?” He asked holding out his hand for the phone.

“Umm sure. Dad wants to talk to you. Yeah, I love you too. Yeah sure next time.” He sighed handing the phone over.

Mickey picked up the phone sighing. Almost instantly regretting what he was about to do. “Yeah Mick?” He heard Ian ask lightly.

“Just get your head out of your ass and come over here.” Mickey spoke annoyed.

“Excuse me? You really want me to come over there. You'll be forced to look at me all night, and play nice.” Ian chuckled from the other end.

“It's not about me, he looks like someone shot his favorite puppy. Just get your ass over here. The kid wants to see you. No punching, I swear.” Mickey said and hung up.

“Hey! I wasn't done with that.” Yev yelled.

“Oh calm down, uncle Ian will be here soon.” He rolled his eyes. He knew Ian would show up, he didn't even have to wait for his answer.

“Seriously? How did you get him to say yes?” Yev asked. Mickey shrugged his shoulders.

“I got a way with words kid.”

When Ian walked into the house he was greeted by Yev's running up to him and enveloping him in a huge hug. “Ian!” He smiled warmly at the child. He sure did love that kid. He looked up at Mickey who was standing in the hallway smirking. He rolled his eyes. Ian and Mickey stayed on opposite sides of the couch as Yev went on about his day. “And then she said…” Ian laughed.

Mickey watched his son and his ex interact like they were best friends. It killed him that he had been locked up for the past 10 years, missing out on these moments. Ian excused himself to outside for a cigarette and Yev smiled brightly at Mickey. “Thanks dad. It's been the best having everyone here.” Mickey nodded.

“Sure kid. Any time." His kid looked up at his face.

“You and uncle Ian both look like you got in a fight. Not with each other right?” He asked. Mickey smiled.

“Nah, you know, aunt Mandy gets violent sometimes” he yelled over his shoulder.

“Oh shut up. I didn't hit you. But I can if you want?” She yelled back. He laughed.

“Me and your uncle, we're good. Promise.” He lied.

“I know your full of shit, but it's okay dad, I know your mad at him, just don't be too mad okay? He loves you, and he took care of us.” He stated simply.

“Yeah? How?” He saw Mandy whip her head around shaking it violently at Yev.

“He gave us this house!” He said. Mickeys eyes got big and he got up.

“Excuse me? Did you say he..?” Yev nodded like he was saying Ian gave him a toy car for his birthday, a house? How could he afford a house? And why did he give it to Svet, why was he living in a semi-okay apartment and he was housing his son and his ex-wife.

Ian looked up as Mickey stepped out into the balcony and lit a cigarette. “Hey.” Ian said looking at him. Mickey looked…well not happy, not angry, he couldn't place his finger on it.

“You bought them a house?” He asked. Ian shook his head laughing.

“Oh Yev, that kid I swear. I didn't buy them a house. It's not paid off yet.” He shrugged.

“Wait…you are paying for a house for my son and his mother and you live in that shitty apartment? What gives?” Ian sighed again. How was he supposed to find the words to say, I was buying it for us. After all that's why he had signed the damn lease 9 years ago, with hope that he could win Mickey back and when he got out, they would live in it together. He couldn't do that. So he just shrugged.

“I like my apartment better, so I asked Svet if she'd like to stay in it,” he lied. Truth was after Mickey had told him he hated him and never wanted to see him again, he had told Svet simply that he didn't deserve the house or the dreams he had for it and begged her to move into it. To build a life with her son in it. He had wanted someone to get some happiness in the place he had imagined spending his life in.

Mickey stared down his former lover, he was lying, he could feel it but he didn't push, he wasn't sure he wanted to know the truth. Whatever it was, Ian obviously didn't want to tell him, and judging by Mandy's face earlier, it was probably something he didn't want to hear. So he let it go. “I'll pay you back for it.” He said. Ian shook his head.

“No need. Svet already pays me.” He lied again. Once again Mickey decided not to push.

“Sorry for your face.” Mickey pushed out.

“I deserved it,” Ian said and walked back inside.

Ian stayed for a while longer, before finally deciding it was acceptable to excuse himself and get the hell out of there. He was starting to feel suffocated, with Mickey eyeing him. He hugged everyone except Mickey and started to walk out the door. “I'll walk you out.” Mickey spoke. He saw Mandy give him the evil eye but she didn't say anything.

Mickey closed the door behind him and Ian looked at him for a second. “Goodnight Mick.”

“That's all you gonna say Gallagher?” He asked.

“What do you want me to say?” He looked at the ground.

“Look, I don't remember what happened, you don't either, but something happened, say anything.” Mickey said frustrated.

“I'm sorry that I hit you. I'm sorry that I drank so much that I don't remember why I did, and I'm really sorry that I was too trashed to remember what happened after the punching.” He said sadly.

Mickey laughed for a second. “That's what you got? You're sad you missed the fucking part?” Mickey asked.

“Well yeah. What kind of bullshit is it that I finally have sex again and I can't even remember the shit.” Mickey wanted to ask what that meant, how long has it been? But he didn't.

“Well good night Ian. We’ll talk later I guess. Its obvious we aren't going to be able to avoid each other.” Ian nodded and left.

 

Mickey tossed and turned in his sleep. Flashes In his head. Pulling Ian to him, yelling, kissing, punching. He woke up and sat straight up. “Fuck was that?” He asks himself already knowing. He was seeing flashes of that night. Not much, just fighting and a kiss and Ian telling him to hit him. He tried to will his mind to rest, he tried to tell himself to fast forward past the fighting. Anything but it wasn't working. He wasn't even getting all of it as it was. God only knew what he had admitted to Ian, did he tell him all of his secrets, his thoughts and what had Ian told him. As much as he knew those memories would kill him, eat at him, he couldn't help it, he wanted them. He picked up Ian's torn shirt off the ground and pulled it to him.

Ian stared at his wall unable to sleep. Fucking Mickey. If this was all it took to pull him back in, he was screwed. His phone buzzed and he looked at it and sighed. _Hey._ Mickey. Really? He wanted to throw his phone across the room but it buzzed again.

Mickey: You up?

Of course he was up. Who could sleep when sexy exes were swimming around in your head. He suddenly had a flash of Mickeys chest, tracing his hand across that tattoo. _Yup._ He answered finally.

Mickey: You want to bring back my shirt?

Ian laughed.

Ian:Right now? It's 3am.

Mickey: I like that shirt.

Ian laughed again. What was Mickey doing? Has he been drinking again.

Ian: You sober?

Mickey: You medicated?

Ian: Point taken, on my way.

Ian didn't know what the fuck he was doing but he couldn't stop himself. He put Mickeys shirt on him and got dressed and left.

Mickey opened his door to see Ian leaning against the door frame. He walked in and Mickey eyed him. He got close to Ian and pulled the shirt over his head. “I'll take that, thanks.” He smirked.

“Well I've done my duty, I returned your treasured shirt. Back to not sleeping I shall go.” He turned to leave and was stopped. He turned to see Mickey without a shirt on. “What are you doing?” He said staring at the tattoo. The one that had been running through his mind. He wanted to reach out and touch it.

“It's only fair. Where are you going? Gonna strip and run?” Mickey was flirting with him. What the fuck?

“I brought the shirt? Thought that's what you wanted?” He said

“yeah, now I got it, you come all the way over here to for that?” Mickey asked smirking.

“That's what you asked for.” Ian said in a flirty tone not entirely meaning to.

“And if I asked for something else, what would you do?” He said getting closer to Ian.

“And what is that?” Mickey shook his head.

“Nope, answer first.” He smiled.

“Okay fine, yes, what do you want?” Ian said. Ian looked at Mickey as he saw his expression change from flirty to tired.

“Fuck if I know.” He heard him say under his breath.

“Alright, what would you like me to do?” He asked. Mickey looked back up at him, “Now that's a question I can answer.” Mickey said smirking

 --

 

“No! I am not doing that?” Mickey screamed an hour later laughing.

“It was your idea, if I have to do it, so do you.” He shook his head. 

“That's enough of that. You walking around without a shirt on at work is one thing, me a complete other.” Ian shook his head back. “

Yeah, nobody would even blink twice if you did, asshole. I'm in an office and walking around the site, I'm not actually doin' construction. Me taking my shirt off just looks like I'm trying to get a date.” Ian shook his head.

“still not doing it.” Mickey said.

“Fine then, me either. I'm not stripping at work.” Mickey just looked back up at him.

“What about now?” Mickey said.

“Mick, I already don't have a shirt on.” He said rolling his eyes.

“So, take something else off.” He smirked.

Ian stared at Mickey, he hadn't been faced with this version of his ex-boyfriend in a long time. He was flirty and laughing and at ease and Ian didn't understand why or what had happened, but he liked it. Who knows how long it would last before the Mickey who hated him would re-emerge. So he shrugged and undid his jeans and pulled them off. “Happy?” He asked tilting his head.

“Nope.” Mickey smiled.

“What are we doing Mick?” Ian asked.

 _We shouldn't do this, I can't survive it._ Mickey's face went blank hearing The words repeating in his head. He looked up at Ian. “What?” Ian asked, worry crossing his face.

“Nothing, just a flashback. Been getting those.” He said. Ian stayed silent waiting for Mickey to continue.

“What time is it?” Mickey asked. Ian looked down at his watch.

“shit, it's so late. I gotta go. Before Mandy sends out a search party. Have to get ready for work.” He laughed getting up and pulling his jeans to him.

“Why'd you move in with Ms. Overprotective anyway?” Mickey asked curiously.

“Wasn't really a choice.” He said shrugging.

“What do you mean? How was it not a choice?” Mickey said standing up.

“Not a big deal, it was just strongly suggested at the time that I not be left unsupervised.” He said pulling up his jeans.

“By who?” Mickey asked.

“My psychiatrist.” Mickey touched his hand to Ian's face.

“Shit. How bad was it?” Ian shrugged again.

“I just went off my meds for a while, got pretty rough I guess.” He sighed closing his eyes and then opening them against his better judgement. 

“how long?” Mickey asked.

“What?” ,

“How long were you off the meds Ian?” He asked barely able to breathe. He suddenly felt ashamed of himself. How could he not of asked Mandy when she came to him crying three years ago.

“A few months.” Ian spoke lightly.

“Months? Fuck Ian.” Ian nodded.

“It was a long time ago, I'm on even stronger meds now and I haven't went off of them for three years,” Mickey nodded.

Ian sighed again looking at Mickey. Wanting to say something but not really knowing what he could say. What was he supposed to say, I just wanted to die? I hated myself for what I did to you and I couldn't take it, that he thought going off the meds would make him forget, but it just made it worse. Was he supposed to tell him everything he did in those few months? Especially at the end, the reasons that Mandy freaked out every time his mood was even slightly off. Why she insisted he had seen his doctor constantly before Mickey was released? All of that was too much for him to take, he didn't want Mickey to know it. He smiled up lightly at Mickey. "I'll see you later, this was fun.” Mickey nodded looking at him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is. I assure you what happened to ian, will be explained.


	4. Date?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey gets pushed to ask his boss for a date.

Chapter 4:

Mickey watched Ian while he worked. It was pathetic he knew, but he couldn't help it. For the last two days Ian had looked so out of it. He was worried, he knew he was on meds but it didn't mean that something wasn't clouding up his mind. “Dude, seriously if your going to continue to stare at him, just ask him out. Shit. Maybe he'll be into it.” Jared spoke from behind him laughing.

“Jared leave him alone, you know Gallagher doesn't date. Shit isn't he still on that celibacy kick?” Cody spoke. Mickeys head shot back to the two.

“Celebate? You're saying he doesn't have sex, at all, like some vow, getting closer to God or some shit?” He asked shocked. Bullshit. Cody shrugged,

“Just what I heard. Wouldn't waste your time man, some ex fucked him up pretty bad, pretty sure he's sworn off all that shit.” He laughed.

“Oh fuck off Cody, just because he turned your whore ass down.” He shoved Cody. Mickey stopped listening. They yammered on for a while before adding.

“You scared he'll turn ya down Milkovich?” Jared smirked.

“If I ask him out, will you Pansy bitches, shut up about it?” He asked.

“You wouldn't. Didn't you guys get in a fucking fist fight last week?” Mickey rolled his eyes.

“Wouldn't huh?” He smirked.

“Yo Gallagher! ‘Mere” he motioned. Ian walked over eyeing him suspiciously.

“Did you guys need something?” He asked distantly.

“Yeah. Would you like to go ..” He looked back at the snickering fools.

“Told ya he'd bitch out.” Cody whispered.

“Go where?” He asked ignoring the duo.

“Go on a date with me?” Mickey finished.

“Excuse me?” Ian asked looking at Him.

“You heard me. Dinner. You. Me. Alone.” He crossed his arms.

“Yeah okay.” Ian nodded. “Now I expect that there will be no problem completing every task I assigned for today, since you boys obviously have enough time to stand around and chitchat  
And gossip like a bunch of teenaged girls.” The guys stopped laughing and went back to work.

 

“Are you going out again?” Mandy asked from the couch.

“Got a date.” Ian said simply rolling his eyes.

“You have a what? You haven't been on a date in..”she paused.

“Six years, I know. It's no big deal. Some guy I work with got pressured into asking me out.” He walked out of the bathroom.

“And you said yes…does Mickey know?” She asked suddenly, cringing at her own question.

“Well he was there, so I'm guessing he knows.” Ian answered.

“And he didn't get pissed?” She eyed her best friend.

“Nope, didn't seem to.” He shrugged.

“Speaking of Mickey, how are you guys, you know, getting along?” She looked at him nervously, worry spreading through all of her features.

“Better than I expected.”

“No more punching?”,

“No Mandy, only the one time, which I still don't remember, suppose we needed to, you know, get it out of our systems. 10 years is a long time for anger to build up.” She nodded.

“I'm sorry, I know it gets annoying, me being like this, I just worry, about both of you. That relationship fucked you both up pretty bad.” It was his turn to nod.

“I know Mands, it's okay, just don't wait up alright, I'll be fine. Just a simple date, if you get worried, call me okay?” She nodded.

When Mickey answered the door he smiled. Ian looked amazing and he had to stop himself from leaning in for a kiss. Reminding himself that it wasn't a real date.

“Was wondering if you changed your mind.” He said. Ian shook his head.

“I don't stand up my dates, just had to get past your sister first.” He laughed.

“Oh god, what did you tell her?”

“Just that I had a date.” He shook his head.

“Great, sure she didn't follow you?” Ian nodded.

“Don't you think If she knew I was here she'd be pounding on the door right now?” Mickey nodded.

"Probably. You could have said no if you wanted you know?" Ian nodded again.

"Maybe I didn't want to. The look on those idiots faces, was fucking priceless. took everything I had not to laugh." Ian shook his head.

"What is up with that anyway? Why are those guys so interested in what you do, or who you do it with. Its everyday dude. Today they told me all about you being celebate. Like what the fuck" he laughed.

Ian laughed too. "Jared just likes to fuck around, he saw me at some of my lowest moments, did you know I used to work construction with them? Anyway, he's just like that, always giving me shit for not having a guy around and shit." Mickey nodded.

"Well, its fucking annoying, always talking shit, I probably shouldn't of done it, but that fucker. " He shook his head laughing. Ian nodded.

"He does that, everytime he even gets an idea that one of the guys is gay, he's always trying to talk them into doing exactly what you did today, he played you." He laughed more.

"Eh, oh well. I got a date with the boss out of it." he shrugged, laughing.

"So Gallagher, what do you want to do tonight? Go out, stay in?" Mickey asked eyeing Ian.

"You asked me out, dealers choice." He smiled.

"Alright then, I'll cook, want a drink or something?" Mickey asked.

"You cook?" Ian laughed.

"I can, shitthead, if you're so worried about it, come supervise."

Ian watched Mickey in the kitchen smiling. He wished it could always be like this, simple, flirty and fun, truth was he would give anything to have what they had back, moments like this it all seemed possible but he knew better. "tell me something about the last ten years, anything." Mickey said lightly.

"Umm, you sure that's a good idea, we were getting along so well." Ian laughed.

"Yeah man, I mean, Theres a lot neither of us know, and for a long time I thought I didn't want to know any of it, but I guess I need to." Ian nodded.

"Well, I thought about becoming a firefighter once." he shrugged. Mickey looked up.

"Was it just because of that douche bag, or were you actually interested in it?" Mickey asked sighing.

"Nah, was really interested in it. Just didn't work out, on either counts, turns out boring, normal relationships, totally not my thing. Who knew?" he laughed.

Mickey smiled at Ian. "Boring huh? Well that makes me feel better." He laughed.

"Turns out, only numb heavily medicated Ian, like those things, as soon as the meds evened out, I couldn't get out fast enough." he laughed.

"Hmm, anyone after that?" Mickey mentally kicked himself, why the hell was he asking Ian about his relationships, like he really wanted to know.

"A few I guess, I tried, thinking maybe it was just Caleb that I wasn't into, turns out, not the case. A few years after failed dates and a few relationships, I was pretty much done." Mickey laughed.

"With sex too I hear." Ian nodded."That came later, Bout six years ago." Mickey coughed.

"Wait...Seriously? That wasn't something you just told those idiots, You seriously gave up sex, all together." Ian nodded.

"Well, I did, until, well not that i remember it or anything.” He laughed nervously.

“Holy fuck. 6 fucking years? Why the fuck would you do that?” Ian shook his head.

“Guilt I guess. I made a promise and I broke it. It got to a point where being single wasn't enough. I didn't want any of it.” Mickey frowned.

“Wow. 6 years, nothing, fuck that's intense.” Ian shrugged.

“Wait, not even when you, ya know, weren't medicated and manic and shit?” Ian's eyes got wide.

“Oh fuck, sorry.” Ian laughed.

“It's okay Mick,no, I didn't have Sex then either.” Mickey nodded confused. If he didn't go out and fuck half of Chicago, what did he do. He had said he needed to be fucking supervised.

“What about you Mick?” Ian asked. “Well I was in prison for 10 years. Is a lot of nothing, fighting. I didn't go 6 years without sex, if that's what your fucking asking. But I also wasn't going in prison yard dates and falling in love and shit either.” Ian laughed.

“Point taken.” Mickey looked at him, and before Mickey spoke Ian knew that the next question was going to kill him.

“How many times you go off the meds?” Ian shuttered.

“4.” He stated simply. No use in lying, Mickey could ask around if he really wanted to know. Mickey kept stirring his pot. Not asking. “Once 8 years ago, second almost 6, once four and half and then last time was about 3 years ago. The last time being the longest and the worst.” Mickey nodded. “Well dinners done. Pause on the depressing conversation.” Mickey sighed and Ian nodded.

Dinner was nice. They ate, kept the conversation light and laughed. Mickey kept looking at Ian, soaking in some of the things he learned tonight. Ian offered up anything Mickey asked him without hesitation even if it caused him to have a pained look in his face. It was obvious to him now how much regret Ian held, he hadn't believed it 8 years ago, but he did now. He didn't know what to do with all he was feeling right now, he hadn't wanted to know three years ago, and now he had a need to know, he wanted to know why and how bad it had gotten, he wanted to know how Ian had pulled himself out of it, he wanted to live it with Ian, all the hate and pain and regret. Most of all he wanted to take back the harsh words he had said to Ian that day. He tried not to react when Ian said the first time was 8 years ago. He didn't have to ask, he knew. He had stopped taking his meds because of what he had spewed at him that day, because if his refusal to listen and forgive.

Ian waved his hand in front of mickeys face who seemed to be off in his own world, it looked to a painful world too. He knew he had put that look there. He always had a way of hurting Mickey without meaning to. “I should go.” Ian said sadly.

“What? Why?” Mickey looked offended.

“You don't seem like you want company anymore, especially not mine.” Ian said sadly.

“No, no I'm sorry, just thinking. Stay.” Mickey said reaching across the table to grab Ian's hand.

“Are you sure?” Mickey nodded.

“Yeah, yeah come on, let's watch a movie or some shit.” He got up and pulled Ian with him. They sat on the couch turning in some movie, Ian wasn't even paying attention, just watching Mickey intently.

“Im not gonna burst into tears fuckhead, stop it.” Mickey said eyes On the tv.

“Sorry.” He laughed lightly.

Mickey could still feel Ian's eyes on him. The phrase 6 years repeating in his head. “Oh fuck it!” He practically screamed.

“Wha…” Ian started but was stopped by his own shock at Mickey suddenly straddling him.“Mick…” Mickey shook his head not allowing Ian to try and talk him out of it.

“6 years, you say you didn't wait, that you felt guilty, but you waited for 6 years, for what? Was it for this?” He asked leaning in and running kisses down Ian's neck. Ian moaned lightly.

“Mick, you don't have to do this.” Mickey growled.

“Have to? No. Want to? Yes.” Mickey kissed him hard on the mouth. “M..Mick, we can't go back from this.” He said between kisses.

“Do you want to? You want me to get off of you, you want to go home and try to forget about this pull we have. You want to remember us like we do now? Can you live like this anymore, because I fucking can't. I never wanted to see you again and here we are, in a date we never had, talking about shit that's depressing because we were both in pain, not one of us, both of us. I want to hear about it, and for you to tell me what happened, I want to hold you and tell you a whole bunch of shit I shouldn't want to. There is no going back from us Ian. There never was.” Mick let out looking Ian in the eyes. Ian felt Mickey shift and start to get up but he pulled him back down hard.

“No Mick, I want this, I want us. But I'm not sure I'll survive it again. You don't understand, you weren't there, if you knew, you'd never want to be with me again, you'd always be looking over your shoulder wondering when I was going to snap, like everyone else is, like you used to. You want to live like that again?” Ian sighed.

“I’m not the one who wanted out Ian.” Mick frowned. Ian pulled Micks mouth back to his, missing the feel of him.


	5. Just give me this day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> to move on, first you must deal with the past.

Chapter 5:

Mickey smiled, Looking down at the sleeping redhead next to him. They had made out for the longest time before finally settling in to watch a movie. A different one. They didn't have sex, Mickey was fine with that, just being here with him right now was enough. Finally Ian looked peaceful, asleep in his lap. He looked at the time and sighed. “Ian? Wake up. It's late, your meds.” He regretted saying it. He knew how much Ian hated being reminded like he was a child.

“In jacket. Not time yet. Alarm on phone.” He mumbled.

“What about Mandy?” Mickey asked.

“She will call soon. Mmm.” He mumbled again. Mickey let out a chuckle.

“You want to go lay down then?” He asked.

“Mmmhmm.” He let out. Finally opening his eyes letting out a yawn. “Want me to go?” He asked sleepily.

“Not if you don't want to.” Mickey answered honestly. They finally got up making their way to the bedroom. Mickey had a flash of messily stumbling into the room, kissing and snapped out of it. The tone on Ian's phone went off. Ian grumbled and walked back out to his jacket. Mickey watched as Ian took his meds and came back in.

“All done.” He crawled into Mickey's bed and smiled.

“You said you loved me.” He mumbled again falling back asleep. What? When?

Ian woke up the next morning feeling strangely at peace. He looked over next to him and Mickey was sleeping away. He was mumbling something so Ian got slower to him to listen. “Just tell me, I can handle it baby, just tell me.” He sighed. He shook Mickey lightly.

“Mm hey.” Mickey smiled up at him.

“Sorry, you sounded like you were having a bad dream.” Mickey looked up at him.

“Was I? Huh. Weird.” He smiled. Ian laughed.

“But somehow you look peaceful. Maybe I was imagining it.” Mickey shrugged.

“You hungry?” He asked.

“Gonna cook again?” Ian chuckled. Mickey shrugged.

“You coming to family dinner tomorrow?” He asked.

“Dunno, Yev will probably call later today. He usually does.” Mickey nodded.

“You should. He gets sad when you say no. That kid loves you.”

“He loves you too Mickey.” Mickey nodded.

“Love him too.” Ian nodded.

After breakfast they were lounging around when Ian's phone rang. “I think mamma Mandy wants to check and make sure Ian didn't get kidnapped.” He laughed.

“Hello, hey Mands, yeah I'm good. Yeah date was fine. No, I'm good. Just fell asleep at a friends, no I'm not drunk, I took my meds. Promise. No you don't need to call anyone. I love you too.” Ian hung up the phone.

“Friend huh?” Mickey smirked.

“Well I could of told her I was at my extremely hot ex boyfriends apartment, making out all night, but somehow I think that wouldn't have went over well.” He laughed. Mickey through a pillow at Ian.

"Shut up fuckface." Ian slowly made his way closer to Mickey.

"Say that again, Mick." He raised his eyebrows.

"Fuck...Face." he laughed. "Do something." Ian shrugged.

"Well if you insist." he said placing his hands on Mickey's sweatpants. Mickey's breath hitched in his throat.

"What are you gonna do Gallagher?" he spoke softly. Ian smiled at Mickey. Flirty Mickey was quite possibly his favorite version of the man. "Come on with it...What you planning on doing there? You just gonna tease me? Or you gonna be about something?" He laughed. In one swift motion Ian pulled on Mickey's pants, pulling them off of him and tossing them aside.

"Mmm, Always did like the look of you with less clothes." Mickey laughed. "Or none at all." He said removing the little amount of clothing he had left on.

"Now Firecrotch, I'm the only one naked here, I feel a little exposed." Ian smirked.

"Oh yeah? You don't like that? How about if i do this?" He spoke placing kisses down Mickey's stomach making his way lower. "Mmm, Don't start it if you don't plan on finishing it Gallagher.” Ian smiled.

“Oh I plan on finishing something alright.”

 

Ian and Mickey layed on the couch naked, both bearly awake smiling. “Tell me about the first time.” Ian looked up at him sleepily.

“About what?” He closed his eyes again.

“You know, eight years ago. Tell me.” Ian shook his head.

”no” he sighed.

“It's okay, I know it was because of me, I know what I said to you was harsh and cruel, and untrue, but I was angry. I need to hear what I caused.” Mickey said.

“I just want to enjoy this for a moment Mickey.” Mickey brought his lips to Ian's.

“I'll make you a deal, we can enjoy today just like this, I won't even ask again but I need to know, I missed so much and those things that happened and the reasons for them, they are just as important as this. They are apart of you, as much as you are a part of me.” Ian nodded

They were leaving the apartment when Ian suddenly stopped Mickey when Ian got to his car. “Here.” He pulled out a box from his trunk.

“What is this?” Mickey asked.

“Letters, I never sent them, but I wrote down all of it. For over 8 years.” Mickey looked at him.

“Why didn't you send them?” He asked.

“Would you have really read them?” He sighed.

“Maybe not at first but I would have eventually. Didn't you know that? I mean after I sent you that letter, didn't you think i'd read yours?” Mickey stated and Ian looked at him confused.

“What letter? The last I heard from you was that day you said you hated me. That shit broke me, why would I send them after that?” Then Mickey looked at him sadly and realization dawned on him.

 

All through dinner Mickey and Ian stared at Mandy, already knowing what they hadn't yet asked. When Yev and Svet finally excused themselves and made it upstairs, Mandy looked back at them. “What the fuck is up with you two? Neither one of you has spoken since you got here. Not a word. To each other I get, but not to anybody?” She seemed frustrated.

“Where's the letter Mandy?” Ian asked obviously not able to contain it anymore.

“What letter?” She looked confused for a second.

 

“The letter I wrote to him. The letter you somehow got your hands on, I know you did Mandy.” She sighed.

“So what? Like I was going to let him read that and fall apart again. Fuck you Mickey.” She glared at her brother.

“I had a right to see it!” Ian screamed.

“Really? Because it could of said anything Ian, you had just gotten back on your meds, after the first time, you had just called and begged me to come home and you were finally trying to get your life together, I didn't know what was In there, just months before that he ripped your heart out.” Ian went to say something and Mickey stopped him.

“I was apologizing you twat. For not being there for not being a better friend for not understanding, you think I'm that much of a heartless bastard. I said some fucked up shit, I was angry, I thought when he didn't answer that he didn't fucking care anymore.” She shook her head.

“How was I supposed to know that, I was scared okay, I almost gave it to you so many times but everytime you'd go off your meds, I just couldn't.” She shook lightly. “You weren't here Mickey, you didn't see…” Ian stopped her.

“Don't fucking do that. I did some fucked up shit. I was drowning in my own self loathing, you still didn't have a right to keep that from me.” He was exhausted and pissed off.

“And what if it sent you off the deep end Ian, like three years ago? You fucking tried to kill yourself Ian!” She had tears streaming down her face now.

“You what!?!” Mickey heard himself yell but couldn't believe it was him.

“Mick…” He tried to reach for him.

“Give me a minute. I need air. I'm not leaving okay, I just can't be in here right now.” Mickey walked out the door, going to his car and slamming his fist against the wheel and then he sat and cried. He didn't even need to hear the details right now, Ian, his Ian had tried..but why? Mandy obviously blamed him in a way, but what did that have to do with the letter. He had send that years before, why wouldn't she have told him, forced him to listen. What would of happened if he had succeeded, would everyone have waited three years to tell him that the love of his life was gone?

“I'm going out there!” Ian said watching the window.

“Don’t.” She spoke.

“What? Are you kidding me? He's your brother! He just found out that I could of fucking died and nobody told him, not even me.. How could you be so heartless. What would you feel like if nobody told you!? If You came back to find out about it from someone else. I was going to tell him, fuck, I was working my way up to that, it's not something you just scream out. I'm going out there because that man is everything, just because he isn't sick doesn't mean his pain is less important than mine!” He yelled out and walked out to find Mickey now sitting on the porch, box clutched to his chest. “Hey.” Ian spoke softly sitting down but far enough away not to freak Mickey out. Mickey looked up at him.

“The scar? The one Mandy said was from a construction accident, it was…” Ian nodded.

“Well it happened at a construction site, so…” Mickey brought his hand up to his own face to wipe away some new tears.

“Is there a suicide note in this box Ian?” Ian shook his head.

“That is at home, hidden. I didn't want you to see it yet, I was going to explain first. I don't even remember writing it. I don't remember a lot about that night. Except that Mr.Greene is the one that found me like that, most of what I know, someone has told me, psychiatrist said I blocked it. I can't tell you why exactly, but I remember calling out for you. Begging you to love me again. It's not your fault I did that. I can see it in your face, you didn't leave me, I left you.” Mickey nodded.

Mickey felt himself shaking. “If only I would have known, if I hadn't yelled at you, you're wrong Ian, this is my fault. You called out for me because I promised I'd be there. Even in that damn letter I told you I'd be there, that I would never cut you off, no matter what. I just wished I would have said that to you, instead of all of those hateful words.” Mickey placed his head in his hands. After a minute, he felt Ian lifting his head back up.

“Nope, I went off my meds, I did that. I lied to everyone, I let myself slip into that horrible place, I should have just tried to see you. I should have begged Svet to get me in or anybody else that I knew you would see. I should have kept coming back until you listened, I didn't because that takes effort and I didn't want to care anymore. But I did. I did. I still do. I love you so fucking much. I tried living without you, and guess what? It fucking sucked, I know this a lot to take in, if what I did is too much, I'll understand. I'll give you time with it. Read the letters, I'll bring you the last one in a few weeks, I'll give you whatever you need, I'm so sorry you found out like this.” Ian said sighing but he didn't go back inside, he went to his car. Mickey watched him drive away.

Finally Mandy emerged from the house looking down at Mickey. “I'm sorry, Ian's right, you’re my brother, I should have been trying to protect the both of you, not just him. I just…” She sat down crying.

“You promised me, I know.” He sighed.

“I was so scared but I should have told you all of it, I know.” She sighed.

“I know Mandy, I love you, I can't look at you right now, but I love you.” He said getting up.

 

Three weeks later……

Mickey watched Ian closely, he tried not to be so obvious. The boys at work already gave him hell, and he found himself wanting to take out his frustration on them, south Chicago style but he didn't. He just tried to ignore them mostly. Which only worked because his mind was on Ian and his letters.he had started reading them, at first feeling a little weird about it, but it was truly amazing to read the words that Ian has meant for only him. It was like screaming out to him, I still love you, I always did. The one he had read just this morning had him all in knots.

_\-- Back on the meds again. I made a decision today, I'm not going to have sex anymore. Everytime I do, I feel gross and self-loathing boiling up in me. No matter who it is, I wish they were you. I find myself remembering when I said I'd wait for you. Maybe I didn't mean it then, but it repeats inside me, just as much as the hate in your eyes the last time I saw you. I want to feel your arms around me, not anyone else's. Someday maybe I'll tell you that, even if you laugh at me, even if you push me away, I'll wait for you, forever if I have to. --_

Mickey shuttered and absentmindedly started to pull his shirt off. “Fuck it's hot.” He turned not even thinking until he saw Jared's horrified face.

“What the fuck is that? You only had one date, geez man, you better cover that shit up.” He looked at Jared confused until he remembered.

“Fuck!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well there was kind of a start to it. What happened to Ian will be explained further. Hope you liked it. Let me know. Much love to all of you who review. I love you guys.


	6. Tell me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian and Mickey have a chat.

Chapter 6:

Ian looked up from where he was standing to see what was going on. Mickey looked pissed, in fact he looked like he was about to throw a punch. “What the fuck, sorry boss, looks like I have a crew to reign in, I'll call you right back. I'll be over at your office in the morning.” He hung up and ran outside. “Woah! What the hell is going on out here? Mickey, walk away!” Mickey seemed to snap out of it for a second and backed up from the guy who had pissed him off. He had fully expected it to be Jared considering the shit he had been giving Mickey but it wasn't. It was another guy, Garrett. “The fuck is going on here?” He crossed his arms.

“Nothing boss, just giving the guy shit.” Garrett said. He looked over at Mickey for confirmation.

“Nah it's good. I just forgot, about the tattoo. Garrett here was inquiring about it. No big.” Mickey brushed it off. Ian laughed.

“So they found out you can't spell?” Ian joked. Jared looked over at Ian.

“You knew?” Ian nodded.

“Isn't that what your supposed to do on a date?” Ian joked and the boys laughed and shook their head. “Seriously though, I've seen it, a long time ago, now if we are done inquiring about shit that is nobody's business, back to work huh?” The guys nodded.

 

Mickey knocked on Ian's apartment door, unfortunately he person he wanted to see didn't answer, his sister did however. “Hey.” She said silently.

“He here?” He asked. She shook her head. “He hasn't been staying here. He isn't talking to me.” She said quietly.

“Can't really blame him on that. Do you happen to know where he is?” She shrugged walking over to the counter handing him a piece of paper.

“That's the address.” He nodded.

“Don't hurt him.” She sighed.

“What was that?” She turned to him.

“Just, be careful, that's all.” She said walking into her room.

Ian Heard the knock on the door. He sighed, probably Mandy again. He swing open the door ready to tell her again that he didn't want to talk right now but it wasn't Mandy, it was Mickey. “Oh hey. Sorry thought it was your sister again.” Mickey nodded.

“Yeah, she looks like hell.” Ian laughed.

“Come in.” Ian walked back into the apartment to set on the couch.

“You come for the letter?” Ian asked sadly.

“I've had plenty of reading material as of late.” Mickey said. Ian nodded. “How are you?” Mickey asked.

“Me? I'm fine, considering, I'm a little more worried about you though.” Ian honestly answered.

“Why’s that? I'm not going anywhere, we need to talk about this.” Ian nodded.

“I know, I just figured you needed time, it's a lot to take in, you know to find out your ex is even crazier than you thought.” Mickey got up and sighed moving closer to Ian.

“Hey I happen to like the guy, I will not stand for talk like that.” Ian smiled.

“Still? Sure you don't want to run? I get it.” He frowned. “Really? Fuck you think your talking to Gallagher? I'm here aren't I, to do all this talking shit I hate so much, you think I do that for just anyone?” Ian laughed again. “Look Ian, I was reading, and fuck I hate reading you know? But reading your thoughts like that, fuck it's intense. I need a break from it, so I want you to talk, I'm going to sit here and you are going to explain some shit. I need to know, not from anyone else but you.” Mickey said.

Ian breathed in as Mickey curled up on top of him, laying his head on Ian's chest. “I tried to end it all.” Ian felt his chest tighter as Mickey held him. “I stopped taking the meds, for months I lied, pretended everything was fine. I was really good at acting like I was fine until I wasn't anymore.” Mickey nodded. “I would fall asleep and see your face, your disappointment, your hate. I had it all, all I had to do was take the meds, and I'd still have you, I know it doesn't make since why I didn't just take the meds then, to do what you would have wanted but I didn't.” Mickey looked up and stroked Ian's face. “I remember screaming for you, I ran that night, I was looking for you, I don't know why, I was so out of it, I even called your old phone, none of it makes sense , I don't know. I vaguely remember going to the construction site, breaking into the office and getting out the paper. When I remember it, I remember crying, I remember writing but I don't remember the words. I really don't remember even thinking those things, but I did. I obviously did because that's where Alan found me. He got a call of a break in, I tripped an alarm, he was down the road so he got there before the police did. He said I was lying there, in…” Mickey felt his own tears falling down his cheeks as he sat up a little listening.

“It's okay, I'm not going anywhere.” Ian nodded.

“I was lying covered in my own blood, calling out for you. Said I was begging you to forgive me. I guess he got there in time because I was rushed to the hospital, I was out for a few weeks after that though.” Mickey cringed before asking.

“Out? Like coma? Or medicated?” Ian sighed.

“Medically induced coma I guess. After the surgery, after fixing me up, they put me out so I could heal, or whatever. I don't know. I was taken to a psych ward not long after I woke up. I guess Alan insisted on it, it was actually not bad for a nut house. Got me a doc that specialized in bi-polar and all that shit. Nice lady.” He smiled.

“So you almost died and they just shipped you off, and you were fine?” Mickey asked.

“Fuck, I wish. No. They changed my meds, like God knows how many times. I was in a padded room for a few days once. Kept asking for you. I was like a drooling mess. Everyone visited, but I didn't care, I wanted to die, still.” Mickey nodded.

“Do you now?” He asked.

“No.” He answered simply. “I was in there while I leveled out, I think I was in there for 6 months.” Mickey looked at him shocked.

“Fuck man.”

Mickey continued to listen to Ian and it was breaking his heart. He thought Ian trying to kill himself was the worst thing he'd ever heard but the after was heartbreaking. He was waiting for Ian to finally say the moment he had decided to live, he wanted to know, he needed it. “So I had these talks with my psychiatrist, I didn't talk to her for the first few months, just kind of sat there staring at her. Finally I started telling her about you.” Mickey shook his head.

“Bet she had a lot to say about that shit.” Ian nodded.

“Sometimes I guess, but she just listened to me for most of it, pushed me to feel what I was feeling. I told her about the letters, she liked that I got my feelings out, but said I needed other ways too, I talked about all of these hopes and dreams I once had, and she asked me what I wanted, if I could have it all, a life that I saw worth living, and I told her about it. About me and you, and what I wanted, the house I once saw us in that I gave to Svet, spending it all together, kids, laughing, all of it.” Mickey nodded. “And then she asked how I was going to have all of that if I was dead.” Mickey coughed.

“She asked you that? I like her.” Ian nodded.

“She was so blunt about it. I said, that's the point, I'm never going to have it. And she shook her head, and just simply looked at me, not if your dead. You can't have any of it, you can't live for yourself or other people, if you die, it's the end, it's done. You can't explain it, you can't take it back, you are no longer here to do anything.” Mickey smiled. “And I thought about it, what was I going to do, write a fucking letter like I had, expecting that you would suddenly understand why, that you would never blame yourself or hate me more for it. I suddenly knew, yeah living without you fucking sucked, but not even being here, sucked worse, I needed to get my shit together, for me, for you, for everything and everyone. It was hard, still fucking is.” He let out a breath.

“So she suggested you not live alone?” He asked remembering the conversation.

“Yeah, and I thought if anyone has my back it was Mandy, so that happened. She took care of me, made sure I took my meds, got to my appointments, she was always right there.” Mickey nodded.

“She did what I couldn't, I should have been here.” He sighed.

“You couldn't be, it's fine.” Mickey shook his head.

“No, nothing about it is fine, I should have been here, I got myself locked up and you fucking needed me, you needed me and I couldn't even tell you that I would always be there, I couldn't tell you that we could have all of those things you wanted, the house, the forever, whatever, because I fucked up and you almost fucking died and I didn't even know.” Ian nodded.

“I'm so sorry Mickey. I should have found a way to tell you.” Mickey shook his head.

“No, you were getting better, you were in hell because you thought I was gone forever and I wasn't. Ian, I don't want you to ever feel like that again. I never want you to think I don't love you. I'm supposed to take care of you.” Ian sighed.

“I never wanted to be your obligation.” He frowned.

“Obligation, are you fucking kidding me? You are my life support, I can't breathe without you. You said you couldn’t survive this again so if you need us to not do this, tell me. I'm not just fucking around Ian. I want to do this the right way, not like before.” Mickey sighed. Ian smiled.

“Yeah, I think my very fragile sanity would agree. I just don't know how to do that. I find myself just wanting it all and so afraid I'll fuck it up.” Mickey nodded.

“We were always good at fucking it up. But I think we can both agree that's not an option anymore, it's not just you that can't survive it again, I can't either.” And Ian knew he meant it.

 

Mickey shifted on the couch, Ian smiled at the man. He was scared as hell looking at him, this was all too perfect in this moment. Mickey had heard what he had done, and he was still there, he didn't yell at him or walk away he was just there, listening to Ian, crying with him, the man was as perfect as he ever was. He wanted to hold on to this forever, but he didn't know how.

“You okay there?” Mickey asked looking up at him.

“Yeah, just thinking about it all. Mickey I love you.” He said lightly like he was afraid of hearing it. Mickey smiled,

“I love you too, that what you're worried about?” Ian shook his head.

“I'm worried that I'm dreaming, that I'm in a drug induced haze and I'm going to wake up and none of it be real.” Ian answered honestly.

“We aren't always going to be perfect, I can't promise you that, we never have been but I will promise you, that I'll be here, in all my fucked up glory.” Ian laughed.

“Speaking of fucked up, there's something else we have to deal with.” Ian growled.

“What?”

“Mandy.” Mickey spoke.

“Fuck that.” Ian sat up abruptly causing Mickey to do they same.

“Hey, I get it, I'm mad as hell too. But I don't know, after hearing what happened, what she saw. You said she got there before they took you away right?” Ian nodded.

“I can't even imagine seeing that.” Ian sighed.

“What she did was before, years before.” Mickey nodded. “Yeah, maybe. But can you even imagine the fear, all those years of being scared of what would push you over the edge, I'm not saying it's right. I'd like to punch her in the face for it honestly, but I just keep thinking, she kept you safe, she spent years of her own life taking care of you, keeping my reason for breathing Alive, she came back for you, she promised to take care of you and she did but she shouldn't of had to and I just, I don’t know, I think we need to deal with it.” Ian nodded.

“Tomorrow. After my meeting. I can't stay here much longer anyway, Alan was nice enough to let me stay this long.” Mickey tilted his head.

“He owns this place?” He asked.

“Yeah, he owns a lot of shit. Svet’s house too.” Mickey nodded.

“He sure does a lot for you.” Mickey raised his eyebrows.

“Yeah, he's a good man. After I broke into his property and practically bled out on him I was sure, he'd press charges, but he didn't, he got me help, gave me a better job, said he saw potential in me if I could get my shit together.” Mickey nodded.

“Come on, we’re going out.” Ian jumped up. Mickey looked at him confused. Ian held up his hands. “Already took them Mick, and now it's time to have some fun. We have sat here for hours talking about me and what I did, well you have been in jail for 10 years, it's time to go out and enjoy life.” Mickey laughed.

“Alright fine princess, where to first?”

Mickey looked around. “Are you fucking kidding me? An amusement park?” Ian laughed.

“Come on, time to have some fun.” Mickey shook his head.

“Nope, not doing it.” He started to walk back towards the car and as if it was on que. “dad! Where are you going?” Ian laughed more.

“You roped my kid into this shit? Unfair.” He turned to see Svet and her boyfriend standing there smiling.

“You and orange boy make up now? Time to have fun with boy.” Mickey grunted.

“Fine, I'll go in there, but there will be no fun having.” He shrugged.

 

 

  
“Come on say it!” Mickey shook his head furiously. “Nope don't know what your talking about.” He laughed at he took another bite out of a corndog.

“Come on, it's true, Mr. Badass had fucking fun. Don't think I didn't see you and Yev running around that waterpark. You loved it, you big goof.” Mickey crossed his arms.

“I was faking it, for the kid.” He smiled. Ian pushed on his arm lightly.

“Whatever.”

“You two back humping now?” Svet asked looking down at the two boys. They shook their heads. While they hadn't technically had sex yet, Not that they could remember. “Shame. You should. Orange boy gets cranky, he needs fuckhead.” She laughed and walked away.

“I should kick her ass.” Mickey said.

“Nah she's right. I do need you, fuckhead.” Ian said laughing.

“Fuck you Gallagher.” Ian smirked at him.

“Gladly.” And he smiled.


	7. My Best-friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian wants his best friend back.

Chapter 7: 

Ian turned his key to his apartment, and walked in looking around. The place was a mess. He sighed. He was half afraid of what he would find beyond the living room. “Mandy!” He called out. He heard some shuffling around and finally after 5 minutes she poked her head around the corner. She looked like she hadn't slept in days, hair was a mess, her pajamas were wrinkled , and sort of looked like she had been wearing them for days. Even her makeup although faded was a wreck, black lines. “Holy fuck! Mandy milkovich!” She sighed. “Come to get your shit or something?” She barked. “Woah, watch it. I came to talk to you, but I can turn right around.” He barked back. “No you won't.” Mickey stepped inside the door. “Fuck, how'd it get worse in a day.” She shrugged. Ian sighed and made his way to the couch. “Fine, Mandy, we need to talk.” She nodded, tears coming to her eyes. “But first your rank ass needs to get in the shower.” Mickey looked her dead in the eye. “Now! Well clean.” She nodded slightly and headed back down the hall. 

Ian sighed picking up some trash. “I didn't know it  
Was this bad. This is like me on a bender, a manic one.” He lightly laughed. “Not funny firecrotch.” Ian nodded not even looking up to see the dirty look Micky was sure to be giving him. “The fuck is this?” Ian asked holding up an envelope. “It's your letter.” Mandy said. “It's not opened.” Mickey commented. “I would never read it. Those words weren't mine to read, I had always intended to give it to you Ian, I just, everytime I almost did, I would freak out, I don't know. It's stupid. I was just so scared, all the fucking time. If anything elver happened to you, it would be on me and it was.” Ian shook his head. “Mandy what I did, every single time I went off the meds, none of that was ever on you. It was my burden. I didn't always handle it right, but those are my choices I have to live with.” He spoke. She nodded. “And this one is on me. Now it's my turn to live with it.” She sighed sitting down.

Mickey looked at his broken sister. So many things he wanted to do and all of them conflicted the other. He wanted to yell at her, he wanted to hug her, smack her, tell her it was alright, that he still loved her, tell her he hated her. She shook his head. Too much shit. “Mandy, I love you, for what you did for me. I called you crying and you came back for me, as much as you didn't want to, you came back for me, and I'll never forget that.” Ian started. “But this thing we have been doing the last 10 years has to stop. I'm it a child and you are not my caretaker. It's true for a time I needed that. I may not need you to take care of me anymore but I need my friend back Mandy. I need the person I used to laugh with and do stupid shit with, not the Mandy who hides things from me because she thinks I can't handle life.” He finished finally. By this time Mandy was fully crying. “But..what if I don't know how to not worry about you anymore?” She said. “Then worry less, I'm not saying to stop all together. I worry about you, I worry about svet and Yev and Fiona, lip, Carl, Debbie, Liam, I worry about Mickey. That's what family does, but it's not healthy to worry yourself sick like that. You don't have to watch me like a hawk, if I show signs that you recognize or I stop going to work, or I do reckless stupid shot, call me out, I expect that shit but I need to be able to live, I have been actively not living for 10 years, and I'm done with that. I'm not dead yet, and I'm not going to keep acting like I am.” She nodded. 

“You take care of him okay?” She said quietly looking at her brother. Mickey smiled. “Mandy, I love you but it's not about that right now. Truth, yes I will willingly set here and say that I would love nothing more than to pretend there isn't shit to work out here but I'd be lying, but that's mine and ians shit. If I ever think that our relationship or whatever is in any way becoming a problem to his health, we figure out another way.” She nodded. Ian noticed that he didn't say he'd walk away from it, just fine another way and that made him smile. “Mandy, we have been a team for a long time, I don't want that to change but I also can't have you lying to me, it's not good for me to be paranoid about shit like that, I need to trust my best friend.” She nodded again, “I'm so sorry, I'm sorry I did that, I'm sorry I didn't try harder, I love you both so much. They smiled at her. “Now if you'll excuse us, we are extremely late for work, and those fuckers already think I'm stalking Ian.” Mickey grunted, causing both ian and Mandy to erupt in laughter. 

When they got to the site, the guys bearly looked up. No laughing or jokes. They kept their heads down and continued working. At first Mickey was confused until he saw Alan Greene step out of Ian's office. He sighed, great, now he was not only late and strolling in with his boyfriend? Lover? Boss? Fuck. Ian didn't look worried somehow and just smiled at the man. “I trust everything went well?” He directed his question to Ian. “Yes, sir. Thank you for handling things.” He nodded. “Anytime kid, milkovich, can I see you in the office before I go.” Mickey nodded nervously, hearing the light oohs behind him. “What did I say before boys?” He turned back. They put their heads down and continued working. 

Miley walked into the small trailer/office that Ian usually hid out in on a casino looking around. “You wanted to see me sir?” Mickey finally spoke. “Yes, sit down. I'm not that mean, you can stop figiting.” Mickey nodded. “You weren't here before to listen to my talk with the boys, so I'm going to give you my little talk one on one.” Mickey stared at him blankly. “Yeah , sorry about being late sir, it won't happen again.” He said. “Oh it's fine, ian explained this morning that you both had a situation to take care of. I trust your sister is doing better?” He nodded wondering what Ian had told him. “Good, I like that girl, she's been good to Ian, I suppose that has a little to do with you.” Mickey based again. “I suppose a little, they've been friends for a long time.” Mr. Greene nodded. “I'm aware, as have you and Ian been as I understand.” 

“Yeah I guess you could say that, we grew up together.” Mr Greene nodded again. “In more ways than one I'm sure.” He spoke honestly. “Sir?” He asked wondering where this was going, this conversation was seemingly more about his personal life than his job and it was making him nervous. “I didn't mean anything by that Mickey. Nor is it what I brought you in here for. As I told your co-workers earlier, this is a place of business and while I am not here all of the time because I trust that mr.gallagher has it under control, this is still a place of business. I annoy asking that we all turn into zombies and not speak to each other, what I am asking more from them than you I understand is that this place continue to be a productive one. Our personal lives, are just that personal.” Mickey nodded. “I never meant for my personal life to become an issue here sir.” He spoke. The man nodded. “Oh I know, and as far as I'm concerned, it isn't. If you and Ian want to see each other, I have no problem with that, in fact as a friend of Ian's, as a man who respects and is very proud of the man he has become, I fully support that, as long as it doesn't interfere with my buisness.” Mickey nodded. “I'm sure we understand what I am trying to say, as well as I hope your co-workers got the message as well.” Mickey nodded again. 

Ian looked back as Mickey walked away and looked Mack at the men in front of him. Jared looked up but didn't say anything. “Have something to say?” Ian asked smirking. “No sir. Nothing work related.” He sighed. Ian laughed. “Alright, fine. This is what I'll do. You all have exactly five minutes to ask me whatever you need to. And then the subject is dropped, I am not asking that you never mention or give each other shit for whatever, but latley it seems as if gossiping like a bunch of schoolgirls has been the main focus. Mr.greene noticed it in quotas not being met and I have noticed it everytime I have to come out here to break up whatever conversation is going on. Conversations about my personal life.” Ian eyed Jared who nodded. “No, it's your personal life, it's none of our buisness, as your employees.” Jared eyed the boys who almost spoke. “I only have the one question.” Ian nodded. “Go ahead.” Jared nodded. “Look man, I know shits been rough and shit, so is this something as a friend I should be worried about? Like before?” Ian understood. Jared had obviously figured out that Mickey was his ex, hard not to, it was pretty obvious. “Everything's good man. "

\------------------------------------------------

Ian finally made it home to the apartment, he was exhausted. after work and meetings and an extremely long session with his therapist. He sat down on the couch and sighed just laying there. “Hey.” He heard from behind him and he jumped up. “Mickey? What the hell Man, you scared the shit out of me.” Mickey laughed. “You look like shit, you okay?” Ian shrugged. “Therapy takes a lot out of me.” He stated. Mickey nodded slowly. "Need anything?" Mickey asked gently. "Yell at me?" Ian asked. Mickey looked up at him curiously. "What did you just say?" 

"Yell at me mick, you've been so nice, I told you everything I went through, it's your turn. Tell me how badly I fucked us up. I need to hear all of it. I can't fix this, I mean really fix this, unless you do." Mickey sighed. "We're fine Ian." he spoke. " Liar. We are not, we are better than we were, we are fucked up in so many ways, and that has so many reasons for it, but I need this." Mickey nodded sitting silent for a minute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to update, I got blocked after the mandy part, and went on a shameless watching bender for my weekend. -shrugs- hope you like.


	8. Mickey melt Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey let's put some emotions

Chapter 8:

 

  
Ian sat in silence watching Mickey pace. “Are you sure? I mean what's the point, it's over, were better.” Mickey rambled a little. “Yes Mickey, I need to hear it. I want this, I want us but if we move on without dealing with this. Then it's going to bite us in the ass later. I can't do that.” Mickey nodded. “I know it's hard for you, expressing shit, I know that but try for me okay?” Mickey nodded again. “From the beginning…”Mickey looked up to wait for Ian to nod. “I, umm, in the beginning you scared me, you were always so confident, collected. You knew who you were and you didn't make any excuses for it. It's why I was so attracted to you in the first place. I struggled for so long, and finally I let it all out, when I can out for you. And I was happy, I didn't think that was possible you know, to be out and feel happy like that.” Ian sat in silence nodding along and smiling lightly.   
Mickey breathed in again. “When you got sick, I should have done it differently, I should have let them take you to the hospital, but I didn't know. I thought if I loved you enough, I could take care of you and we'd be fine. I was wrong, it wasn't something I could love away, no matter how much I wanted to.” Mickey watched as Ian hung his head for a minute. “I'm sorry I out you through that.” He whispered. “That's not your fault. You were sick, for the first time, it was my job to take care of you. You had done everything for me, it was my turn Ian, and I failed you. When I finally realized how bad it was, I knew I had to get you help, especially when you took off with Yev. I was so terrified.” Ian nodded again. “Seeing you in there. That place. It killed me ian, and I don't know how we lost us after that but we did. I often wonder if there was a way that I could of made you believe that I loved you still that day.”

 

  
Ian felt the tears welling up inside of him. When he had stood on the steps and said goodbye to Mickey he had bearly felt anything. Today he was feeling all of it, just like he knew it would. It was killing him. “When you said, you didn't need to be fixed, I didn't understand it, but I get it better now. You have plenty of people trying to take care of you, telling you what to do, you needed more from me, a different kind of care. I was too scared to see that. I'll regret that for as long as I live.” He hung his head for a minute. Ian almost stopped him, almost pulled him into his arms, but he didn’t.

 

  
“When I saw you in that prison. All I wanted was to see some hope in those eyes. To see what I always had in your eyes but it wasn't there, there was sadness and something else I couldn't put my finger on. But it was over, even as I begged you to tell me you'd wait, I knew you wouldn’t. I went back to my cell after that, broken. I didn't cry though, told myself I wouldn't. I didn't cry for three days. The beating I took for those tears I bearly felt over the pain of losing you.” Ian was fully crying now. Mickey placed his hands on his loves face and knelt down. “You want me to stop?” Ian shook his head.

 

  
“It didn't take too long until the anger set in. I became so angry. At me, at you, at my father, Mandy, svet, every thing that has ever prevented us from being us. I hated all of it. It became easier to do any jobs svet had for me though, for a while until she decided to go legit.” Ian nodded. “You have something to do with that Gallagher?” Mickey asked. Ian shrugged. “We made an agreement of sorts, nothing too extreme.”

  
“So I heard about you, And your boyfriend. Fucking ripped my heart out again. The anger got worse, the fighting worse. I mean, how could you, with him. How could you betray me and hurt me again? I knew you were lying about waiting, but you couldn't have waited a little longer. Just like that you were completely fine, and I was in hell.” Ian nodded again. It was all he could seem to do besides cry. “When you visited me, I was so pissed off still. The anger was there for so long, I blew up at you, I said things that I shouldn't have said, I was so fucking angry. As soon as you walked out I knew I shouldn't have said them. I wanted you to come back but I knew you wouldn't, not for a long time anyway. I wrote the letter after that, had to re-write it a few times.” Ian sighed. “I wish I would have saw that.” Mickey nodded.

“Me too because I thought you did. I assumed you never opened it or did and just didn't care. That made me angry again. Eventually I decided, that enough was enough, if you didn't love me, if you didn't fucking care after everything, the. I wasn't going to either. I didn't even ask what happened to you when Mandy came to the prison three years ago. She was obviously upset and she mentioned you went off you meds but instead of listening and asking I cut her off, told her to never mention your name to me again, or I'd cut her out of my life.” Mickey was crying now. “My biggest regret. I don't even know you were in the hospital, fighting for your life, because of me. How could you? How could you do that? I can't live in a world without you in it, didn’t you know that?” Mickey finished collapsing in front of Ian. Both sobbing.   
Ian finally managed the strength to reach down and stroke the side of mickeys face, the way that Mickey used to do to him. Mickey finally looked up. “I know Mickey, more than anything I know.” Ian soothed him. “How to we do this? We have both spent the last ten years in hell, how do we step over that?” Mickey asked honestly for the first time. Ian knew that having this conversation would break open that piece of Mickey pretending that his own pain didn't matter. This could very well destroy them, but as he had discussed with his therapist, it was something unavoidable. He was so scared he had just broken any hope of ever getting Mickey back.

  
Mickey sat in silence as Ian tried to comfort him. He wanted to react, tell Ian he would be fine, but he couldn't promise that. He had just opened every wound he swore he never would. He could barely move, he froze when he felt Ian move his hand. Mickey abruptly looked in the direction where Ian was. Ian had pulled his knees up to his body and was looking at the wall. Mickey watched for a moment, wondering if he should say anything. How long had they been talking? He didn't want to panic, but the truth was he was and he hated that. He stared at ian for a long time before finally jumping up. "Ian." Nothing. "Ian, you can't fucking do this to me okay?!?" He screamed.

  
Ian jumped at the sound of Mickey screaming. wondering what had happened. Sure, he had zoned out for a second but now Mickey was on his feet, pacing, he was screaming about something, and he was hyperventilating. "You just can't okay, I had a moment, it was bound to happen, you asked for it, you cant go all silent on me like this, you can't break on me, this is why i didn't want to have this conversation and look at you all..." Ian jumped up as well, still confused, trying to stop mickey. "Hey!, hey calm down, What the hell happened, why are you freaking out Mickey?"

  
"Why am I freaking out? Im over here having a fucking meltdown, telling you everything I've ever felt for you and you just dissapear inside yourself, you curl up into a little ball, I called your name and you didn't even fucking hear me!" Mickey screamed. Ian stared at him for a minute. He saw the confusion and it only made him more scared, more angry. Fuck, he couldn't breathe. "Mickey, Fucking Breathe man. I'm sorry okay. I lose myself sometimes, I get quiet, my mind races, but it was only a few moments, it slows down, I come out of it." Ian seems to finally get what he had done. "But you, dropped your hand and you were still..."Mickey said shaking almost.

  
Ian sighed, there was still so much that Ian hadnt had a chance to discuss with Mickey about his bi-polar. Sure Mickey had seen completly off the rails Ian, and Newly medicated zombie, but he hadn't experienced any of the new stuff. He realized how scared Mickey must have been, thinking that Mickey's feelings had some how triggered Ian's disorder. He grabbed Mickey and forcefully pushed him down onto the couch. "I dropped my hand because I thought you might like a moment with your thoughts. I dazed out after that for a minute or something, it happens, ask your sister, even when we aren't having a serious conversation, I could be laughing and I'll just daze off, You didn't set me off, I'm not having a meltdown, Sure I'm sad because I hurt you, I want to punch myself in the face, I'll never beable to change that..."Ian sighed. "I'm sorry i ruined your moment, you should beable to get mad and upset without having to worry about what it's going to do to me." He hung his head.

  
"Not like I can stop that, but your okay?" Mickey watched Ian nod and sighed. "Well fuck, how often do you do that?" He asked curiously trying to prepare himself. "Not very often, really, it's not on a time table or anything, just every now and then." he shrugged lightly. "What...What does mandy do, when you do that?" He asked.

"She used to freak out and scream. Doesn't really do anything, so she started to calmly sit beside me and rub my back, sometimes she ignores me until I come out of it, depending on my mood beforehand." Mickey nods. "You said yelling doesn't help?" Mickey raises his eyebrows. "Not usually no, but for some reason, You yelling, scared like that , did. I'm not really sure about that. Maybe my mind responds to you as much as my body does." he smirked.

  
"Fuck off." Mickey finally laughed. "Okay, are we done with this heavy shit Gallagher, if you don't mind, I need a fucking nap now." Ian laughed and nodded. "You want to stay here, or would you rather go home?" Ian asked sadly. Afraid of the answer. "Oh like I'm leaving after that shit. come on, let's sleep, and if you so much as move away from me, I'm throwing a bucket of water on your ass." Mickey said jokinly but at the same time eyeing Ian.

  
Ian watched Mickey sleep for a while. He couldn't help it, watching as his body struggled and finally relaxed. He sighed. He couldn't help but think of all the shit he had put this man through. The Mickey he knew I the beginning was hard as nails, mean and strong, and because of him he had shattered down those walls and Ian had shattered the inside as well. He wondered how he could do that again, being all this shot and chaos back into his life. He was startled suddenly by the whispers of Mickey. “What are the signs?” An looked at him in the darkness, confused. “What?” He asked gently stroking the back of mickeys head, just to let him know he was still there. Mickey turned to look at him. “Last time, I was always looking for it, I became overbearing, I don't want to do that again, to lose you, to make you feel like I'm acting more like a parent than a lover.but to beagle to do that, to do this, I need to know if something is off. You told me what it was like when it was at its worst. But you had been off your meds for weeks before anyone noticed. Even Mandy who has spent everyday with you, I don't know, I just need to know. I don't want to be looking over my shoulder just because you have a moment or need some time.” Ian nodded at him. “okay mick, I'll tell you everything I know.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah there it is. Watching shameless and writing it is all consuming. Please in all that is holy, let there be atleast one future episode that gives me the feels that seasons 2,3, and 4 have latley.


	9. Break me down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey breaks down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading, and especially reviewing. Sorry it took so long, I've been having some serious block issues with both of my fics as of late.

Chapter 9: 

Mickey traced his hand along Ian's scar. Shuttering at the thought of Ian cutting the skin open. He felt the tears coming to his eyes. He had tried to sleep but the nightmares came, flashes of Ian lying there blood surrounding him. He didn't have to see it, to imagine it over and over again. He slowly slipped out of the bed and went out to the balcony. He sat in silence crying, no matter how much he knew Ian was there, he was fine, alive and doing everything he could to show him how much he loved him, it didn't matter because ever since he heard the words “you almost died.” Come out of his sisters mouth, it haunted him. He tried to not let it, tried to move on from it but how could he?  
I can hold my breath  
I can bite my tongue  
I can stay awake for days  
If that's what you want  
Be your number one  
I can fake a smile  
I can force a laugh  
I can dance and play the part  
If that's what you ask  
Give you all I am

Ian stood in the dark corner of the living room watching Mickey sobbing on the balcony. He lightly closed his eyes. His heart aching, he wanted to run out there, hold Mickey but he gave it some time, Mickey needed this, he knew that, it didn't stop it from killing him. He had done this, by breaking all of the promises he had ever made, by not taking care of himself, by not being the man that Mickey needed him to be. Well he was done with that. Mickey deserved the man he fell in love with, a better man. 

But I'm only human  
And I bleed when I fall down  
I'm only human  
And I crash and I break down  
Your words in my head, knives in my heart  
You build me up and then I fall apart  
'Cause I'm only human

Mickey finally breathed in and out. The sobs were quieting and he sighed in relief. He froze for a second when he felt the strong arms wrap him up from behind. He felt the breath on his neck as Ian's lips came down to place a kiss on his neck. “Hey.” Mickey spoke silently. Ian didn't speak, he just wrapped himself tighter around Mickey. Suddenly Ian gruffly turned Mickey to face him. Mickey tried to turn his tear stained face away from Ian as if he could hide it. Ian shook his head trailing his hand on mickeys face. Bringing his lips to kiss mickeys face where the tears had once been. Ian grabbed the edge of mickeys shirt and pulled it over mickeys head. “What are you…?” Ian shook his head again, bringing his hand up to trail the tattoo on mickeys chest. Lightly and lovingly staring. At it as he did so.  
Ian smiled at the man that he loved more than his own life.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------

Mickey woke up to an empty bed beside him. He sighed, knowing full well that Ian had already left the apartment. Mickey was off today but Ian wasn't and he knew that it was time to get his lazy ass up out of bed and make his way back to the apartment he paid to live in. One that he hadn't been spending much time in latley. Between time with Ian and work, he really hadn't made it back there but he just wanted another few moments in Ian's bed before he made his way back. he heard his phone ring and went to pick it up.  
"Yeah?" He said not even bothering to look at the phone. "Hey Mick, You know where Ian is?" She asked almost nervously. "Um..At work?" It sounded more like a question instead of a statement and he knew that. "No, he isn't there, I've called him a million times, I've called everywhere." he could hear the panic in her voice. "Mandy, what is it?" She hesitated on the line for a minute. "It's...umm, fuck. It's Monica. She is currently passed out on my floor, I don't even know how she got in here Mickey. I tried calling everyone. Finally got ahold of Lip like five minutes ago. I called the perimedics. I just can't find Ian, and I'm kind of worried now, what if he was with her last night or something. Fuck." She ramblled into the phone. "Okay Mandy, calm down, he wasn't with her, atleast not before like 4am, because I was here with him, He was supposed to have a meeting this morning, let me try him okay?"  
"yeah Okay." 

Mickey listened to the ringing phone on the other end. He was slowly losing his confidence that Ian was fine. He had been sure of it when had talked to Mandy, that whatever happened to Monica, hadn't happened to Ian, he wouldn't just run off like that after last night. But now with the deafening ringing in his ear, he just kept praying for an answer. He tried to remember all the details about the meeting that Ian had this morning but he couldn't. He finally searched his phone for his bosses number. It wasn't his personal number like he knew Ian had, but atleast it would get a message to him. Or something. Anything. He waited until finally someone answered the phone. 

“Umm yeah is Mr.greene in today?” He tapped his fingers impatiently pulling his jacket on. “No, he's out of the office today, may I take a message?” The woman asked sweetly sounding a little concerned. “Yeah, tell him it's Mickey Milkovich, and let him know it's concerning Ian Gallagher. We both work for him.” He said nervously. “Oh alright sure thing. Sir?” He nodded at first. “Oh yeah, sorry.” He answered. “Did you need to speak to Mr.gallagher too? He is here.” Mickey froze. “He is?” He questioned sighing in relief, “yeah, he's in a meeting right now, but they should be coming to a stopping point. I can get him for you.” He nodded again feeling frustrated. “Yeah, um just tell him I'm on my way up there, to meet me Outside.” He said. “Sure thing. Have a great day sir.” And he hung up. He could finally breathe again. Ian was fine. He was in his meeting, and he was fine. He repeated that to himself as he made his way to the tall office building. 

 

Ian looked up from the table as the door opened. The men got up and shook his hand handing him the contracts that they had just signed. Lauren, Mr.Greene’s secretary was standing there. “Hey, we're finished here, checking up on me?” He joked. She shook her head. “Sir, a Mr. Milkovich called a moment ago, he sounded pretty frantic, said he would be here soon to meet you outside.” He looked at her feeling a little worried himself. Why was Mickey coming here. Had something happened? He nodded at her and started to get up pulling his phone out of his pocket. Missed calls from Mandy, Fiona, lip, Debbie, Carl, and Mickey. What the hell was going on? He started walking to the elevator pulling up his voicemails. 

“Hey Ian, it's Mandy, I've called a few times, I know you don't want me to get all worried and shit but um can you call me back please. Kind of freaking out.”  
“Okay buddy, I love you and all but you can't go disappearing and shit, especially not with Monica all, what!?! Well she is, fine. Just call me already okay.” He heard lip, he sounded like he had been cut off, was sounded like Mandy in the background hushing him from mentioning their mother. 

He made his way outside still listening. Now it was Debbie and she was freaking out, he couldn't even understand her words. He did make out Monica, bi-polar, hospital. He finally looked up to see Mickey standing by the street pacing. “Mick? What the fuck is going on? I'm not even through all these voicemails. Did my family call you?” He asked. “Umm, well Mandy did, she couldn't find you, she was freaking out.” He watched as the man ran his fingers through his hair. “Seems like she isn't the only one, got everyone pretty riled up, including you it seems. I can't answer my phone when I'm in a meeting like that. I'm guessing you knew that since you called up here to find me.” Ian stated. 

Mickey shook his head. “Umm, I called to find your boss, to um see if he knew where your meeting was, I forgot the details, I was distracted last night. Anyway, Mandy woke up this morning and Monica was passed out on the floor. She doesn't know how she got in or when she got there. So she tried calling you to see if you were with her and shit.” Ian nodded. “So, umm yeah she freaked out and called everyone and then me, I told her you were with me and had a meeting but it didn't help. I was sure you were fine, well atleast until I wasn't, and well I know it freaks you out, when we all get like this, I'm sorry I just couldn't help but imagine, fuck.” Mickey kept rambling and when he finally looked up Ian was smiling at him. “What?” Mickey let out.

Ian didn't say anything, he just pulled Mickey to him and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around the mans body and kissed him feverishly, not caring who was walking by or seen them. “The fuck was that for?” Mickey asked. “You. Just you being you. Everyone else is running around calling me and hospitals and thinking I'm exactly like Monica, and you instead, called here and came here. You may have been scared, but you did exactly what I would want you to do. You made sure I was where I was supposed to be first. I'm sorry, so sorry that I ever doubted your love for me back then. I'm so sorry that I scared you and hurt you.” Mickey nodded. “Okay, you want to go check on your mom?” Ian shrugged at him. “Yeah, guess I should find out what happened.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is. Thank you again. I'm going to try to update this again in a few days. :) I'm actively avoiding watching season 6 at the moment. Lol. Got past the prison scene and turned it off. Everytime I watch that it breaks my heart and I end up writing or reading fics to make me feel better. Lol. Much love


	10. Hurricane Monica

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ian visits Monica, can he face the fears of his own fate?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was a little hard for me to write. I didn't know what I was going to do with this for a while. Let me know what you think.

Chapter 10: 

Mickey watched Ian pace not knowing really what to say. What was there to say really, Monica, once again, had managed to ruin a hell of a lot more than she didn't. He knew that Ian was torn between wanting to be here to make sure his mother was still alive but he knew that being here meant he was being pulled into something that he couldn't stand, the fears of being like Monica, Mickey didn't have to ask to know that, no matter how great Ian was doing now, no matter, the truth was, it would always be there. How do you tell the man otherwise, how to convince Ian that no matter what, he would never be like her, he would never be the burden that Monica was to them. 

Ian slowly walked to the room Monica was in. Doctors said she OD’d, had to have her stomach pumped, she also had tried to hurt herself again, she missed whatever vein she was going for or whatever, didn't change the fact that she had bled on his fucking carpet, in front of his best friend. It didn't can get anything she had done, he wondered to himself how people did this. How did Mandy handle it when he was like this, how? Because Mandy still loved him, never told him what a fuck up he was, she never acted like there was anything he could do to make her want him gone and yet everything Monica did make him want to run away. Every last thing. Were they stronger than him, being able to deal with him better than he could deal with his own mother?   
He didn't say a word as he stared down at her, she looked so weak, so distant. He knew they had started her on meds again, he could see it In her eyes, they way she stared at the wall, the same way he used to stare in the mirror everytime he had went back on his meds. He almost felt sorry for her, nobody would understand that, the understanding he held for his mother. She finally saw him looking up and back away again, they didn't speak for the longest time. He just walked slowly into the room and stared at her, her face held so many things that he understood, he remembered all too well what it was like to be lying in that bed. To be the one everyone looked at like he was sure he was looking at her right now. “I'm sorry.” She finally choked out. 

He didn't say anything at first. What was there to say? Did he tell her he forgave her for going crazy and breaking into his apartment, for her bender, for the scar that was sure to be under the bandage on her arm? Did he tell her he understood because not too far in the distant past, he had done something like this, except he hadn't missed, he had almost died? Was he supposed to scream at her to get on meds. To save her life, to stop living in this dispair? Or did he say nothing and walk out like she didn't matter? He should, that's what his family would have done, they had all written her off years ago, the negligent mother with no regard for anyone but herself, but could be so that? What if they did that to him one day? “What happened?” He asked sounding unsure of himself. It sounded stupid, he knew what happened, atleast basically. She looked down not saying anything for a minute.   
“I'm not sure. I'm never really sure.” She said and he knew that was true. He hung his head down before looking back at her.   
“Been there.” He said honestly and she nodded. She didn't say anything more and he didn't either, he held out his hand and she placed hers in his, he felt the tears stinging his eyes as he watched her cry. He suddenly understood something more than he ever did before. The way Mickey looked at him when he was sick, the way Mandy looked at him everyday since she had been the one crying and holding his hand in the hospital. That's the thing about this disease, sometimes you don't see shit that is so fuckin obvious to anyone else. There were still times he stared at his pills wondering what it would feel like to throw them all out. He wondered what it was like for her, living with this for so long, he wanted to ask her about the first time. He moved his hand to touch her face. 

Mickey stood in the hallway letting Ian have his moment with his mother, Mandy was pacing in the waiting room and the Gallaghers were there by now, fighting with each other, they had just noticed that Ian had slipped past them, they got distracted that way, too many of them fuckers. Fiona and lip started barging down the hall toward him and Mickey stepped forward. “What are you doing Mickey, I'm going in there, he doesn't need this shit.” Fiona yelled at him. Mickey shook his head, crossing his arms.   
“He needs the exact opposite of what you think he does, what do you think it's like for him? Living with this shit, he needs to feel it, to be there with it.” He said simply.   
“How would you know what he needs? You've been gone for years, you weren't here okay! He's fragile and anything can set him off. Seeing Monica is one of those things!” Lip yelled from beside his sister. 

Mickey shook his head wildly. “I didn't have to be here, I know him. I know how that brain works. Do you? You don't know what it's like, none of us do. We know what it's like to watch him spin out of control, sure. You also know what it feels like to watch her do the same. Shes not just his mother, she's his fucking fear. Until he faces her and what the fuck that means, it's never going to be over, so let him be. If I'm wrong and he spins out, I'll lock him in a damn padded cell myself okay?” He said frustrated. 

“Damn Mick, when did you get all smart and shit?” He heard Debbie say from behind her siblings. He smiled at her. He hadn’t seen the gallaghers since he'd been out and it was good to see them, all aged and shit. 

He turned back around to look at the door that Ian was behind, getting closer to the door to make sure he was okay. Just because he knew that Ian needed to do this, didn't change that it scared the shut out of him, even more than it did Fiona and lip. He didn't go in, he just watched. He watched Ian wipe a tear away, and he watched Monica nod at whatever he said to her before Ian finally got up and walked out. Ian didn't say anything when he walked out just smiled lightly and hugged Mickey. Mickey pulled on a sharp breath preparing himself for the argument he was about to get from the man. He turned to open the door and Ian stopped him. “What are you doing mick?” He asked. 

“I'm going in there, there's something I need to say.” Ian shook his head furiously. “look, you did what you had to do, and it's my turn okay? This is just something I need to do. I promise I'm not going to hurt her or anything okay?” Ian sighed before nodding, looking like he wanted to drag Mickey out of there and not look back. 

Mickey made it to her bedside, Monica looking up at him, not saying a word. “Do you know who I am?” She nodded. “Good, because I don't have time to explain that, I have maybe 5 minutes at the most before they barge in here. I have sort of a reputation.” He said with a dry laugh. “Look, I'm not stupid, I know what's going to happen here, your family is going to come in here, even though they are going to act like they couldn't give a shit, your still their mother, and your going to make them a bunch of bullshit promises about meds and the like and your going to leave here and maybe even take your meds for a day or so, then it's going to all go back to what it is. Your going to run off and do what you do. Then next time, if you don't succeed in offing yourself were all going to be back here, nobody acting like they give a damn but Ian and he does, give a damn.” He took a breath and she nodded as if she knew he needed her to not say anything yet. 

“He cares not only because you’re his mother, but because he sees himself when he looks at you. He is the only person in this damn world that even attempts to understand you. He needs you to try. He knows what it's like to fall apart, he understands it, he needs you damn it, and he will never admit that because he has spent his entire life trying to not need you. He needs to understand you, he needs to ask you questions that allow him to understand himself, he needs hope that he isn't destined to end up like this, that he can do what he needs to do and survive, and be fucking happy, you owe him that. If you can't give him that, if you can't then don't come back, because this shit, right here is going to kill him and I won't let you do that to him anymore. He's better than that, he's been on his meds for three years. He's doing good, really good, and I love that man, more than I love my own life.” He said finishing his speech to the woman who was openly crying now. 

“Get me the doctor.” She said simply. He looked at her confused. That was it. Great, she was probably going to tell the doctors he attacked her or some shit.

Ian paced outside the door, Mandy by his side, occasionally she would look over at Lip with a heavy sigh but other than that she just held onto him, as worried as he was about what her brother was in there saying. When Mickey exited the room he let out a breath that he had been holding. “Ready to go?” He asked hopefully. Mickey shook his head, gave him a kiss on the cheek and walked past him , motioning for him to hold on for a second. A minute later he came back with a doctor who was holding a file. Ian eyed the man. 

“What did you do?” He asked sternly peaking his head around just to make sure his mother was still in there, breathing and shit. She was. She was sitting up, waiting for the doctor. He watched as she talked to the doctor although he couldn't make out what she was saying. “I'm going to ask again mick, what did you do? And is it something that we need to run the fuck outta here for?” He said worriedly. Mick shrugged. 

“I didn't touch her, I said some shit, she listened. That's all.” Mick answered him. He waited for the doctor to walk out and ask him instead. “What's going on with my mother?” He asked frantically. 

“Your mother is being transferred.” He said simply like that answered a damn thing. When he noticed Ian waiting for more he sighed. “She is being transferred to a treatment facility.” Then he walked away. 

“She what!?” Ian looked at Mickey. “What does that even mean Mickey?” Mickey shrugged, sighing in relief. So Ian marched into her room, with anger and confusion a she didn't know what else. She lightly looked up at him. “What is going on?” He asked her, closing the door from prying ears. 

“I am going to get some help. I signed the papers, no getting out of it now, probably won't work, but I'll try.” She said simply. What the actual fuck? 

“When did you decide that?” He asked, she shrugged. 

“At some point while your boyfriend was yammering on, he's a real talker.” She said. 

“He's actually not, never has been.” He said truthfully. 

“Well he must really love you then. I was wrong before. What I said to you about him never understanding like the others. I think he does, as much as someone can who doesn't feel the things that we do.” She said sadly. “Take care of that one, because he's one of the ones that won't leave because your different, trust me, I know these things” 

And Ian smiled at her and walked out, searching for his …boyfriend? He walked down the hall, his siblings still standing there, he wasn't sure if they were waiting to go lecture Monica or merely just checking to see if he had boarded the crazy train to Monica land. Mandy was standing uncomfortably next to lip not saying anything to him. And Mickey was, well where did he go? Mandy looked up. “He went outside, probably to smoke, you ready?” She asked. He nodded at her. 

“Let's get the fuck outta here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to separate the dialogue better as requested however, I don't think I did a very good job at it. I'll try again. Back to reading mercifully until I get inspired. ;)


	11. Moving Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Moving forward into the next chapter can be so much more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a long to write, I am sorry about that. I keep having to re-read. Hope this doesn't feel too rushed. I think this one is wrapping up soon. :)

Chapter 11: 

Ian sighed as he sifted through paperwork. this was the last thing he wanted to be doing right now. Right at this fucking moment, he wanted to go outside and pull Mickey inside with him and show him just how useful this little office of his could be, it was getting ridiculous. It's all he thought about, all he had been thinking about all day. Honestly all he ever thought about in all the moments of quiet was Mickey. He finally got up from his desk to look outside, it looked like most of the guys were heading out for the day and he watched from the window as they all pulled away. 

Mickey looked around for a minute staring towards the office. Ian hadn't come out of there all day, he was actually a little nervous about it. Ian usually came it to check on them, but he was distant today,barely speaking, Mickey wondered how much of that had to do with Monica, how he was holding up. He hadnt spend the night with Ian the previous night, just a few phone calls and Ian seemed pretty out of it, in fact since they left the hospital a week ago, he hadn't quite known what to say to the man. Mickey sighed deciding to bite the bullet and go and speak to Ian. He didn't know if he could stand another night of phone calls and not being next to Ian after everything.

He slowly walked towards the office, taking it in. Breathing out a breath he wasn't completely aware he was holding as he knocked on the door. He expected a distracted invitation in but what he got was the door swinging open causing him to jump back. “Fuck gall…” He was cut off by Ian pulling him into the office and looking outside for any observers once Ian seemed satisfied he slammed the door shut and practically slammed Mickey back into the wall. “What the fuck?!” Mickey yelped in surprise. His confusion was cut short by the lips that crashed down onto his.

Ian ran his hands up mickeys body out of need. He needed mickey, he had been avoiding that need, keeping conversations light trying not to show Mickey just how desperate he was for his touch, just for Mickey to look at him like he needed him too. It wasn't exactly the most stable feeling and Ian had learned anything in his life it was that feeling off balance was dangerous for people like him. Mickey pulled at Ian hungrily answering ians need with his own. “Fuck…Ian.” He groaned out. 

“Need you, mick.” Ian managed 

"Gallagher, mmm, Here?" He asked taking in the site of Ian.   
"Yes, Now!" Ian shuttered 

Mickey didn't hesitate, flashes of every time they had ever touched spilling into his brain, flashes of that night that he barely remembered.   
"Want to remember every inch of you Mickey. Every fucking Inch." Ian breathed out trailing kisses down Mickeys Collar. He traced his hands up and down the mans body finally pulling Mickey's shirt over his head, taking in a breath, that tattoo, every fucking time, it did something to him, it was a declaration that when he first laid eyes on it, meant nowhere as much as it did every time after. he traced his fingers on it once again, like he had so many times since Mickey had come back into his life. he needed this, so much. 

Mickey sucked in a breath, feeling impatient. He grasped for ian unbottoning Ians shirt, carefully, strategically. He licked his lips as he trailed kissed down ian's chest. Fumbling with his belt, slowly pulling it off of him. He knealed down onto his knees. "Mick..." 

"Shh. Let me take care of you. Okay?" Ian just nodded.   
Mickey pulled down Ians dress pants looking up with hooded eyes at the man he had loved for half of his life, a man that he once thought he would spend the rest of his life with, the man shortly after that he thought he would never see again, but life had other plans. He licked the tip of Ian before taking him fully into his mouth. He Heard Ian Moan and no matter how many times he heard it over his lifetime, everytime was like the first time, it did something to him. That moan that he caused, that he had been getting out of Ian since they were teenagers, it was everything, it always would be. 

"Fuuuck, Mick. I need...Fuck...Inside..Fuck...You..." He stammered out. Mickey bobbed for a minute longer making his way back to kiss Ian's lips. 

"You want to be in me Firecrotch?" He quirked an eyebrow. Ian just nodded. Mickey pulled his clothes off and sat himself on Ian's desk. "Right here? You want to take me right here?" He asked. Ian didnt say a word he just crashed into him, kissing him feverishly. It was everything.   
Ian sighed thinking for a minute. contemplating when mickey placed lube into his hand. "Fucking now!" he said impatiently. Ian nodded. slicking up his fingers and slowly inching one into the love of his life. It didn't take long before he placed two and then three. By this time, Mickey was panting, every motion getting him closer to coming undone. Finally, Ian leaned down to kiss him deeply as he slowly entered him. "God, yes." he let out.   
The moans of Mickey Milkovich had always been ian's undoing, since the first time until the very last, every single time they tore him in a way that no one ever could. So intoxicating. He feverishly, fucked Mickey until they were both crying out in complete ectacy. 

"Fuck Gallagher. I don't think it's possible to ever get enough of you. How the fuck did I survive." 

"Fuck if I know, Because I sure the hell didn't. If what I have been doing the last 10 years is surviving, I don't want any part of it." He breathed out. Mickey chuckled. 

"Mick?"   
"Yes Ian? You gonna get all fucking romantic on me now?"   
"Yup"   
"Fuck."   
"Mmhmm. Mickey. I want you. Now just here, like this, like for fucking real. I dont know what we're doing, but I'm fucking Yours, even if you don't want it. I'm fucking yours." 

Mickey leaned up and kissed Ian.   
"Never stopped being yours" Mickey spoke simply. 

\--------------------------------------------

Family dinner that evening was awkward and amazing. They all gathered, Yev was especially excited that once again, Uncle Ian had showed up, as well as his father. It was easy to see how excited he was that they were all together. Ian sat and listened intently to Yevgeny tell him about his upcoming birthday party that he wanted. He nodded smiling looking over at mickey beaming at him. "Ian?" Svetlana spoke up looking at him.

"Yeah, Lana?" He said barely paying attention.   
"Are...Are you gonna take house back?" she asked seemingly nervous. Mickey snapped his head back confused.   
"No, lana, why the fuck would I do that, this is your home, Yevgeny's home. I would never do that, I'm paying it off, and it's yours." He said.   
"But, You gave it to me because...You thought you could never...You know and now, maybe things are different." She said looking back and forth between mickey and Ian. Ian sighed.   
"Svetlana, This is your home. Sure when I first found it, I had dreams for it, but you and Yevgeny have filled this house with so much more than I could ever hoped for okay? Someday maybe I'll look for another house or whatever, make my own home, but this will always be your home as long as you want it okay?" She just nodded.   
"What was that?" Mickey asked.   
"What do you mean?" Ian responded.   
"Svet, freaking out like that, not like her, why would she think?" he glares needing to know what he was missing.   
"I umm....I, when I got this house, I had a dream for it, that's all, a future or something planned, when I decided that dream was never going to be happening, I offered it to Lana, She seems to think because me and you aren't killing eachother anymore that I might want to get that dream back." he answered. he no longer wanted to skirt around the past, if he was going to do this with Mickey, he was going to be real.

"You...This house...For me?" he asked curiously. 

"Mmmhmm" he said murmering, Yev had gotten up shortly before this to leave the two men alone. 

"So you don't want that dream back. You said you didn't want the house." he said sadly. 

"Not what I meant. I'm not the same man I was when I found this place, I am better I guess. I want all those things with you, every fucking one of them, just not here. This is Svetlana's house. It has been for a long time now. When I look for another house, I hope you are there with me, picking it out, yev too. I'm not stupid enough to think thats going to happen now, but when it does, it wont be me taking back a dream I once had, it will be me building a new one, with you." Ian smiled. 

"Fucking Gallagher." Mickey said shaking his head. 

"Okay shittheads, that's enough of that gooey shit. I love you, fucking completly and shit, but fucking cut it out." Mandy said laughing lightly walking into the room.   
\-------------------------------------------------

"Dude, fuckin christ, happened to you?" Jared asked mickey about a week later. 

"Fucking what now?" Mickey said rolling his eyes as he worked. the project was almost done. He would miss working here, it had been really good, especially the part about Ian. 

"Dude your fucking neck, the whole thing is fucking purple. Anybody ever told you to get that shit lower or something, fuck sakes." Jared shook his head. 

"Awe, whats wrong jared, you jellous? You want me to ask him to mark you up to? Im sure that can be arranged." He said wiggling his eyebrows. 

"Fucking gross man. I'm not even going to ask, I'm just going to pretend that You aren't fucking gallagher everytime you walk into that office." He said 

"Awe Jared, but you were so interested before. I thought we could fucking bond and shit. I could tell you all about how hard your boss fucks me...Again...and Again...and..." he laughed swiftly as jared covered his ears and started screaming. 

"NO!!!!" and Mickey doubled over clutching at his sides. 

"Fuck is going on out here?" He heard Alan Greene call out. Mickey promptly straighted up and got back to work. "Milkovich, Can I speak to you?" He said.   
"Ha, that's what you get for being discusting." Jared said. 

"Yes sir." Mickey said once they were away from the guys.   
The man eyed his neck and suddenly he became sheepish about it. Truth was, he had told Ian to stop doing that shit, but he wouldn't listen, just kept marking him up. Fucking asshole. " 

"Nice Artwork, No wonder Gallagher has been so fucking Zen latley." He said chuckling. Mickey didn't say anything just bowed his head down slightly. 

"Anyway, so the job is almost over, and I'd like to keep you around." He said simply.   
"Excuse me?" he asked eyeing the man.   
"Look, don't get me wrong, I love the construction company you work for, they hire lots of good men, and that's good enough for some of them, some of them even love it so much they would never imagine doing anything else, Jared being one of them, offered him some jobs over the years, always turns my ass down, but sometimes, I see something in some of you." he says. 

"Like with Ian?" he asks.   
The man chuckles. "Yes, like Ian. Saw something amazing in that kid, I was right too. he was much better suited for managing shit. I have something else in mind for you though. Not even related to my construction business." Mr.Greene said. 

"Like?" Mickey asked curiously.


	12. New beginning?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The job is over and a new one is on the horizon. A work party proves to have a turn Ian didn't expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on a mission to try and update all of my fics more often. :) sorry about the delay. Got a little caught up. Too many multi's at the same time. 
> 
> Much love

Chapter 12: 

“And then he offered me a job. Like a real fucking job.” Mickey says recounting some of his day to Ian.   
“Awesome. What did he offer? Are you gonna take it?” Ian asks  
“This is gonna sound so fucking weird okay? Because I don't even know what he's talking about. Said he found some of my drawings? Like umm, where the fuck did he find my architectural shit?” He asks eyeing Ian.   
“Umm. They were on my desk. Well not really, they were in a book, and then, well things got thrown around when we fucked on my desk.” He says laughing. “He fucking thought they were mine. I thought he was going to kill me for not telling him I had this secret talent, which by the way, I don't fucking have. I just brushed it off, said you drew them. I forgot all about it. Please don't hit me.” He says at the end giving a fake laugh. 

“Fuck would I hit you for? That fucking man just offered to let me work in a office of architects, and he also offered to pay for me to go back to school, but I don't know about that shit. I'm gonna work in an office though, and get paid real money. Like for real? Where did you find this man? Are you sure you never banged him?” Mickey rambles. Ian starts laughing. 

“No, I never banged him. He's not remotely interested in mine or anyone dick for that matter, he has a smokin hot wife, he's just actually a nice guy, I know we don't know much about people actually doing nice things for people, especially where we come from.” Ian says. Mickey nods. 

\--  
The job ended a few weeks later, the guys all going out for a typical night out. “Yo man, come out with us! It's like a tradition.” Jared says to Mickey. 

“I don't know. Maybe” Mickey says. 

“Bet you'll go if bossman goes. Hey Gallagher!!” Jared calls out who looks up as he walks out of his office. 

“What?” Ian says walking over. 

“You comin tonight. Tradition and shit?” He asks and Ian looks over at Mickey for a second and shrugs.   
“I might come out. If I have the time.” He says lightly.   
“Come on fuckers. Come drink with us. And stop looking at eachother like that.” Jared says shaking his head. 

“Oh we're definetely going now. And I will be looking at him like this all night. Just to piss you off.” Mickey smiles sarcastically. 

\--  
Ian sits at one end of the bar watching mickey, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. It was one thing to say it was fine to go hang out with the guys from work, and be…a couple but to act like it, Ian didn't want to press his luck. And besides…these were his employees as well. 

Mickey listened. Or didn't listen to whatever it was that Jared was saying, he instead glanced at Ian who seemed to be deep in thought, waiting for whatever he had ordered. Mickey contemplated whether he wanted to make a spectical, he was about to say fuck it, and just grab Ian, he saw mr.greene sit down next to him. Huh. He wasn't aware the bossman csm to these things. A lady was standing off to the side, she was quite pretty, even he could recognize that. She kept a few steps back as if she knew the men needed to talk, so Mickey decided to wait. Watching ians face turn sour. Well that couldn't be good.

\--

“Hey boy. Enjoying yourself?” The man asked. 

“Hey. Didn't know you were showing up. Hey Alaina.” Ian says to me.greenes wife. 

“Hello Ian. Good to see you. She says from her place and smiles at him.   
“What's going on? You look all serious. It's a party:” Ian says joking. 

“I suppose Mickey told you about his new job.”   
“Yeah. That was awesome of you. He'd excited.” He says.   
“Yeah. Look, um, you might not be when I tell you this. I found him a great job, but it's not..well he has to do his training at another company. One we work with quite often. The job I have for him isn't quite available, and I didn't really have much of a option in this, I hope you understand.” Me Greene says, almost too formal. 

“Okay. I'm sure that'll be fine.” Ian says wondering why he was having this conversation. It wasn't his job after all. 

“It's at Lyon architecture.” He says. There it was.   
“Seriously? That guys a …jerk.” He says.   
“I know you and Franklin have your issues..”   
“Issues. That guy is a homophobic prick and his son tried to..well ya know.” He says and the man nods.   
“I know. His son is out of town. For another few weeks, but I know you have an issue with the man. I do to, but I really didn't have an option here. With mickeys probation he really can't be unemployed for any amount of time, and this job wouldn't be official for another month or so. I just wanted to let you know.” Ian nods 

“Great. That should be a fun conversation. He gonna treat Mickey like shit when he finds out he's gay?” He asks. 

“No of course not. That would be illegal. His association with you might stir some issues. You did beat the hell out of his son, If you remember.” 

“He fucking roofied me.” Alan nods. 

“I'm aware. I'm just saying..” 

“Whatever. I'll deal with it. I don't know how but I will. I just got him back..god this sucks. Franklin and that prick better not fuck with him Alan. I swear.” He says sighing. 

“I know. I got someone to keep an eye out. One wrong move. You know I got your back.” And Ian nods.   
“Well fuck it then. I'm going to go enjoy my night.” Ian says and Alan nods. “Thanks for telling me.” 

“I'm sorry Ian. I'll try to get that position set up as fast as I can.” He says and Ian nods.   
“I know.” 

\--

Ian walks over to the rest of the guys and Mickey is eyeing him curiously. 

“Bossman not staying?” Jared asks nodding towards Alan and Alaina. 

“Nah. Just had some business to discuss.” Ian says. And Jared nods. Ian looks back over to Mickey, who is still eyeing him and Ian looks at him Intensely. “Fuck it.” He whispers and that causes Jared to look over at him and Ian walks up to Mickey and wraps his arms around mickeys waist. 

“Wha..” Mickey says in shock but is cut off by ians lips. Mickey stills for just a second but doesn't fight Ian he just kisses him back. “Damn Gallagher. What was that for?” Mickey smirks at him. And Ian shrugs: 

“I just really wanted to do that.” He says.   
“Well.you should want to do that more often. That was hot.” Mickey says. Earning snickers from behind him. 

Ian smiles at Mickey. “So what was that about? You looked pissed.” Mickey says.

“Nah, all good.” He lies

“Dude. Micks right. Somethings going on.” Jared says. 

“Um. Not a big deal. Alan was just filling me in on micks new job. Or whatever.” He says. And Mickey tilts his head. 

“You mean the training thing.” Ian nods. “Why you looked so pissed about it? It's cool right?”

“Yeah yeah.” He says. 

“Why'd he talk to you about it?” Mickey looks at Ian. “If I got this job because of…us…I'm not taking it.” 

“Not about that. It's, do we really have to talk about this now? Here.” Ian says. 

“Yes. Why would our boss talk to you about my new job. You aren't my boss anymore.” He folds his arms backing away from Ian. 

“I just..ugh.” Ian sighs. 

“Dude. He has a point. Kinda shitty. Where's the job?” Ian turns away slightly. 

“Lyons architecture.” Mickey says and Jareds eyes widen.   
“Oh….nevermind. Sorry man.” Jared says to Ian. “Boys, time to go. Over there. Away.”   
\--

“What the hell was that?” Mickey asks back at his apartment

“I'd really like to enjoy this night mick. Alan didn't tell me because of…he didn't hire you for me. That was all you. He told me about the training because he knows I don't like that prick you will be working for. He didn't want me to find out and freak out or something. It was a curtesy, to let me know he didn't have a choice okay.” 

“So? The guys an ass. I can handle it. You don't have to protect me.” 

“I kind of do. He can't…fuck. He shouldn't know about me. That you and I are..friendly.” 

“Friendly? Oh we're friends now? And I was just starting to believe..fuck Ian.” He shakes his head. 

“Not what I said or meant. Franklin Lyon is a certifiable homophobic class A, douchebag okay? He doesn't like me, in fact he hates me. I just don't want him making your life a living hell because of me. “ and Mickey eyed his boyfriend. 

“He do something to you?” 

“Personally no. He was a jerk, nothing I couldn't handle. Worked for him for a while once. Office assistant.” 

“But you sound like..it's more Ian. What is it?” 

“My fist collided with his sons face is all. My temper. “ Ian shrugs as if it's nothing.   
“That's it. Just your temper. You expect me to believe that?” 

“Yes.”

“You asking me to go back in the closet because this guys an asshole?” Mickey asks.

“Fuck no. Just probably best if I don't show my face there. That's all. Pretty sure I'm banned anyway. No big deal.” 

“I'm gonna drop this for tonight. Because I can tell that I'm not getting anything more out of you but don't think for a second that we aren't talking about this Gallagher. You don't just go around punching people in the face for no reason. That's more my thing.” Ian laughs as Mickey pulls him to him. 

“Now grumpy. Take your clothes off.” Mickey says.


	13. Jobs and assholes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey gets to know some guys at work

Wish you would 

Chapter 13:

Mickey liked architecture, he liked when a few of the guys he worked with would invite him over and show him some of their designs, even though his current job seemed to consist of being the boss’ bitch. Ian had been right about him being a jerk, in fact he didn't seem to like anyone much but he especially hated Mickey, he liked to push, see if Mickey would do something to warrant him getting rid of the boy but Mickey held back, it was only a few more weeks. Mr.Greene promised he'd have his real position open soon and then he could walk out of this hell hole but his asshole boss aside, he actually liked getting to know these people. They were nice, and would pull him over and teach him things when the jackass was out of the office or not looking. 

One of the interns, or whatever stopped by his desk. Jeremy. He seemed to be alright for a northsider spoiled brat. The boss seemed to adore the prick, so there was that. “Hey. Mickey right?” The guy says. 

“Mmhm.” Mickey replies half paying attention. He notices the guy who sits next to him put his head down.   
“How are you likeing the place?” Jeremy asks smiling brightly at him.   
“Good. Ive had worse jobs.” Mickey says.   
“Oh yeah? Like what?” Jeremy asks. Who does this guy think he's fooling, sure he seems nice enough but he is also a total tool, Mickey can already tell that much.   
“Plenty of them. No need to get into that.” He says   
“Ah well. You should come out with us tonight? Us grunts like to get together and have a few drinks at Bart's down the road. You should come.” He says   
“Okay. Maybe.” Mickey says and after a minute the guy buggers off. If Mickey hadnt personally seen the guy trying to get in every girls pants around the place he would of sworn the guy was hitting on him. Weird.   
“I wouldn't do that.” The guy beside him whispered.   
“Huh? Why not?” Mickey asked curiously.   
“Jeremy and his cronies. They are assholes.” He says quietly.   
“Seems nice enough. For a northsider, I suppose.” Mickey says.   
“He's not. Probably just trying to find out if you're gay.”   
“Hmm. Why's that? I scream, homo to you?” Mickey asks.   
“N…no. Um. It's just something they do. As the new guys to hang out, get them drunk, you know, see if they are gay or whatever.” He says

“They do that to you? They hurt you or something?” He asks.   
“No. They won't touch me. Embarrass me..sure. But I'm off limits. Boss’ son and all.” And Mickey tilled his head. 

“Boss's son? Really?” Mickey asks. 

“One of many. Yes.” And Mickey nodded.   
“Well thanks for the warning kid. You old enough to drink?” Mickey asks.   
“Not really. But they serve me anyway.” He says and Mickey chuckles.   
“Come on. I'll buy you a drink as a thank you.”   
“Nah. Not a good idea. They'll think…hanging out with me is like having a target on your back.” Mickey shrugs. 

“I ain't afraid of those assholes. Besides I'm sure they're brand of homophobia is nothing compared to the shit I've seen. Should have met my father, real piece of work.” Mickey says.   
“Oh yeah?” The kid asks.

“Yeah. Sides I ain't hittin on you. I have my very own disfunctionally stable relationship of my own. Pretty happy with it too. What's your name anyhow?” Mickey asks.   
“Skylar.” He says quietly. 

“Alright sky, let me text the ball and chain, let's get a drink.”

Mick: hey, gonna grab a drink after work.  
Ian: k. Want me to meet you?  
Mick: sure if you want, it's Bart's, ppl from work will be there. You okay with that?  
Ian: who are you going with?   
Mick: boss's son, seems kind of lost. Poor kid. 

Ian stares at his phone. His blood runs cold. Bart's…Jeremy…Preston…fuck. He doesn't even pause to think about what he's doing, he doesn't think about anything except that night, and about Mickey being in the middle of those assholes, sure he could handle it if he expected the assholes to attack, but if he didn't see it coming, fuck. Not fifteen minutes later he is standing outside trying to calm himself for a second which doesn't work he just huffs and tears into the place. The place he wasn't welcome, the place that he had tore through in anger, almost destroying the place while pissed off and maybe a little manic. 

“The fuck are you doing here?” Jeremy yells and Ian just glares at him.   
“Where is he?!” Ian yells.   
“Who? Who the fuck you going on about? Your kind is not welcome here. As I'm sure you're aware.” Jeremy bites out with venom.   
“Where's your boyfriend Jeremy. Where the fuck is Preston!?” Ian growls.   
“best friend asshole and shouldn't you know? You had him sent away. Not back until next month, dickface.” Jeremy stands getting closer to ians face. 

“Ian?” A small voice croaks. It's not Mickey but he recognizes it still, it's older than it was before. He turns and sees him but he looks so frightened, so afraid, like he always did before.  
“Skylar?” Ian asks.  
“Stay away from Him.” Jeremy bites.   
“The fuck is going on?” Mickey asks from beside Skyler.   
“This asshole, isn't welcome here. He's a pervert.” One of the guys behind Jeremy says.   
Mickey just quirks an eyebrow. “Why? Cause he's gay?”   
“Wh..how'd you…” Jeremy stutters. Mickey just rolls his eyes.   
“Whatever, ain't got time for this, tables this way, Sky, Ian, you coming.” He says. The men nod and follow him.   
“You okay if Ian sits with us?” Mickey asks and skylar nods. 

Ian sits down but doesn't say anything, he just stares realizing his mistake. He ran in trying to save Mickey from Preston but it wasn't him, it was prestons little brother that Mickey was talking about. Now he was sure to have ruined any peace Mickey had in that place. 

“W…why are you here?” Skylar asks. “They'll kill you.” He looks over at Preston glaring at ians back.   
“I…umm…” Ian stammers.   
“I asked him to come.” Mickey says.   
“Wha…why?” The boy inquires.  
“Dysfunctionally stable.” Mickey says and skylers eyes widen as he seems to recognize and Ian stares at them confused.   
“What?” He asks.   
“You're his boyfriend?” Skylar whispers.   
“How'd you get that from that I'll never know.” Ian shakes his head. Mickey looks over and him and smiles.   
“So what you run in here like a bat outta hell for firecrotch?”   
“You…said bosses brother…” He says   
“You thought it was Preston?” Skyler asks. Confusing Mickey.   
“Second time I heard that name…who the fuck is Preston?”   
“My brother. He's an asshole.” Skylar says. “I'm sorry for what he…” Skylar stammers.   
“Don't worry about it kid. Not your fault, your brothers a homophobic psycho, he gets it from your dad.” Ian laughs somewhat bitterly.  
“B…but it is. If I wouldn't have….nevermind.” He shakes his head.  
“What?” Ian asks, and Mickey listens despite his confusion.   
“I…had a crush on you…dad found out.” Skylers face turns a deep red.   
“You what? How did I not know that?” Ian says   
“And why wouldn't he, look at you. A teenagers wet dream, well atleast he was mine, mmmm.” Mickey says laughing. Trying not to focus on the fact that his new friend had a think for his boyfriend.   
Skylar laughs.   
“Wait so your asshole brother went after me…because he thought I was gonna bone a teenager? What the fuck. You know I wouldn't right? Like for fucks sake. You were, what 15 back then.”   
Skylar nods. “I know. It's just…nevermind.” He looks at Mickey embarrassed.   
“It's cool kid. Say what you gotta say, as long as you don't lean over and try to kiss him, I'm not gonna do anything.” And Skylar laughs again.   
“It's just I wasn't even out or anything but they knew, you were just this force, hot and nice, and you weren't ashamed. You were gay and you didn't care what anyone thought about it, I liked that. I wasn't gonna try to get with you or anything Ian, I just wanted to be more like you, more fearless. I didn't mean to tell them about your meds. I didn't. They drugged you because of me…” He says.  
“They what??” Mickey says.   
“Not a big deal mick. They didn't do anything, not really. Stripped me down, kept saying shit to someone about likeing it, and unfortunately for them, my crazy kicked it. Punched Preston in the face. Got him pretty good.” Ian shrugs as if it was nothing. 

“I'll kill them.” Mickey says glaring up at Jeremy. 

“Don't mick. It's not worth it.” And Mylar bids in agreeance.   
“It's really not. I'm so sorry Ian.” He says.   
“Not your fault okay? I've been through a lot worse than that, for being what I am. On face I think it pails in comparison to being pistol whipped by your boyfriends father. Don't you think?” He says looking at Mickey.   
“Or being forced to fuck a prostitute for being gay.” Mickey says nodding.   
Skylar looks at them in awe.   
“Seriously?” He asks and they nod.   
“On the south side, homophobia comes in a pretty ugly form. Your dad is a dick. But nothing I can't handle. Don't worry about it.” Ian says.   
\--

“You sure I can't just punch them in their smug faces?” Mickey asks later that night.   
“Mickey…probation remember.” Ian says sitting down on the couch   
“Yeah yeah. This why you didn't want them to know about us?” Mickey asks   
“Yeah. Just didn't want them to make it harder for you. Because of me.”  
“You didn't do anything wrong. Besides the whole, not telling me about it thing.” Mickey says turning to face Ian.   
“I just wanted you to get through this shit without getting yourself into trouble.” Mickey nods.   
“I know. I know. But fuck. They did that shit. You said you went manic, what did they even give you that caused that? To cancel out your meds so fast?” Mickey asks   
“Fuck if I know. They obviously didn't intend for me to freak out like that. Just figured they'd get me messed up, record me doing something fucked up and fagbash me for it or some shit. But I snapped, I didn't even know why, like it was about Skylar? I didn't know fen know the kid was gay, not really, just seemed like a sad kid, who hung around the office a lot. I thought he was a few times, Some of the question's he'd ask, but I never asked, his family is a bunch of assholes." Ian says.

"Yeah sounds like he looked up to you. I think he feels a lot of guilt about waht happened to you. Today, jeremy invited me for a drink with the guys, and as soon as he left he warned me off, he implied a few times that they do this sort of thing a lot, try to find out if the new guy is gay so they can out him or some shit. Seemed like a nice kid." He shrugs. 

"He is. Families a bunch of fuckheads but we know all about that shit don't we?" ian smiles at Mickey.   
"That's one word for it. We could put all of our parents into a house and burn it to the ground and I wouldn't even feel sad about it." Mickey laughs a little.   
"Yeah no shit." Ian smiles. "Just, try really hard to behave at work, Don't let those assholes get to you." Mickey nods.   
"Sure. I'll try, but I aint hiding this shit okay? I haven't said anything about us because nobody asked, I never agreed to dragging myself and you along with me back into the closet and I sure as shit ain't doing it now. It takes a bigger man than those fuckheads to scare me, If I can stand up in front of my father and tell him to fuck off, I ain't cowering to these pricks either. You got that Gallagher." Mickey says and Ian nods. "So lunch tomorrow?" Mickey smirks.   
"Sure, and I'm all for, you know, not hiding, but...pretty sure I'm not allowed in the building still. I haven't been legally bared or anything...Yet." Mickey shrugs.   
"alright, I can meet you somewhere, if you're too scared." Mickey smirks.   
"oh fine. I'll talk to Alan and see if there is any legal grounds that I can't show up. You want to flaunt our love in front of those homophobic assholes. I'm in." Mickey leans in and kisses Ian.   
"If you would have told me, back when we wre kids, that I would be suggesting such things, I would have called you a damn liar and probably kicked the shit out of you." Ian laughed at that.   
"Um, mick, you did kick the shit out of me a few times remember." Ian smiles and Mickey tackles him lightly.   
And Ian kisses him feverishly. 

“And then dad said that Preston is due home in a week. Just fucking great.” Skylar says.  
“Don't worry too much kid. You should get out of that house. Hiding all the time sucks, trust me.”  
“How'd you do it, find someone, you said your dad was worse? How'd you ever find anyone.” Skylar asks.   
“Find? I don't know, this lanky red –headed kid bursts into my bedroom one night, with a tire iron above his head, telling me to give his bosses gun back and I fought with him, and he ..I don't know did something to me, and for some fucking reason he wouldn't leave me alone. Kinda glad he didn't Though, I kinda like his stupid ass.” He says.   
“Ian?” He asks.   
“One and the same. It's not all rainbows and butterflies but when you find it, that person that makes it all worth it, you don't care so much anymore, you fight, because that's all you can do ya know?” He says.   
“So why weren't you together, back then?” He asks.   
“Because, I did some stupid shit and he did some stupid shit. Life happens sometimes.”   
“And it's better now? Life?”   
“Yeah it kind of is. You know you ask a lot of questions” mickeys laughs.   
“Milkovich, boss wants to see you,” Jeremy smirks walking out of the office. Mickey rolls his eyes and goes over to the office. Skylar shoots him a sad look. 

\--  
“You wanted to see me?” Mickey says.  
“Are you gay?” Francis asks.   
“Are you even legally allowed to ask me that?” Mickey says.   
“I'm asking as a concerned father. I will not have…my employees trying to take advantage of my boys confusion.” He says sternly.   
Mickey laughs a little. “Confusion? That's what you call it? Well nevermind that, I have no interest in your son in the manner you are referring to.” He says.   
“You sure about that? Seem kind of Cozy over there.” The man glares at him.   
“He's a nice kid is all. Look, my sexual orientation is none of your buisness. And by saying that you can already guess what it is, let me be clear about something sir, I've seen older men prey on teenage boys or young adults, and I find it disgusting to say the least, my interests do not include anybody that is ten plus years younger than me. Never has.” The man continues to stare at him, probably shocked that someone would have the nerve to speak to him in such a way.   
“I've also known plenty of men, who spew hatred, and that makes me sick as well. Don't fill your son with self-loathing because you can't handle who he might be.” Mickey says.   
“You think I hate my son?” He asks.   
“I think you hate, what you fear he might be. That you think that his sexuality reflects onto you somehow. It doesn't. Your particular brand of homophobia doesn't bother me all to much, I understand it, but that's your son out there. He may be gay, hell he might not be but it shouldn't matter a damn bit one way or another.” He says.

“Your father teAch you that?” Francis asks.   
“No..my father taught me a lot of things, none of which are good things. Someone else taught me about acceptance, of a lot of things.” Mickey shrugs.   
“You are not interested in my son?” He finally says.   
“Sure I am. But not in a sexual way.” The man nods.   
\--  
Ian doesn't come up for lunch that day, not because of anything other than being busy. And Mickey doesn't Mind too much, he chats with Skylar about stupid things. And some about Ian. 

“You said you had a crush on Ian right? That Still a thing? Should I be worried?” Mickey asks  
“No..no. I would never. He's cool and all, but I have…nevermind. I'm not interested in Ian like that anymore. I don't know if I ever was really, he just kind of fascinated me. So sure of himself.” Skylar shrugged.   
“Don't I know it.” Mickey says fondly.   
“So mick…yesterday we talked about other shitty jobs you had. You care to elaborate?” Jeremy saunters over, looking entirely too pleased with himself. “Like what could be worse than being an office bitch, and hanging out with this loser.” 

“Oh I don't know…like maybe prison?” Mickey answers smirking. Jeremy's face hardens and he freezes for a minute. 

“Prison? What for?” Mickey looks over to Skylar who is holding in his laughter. 

“Attempted murder.” Mickey shrugs not caring to elaborate. 

“…wha..why would you try and kill someone.” 

“Didn't say I did. But if I had, it's probably because the bitch fucked with what was mine. Nobody messes with what's mine.” He says pulling out his best menacing Milkovich smile. Seeing Jeremy visibly gulp.


	14. Huge family.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prestons back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally found some inspiration for this one. ;)

 

Chapter 14:

Mickey looks up from his desk when he hears Skylar groan. He sees a group of men walking into the office. There's like seven of them. “You okay kid?” He asks the boys.

“Yeah, m’fine. My brothers are here.” He says

“All of them? You have seven brothers?” Skylar nods.

“And three sisters.” He says

“Holy fucking shit. That's almost mine and ians combined.” He says and Skylar laughs.

Mickey looked up and watched them for a minute. Skylar was definetely the quiet one of the bunch. They demanded attention, walking into the room. He wondered how many of them were assholes like Preston and their father or if it was just all of them. He actually wondered if Skylar had it worse off than him, Terry was an asshole, but his brothers weren't so bad, what would it be like to live with eight homophobic assholes. And what about the sisters? It was easy to tell who Preston was, first of all he even looked like a giant douche but he was already leaning over Jeremy's desk talking to him and then his head snapped up towards Mickey and Skylar. Fucking great.

“Hey Skylar…hear you got a new friend.” Preston says and Mickey rolls his eyes.

“Preston, leave him alone.” One of the guys says.

“What Eric? Just a question. Can't I ask about my baby brother and his friend?” He asks faking innocence.

“You could, if you weren't being an asshole. Let's go see dad and then go down and get a beer.” He says. “Hey sky, you should come down when you get outta here. Bring your friend. Don't pay any kind to Preston.” And Skylar nods at his older brother and smiles lightly at him.

“Sure Eric. I'll stop by. But mick has plans.” He says

“Alright. Another time then.” He nods.

“My boys.” Their father says stepping out of the office. Where are the girls?” He asks

“On their way dad.” One of them says.   
“Alright.”   
\--  
Ian finally gets up the courage to walk into the office. He has paperwork from Mr.Green, who offered to bring it himself, warned him that Preston was coming back today but Ian wasn't afraid of him, not for himself anyway. He did however want to make sure the asshole wasn't fucking with Mickey.  
He gets to the lobby and almost runs into Rachel Lyon. “Ian?” She asks. And he nods at her. “Holy shit. What are you doing here? Aren't you banned?” She asks.

“Paperwork from Alan. Gotta bring it up to your dad. He knows I'm coming.” He says. She nods and two girls come up from behind her. Her sisters. Abigail and jasmine. “Hey Ian. You heading up?” They asked and he nods.   
“You know prestons up there right?” Abigail days and Ian nods.   
“I'll be fine. I can take care of myself.” Ian answers.   
“Oh we know that. Against Preston maybe. But even Mr.southside can't go up against all of them at once.” Rachel says. And Ian swallows at that. They're all up there. All seven of them.

“You think all of them are gonna pounce on me?” He asks.   
“Not unprovoked, my brothers aren't his personal bodyguards. They may love him, but they don't like him enough to attack you in an office building, unless you piss them off. I'd steer clear of sky though. They're fearcly protective of him.” Rachel says. “We all are.”

“You guys know, I wasn't actually trying to fuck your brother, right? I may be gay, that doesn't mean I'm some predator.” Hi says and the girls nod.

“We know. If we thought you were, we would have killed you ourselves.” Jasmine says and he believes her.

When the elevator dings, the girls step off with ins behind them. Jeremy stands up and Preston glares at him. “What is he doing here?” He growls out.

“Oh back off cujo. He's here to see dad.” Jasmine says. The boys turn around and see Ian and their father steps from behind them.

“Mr.gallagher. I've been expecting you. You remember my boys.” He says and Ian nods.

“Ian..man how you been?” Vincent says. And Ian nods.

“Um..good. I'm good. How are you guys?” He asks and the six of them nod in response.

“Right this way.” Francis says ushering Ian in his office, leaving his children outside the door.

“Have a seat. Alan says you have some paperwork for me.” He says professionally. And Ian nods sitting the papers on the desk.   
“How are you? Things good?” He says

“Yeah. Good.” He says.   
“I hear you ran into my boy and his new friend the other day?” He says and Ian nods.   
“Um yeah.” He says.   
“Trust that went well.”   
“Yeah sure. Sir?” He asks and Francis nods.   
“Something you want to ask me?” Ian asks sweetly.   
“No, not really. I was just curious as to how you happened to be at the bar? You hadn't been there since, you stopped working here is all. Looking for a fight? Or my son?” He asks and Ian sees the concern in his face. And it pisses him off.

“Sir. Let me be perfectly clear, because I feel like I need to be. I am not interested in your son. I am not, that guy, I know what you think of me, I have known plenty of men, like the one you're suggesting I am, preying on young boys, in fact I was once one of those young boys. I would never…do to any other human what they did to me. My interests, are a little more tasteful than a teenage boy.” He says

“He's not a teenager anymore.” Francis says.

“As true as that might be. Even if I were single, and looking for a man to share my bed with, which I am not by the way, a twenty year old kid, would not be the one I'd be going for. I wanted to be your sons friend, to be there for him, because coming out in this fucking city, is brutal. Maybe not as brutal as it was on the southside but still, brutal. And I wouldn't wish some of the things I've seen on anybody. Especially not a sweet kid like Skylar. That is not who I am. And I did not deserve what your other son did to me, nor what he was planning on doing to me, whatever that was. How would you feel if someone did that to Skylar? Tricked him and drugged him and stripped him down? Sir, that was one of the most vile things I've ever seen, and I once got pistol whipped for loving who I love.” Ian says a tear in his eye and Francis nods and continues with his paperwork.

“You are right about that much. What happened…was uncalled for. There is no excuse for it, I may not agree with how you live or what you do, but you are right, if someone did that to my son, they would be dead. I want to protect my son, what he is, I'm not stupid, I've known for a long time, and people will torture him for it, use him, and destroy him. That is something I do not want for him. I'm not a monster, even if you think I am.” He says and Ian nods. “I won't say that I wasn't concerned, and voiced those concerns to my son, a man of your age hanging out with a boy of my youngest boys age, didn't sit well with me, I will not apologize for that concern Mr.Gallagher. Or my views on your lifestyle, however I do not want you to thing I agree with what happened to you. I do not.” He finishes and hands the papers to Ian.

Ian doesn't say another word he just gets up and walks out of the office. The memories of so many things running through his mind, he doesn't even see Mickey get up and look over at him. The concern etched on his face at ians obviously distraught face. “What happened?” He asks and Ian doesn't really hear him.

“Dad? What did you say to him?” Skylar asks his father.   
“Nothing we just had a chat. He's alright.” Francis says.   
“Is that true? Are you okay?” Mickey asks looking at Ian, now in front of his face and he reaches a hand up to his face, bringing him out of his thoughts.   
“Gallagher….” He says slowly and Ian nods.   
“I'm good. I'm good.” He says.

“Well well, what is this?” Preston looking at the men. “One pervert, protecting another?”   
“Enough!” Francis barks at his son.   
His other sons look at their father, and back to parker.  
“Preston man, back off. Ians here on buisness.” Eric says   
“Sure. Or trying to worm his way into our little brothers pants. Not gonna happen Gallagher.” Parker bites.

“Oh get off it preston he's not even looking at Skylar. He's obviously upset, and I'd say his interests aren't directed at our little brother, so back off it.” Brendan says. And Ian looks over at him and smiles.

“Well they don't seem so bad.” Mickey whispers to Ian and Ian smiles.   
“Hey we're goin down to the bar. Ian..you shouldn't come down, Preston will behave himself, or I'll put my boot in his ass.” Eric says.   
“Maybe. I've gotta get back to the office. I might come by, gotta see what I have planned tonight.” Ian says.

“What? Got another boy to perv on.” Preston says And ians arm shoots out to stop Mickey who is about to lunge.

“Come on man move. Just want to hit him once.” Mickey says.   
“Not worth it.” Ian says   
“Fine.” Mickey growls and looks at Preston. “Consider yourself lucky.”   
The boys start to walk out, dragging their brother with them. “Come on asshole, before the guy punches you, looks like he's about to.” One of the brothers says

“Don't know what his problem is. Wasn't talking to his faggy ass anyway.”

“Oh that's fucking it….” Mickey stands up and everyone freezes but Ian lunges and stops him stepping between him and Preston.   
“Hey…look at me.” Mickey does.

“Not worth it. It's okay. You wanna kick the whit out of him when your job here is done, I'll help you, not today okay?” And Mickey seems to calm slightly and nods.  
“Mhm. Okay. Alright.” Mickey nods. And Ian smiles. “Tonight?” He asks knowing who's listening.   
“Whatever you want.” Ian whispers suddenly lost in mickeys trance.  
“Come to the bar with me.” Skylar says from the desk and they both nod, not looking away from eachother.   
“Yeah…we can do that. Moral support for sky.” Mickey says and Ian nods lightly. And then Mickey smiles, and smirks and grabs ians head and pulls it down to his.

“What..are…” Ian asks   
“Just kiss me already.” Mickey says. And Ian does because who could say no to that beautiful fuck-me look.

“Told you he wasn't looking at Skylar.” They hear from behind them.   
\--  
Mickey and Ian finally break away when someone clears their throat. Mickey turns to look at his his standing at his office. “Sorry” he says. Because he knows a kiss was one thing, but that kiss was inappropriate.

Skylar smiles up at them. “God you guys are adorable.” He says laughing.   
“Mm..gotta go…ill meet you down there…um later.” Ian stammers out. Damn that kiss.

\--

“Hey there lover boy.” Jasmine says in the lobby.   
“Um hey.”   
“That the boyfriend I presume.” She says  
“Mhm.” He said still a little dreamily.   
“You get over the ex you were so hung up on?” She asks.   
“Nah. Still very much in love with that one.” He says smiling  
“That him?” She asks   
“Yup.” And she smiles  
“Good. See you tonight alright. I'll punch my brother if he starts shit.” She says  
“Hey. Jazz. I'm gonna invite mickeys sister, that cool. You'd fucking love her.”   
“Sure thing sweetness.” She says.

 

 

 


	15. Bar talks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey and Ian join the Lyons siblings at the bar. And Ian learns something about that night he didn't know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two fics updated in one day. :) enjoy:)

Wish you would

Chapter 15:

Ian walked into the bar after a long busy day. He had a new project about to start up and as much as he would miss Mickey on his job site everyday he knew that Mickey was working towards something he really wanted to do, If he could get into his more permanent job, away from this one, everything would be perfect. It wasn't that the whole family was a shit show. He had actually adored them when he met them, baring Preston, who he hated with a fiery passion. They weren't all that bad. He did like some of them more than others, but that was true with any other family he had ever met.

He hadn't spotted his boyfriend yet and he really wanted to just go home and curl up in mickeys arms. He felt a arm around his shoulders, but it wasn't the comforting one of his boyfriend, he growled before even looking over. “What…you don't like my arm around you? You did once.” Preston purred.

“Must have been the drugs. You remember, the ones you slipped into my drink. Bet you still regret that one huh?” Ian snarls.

“Whatever man. I'm being nice. You should try It.” Preston says and Ian laughs loudly.   
“Nice? You must have your definitions of that word and asshole mixed up. Now if you'll excuse me. I have a date.” He says

“With who? My brother? I don't know what you and your creepy boyfriend have planned for him, but keep away alright.” Preston says and Ian can actually see the protectiveness in his eyes. Instead of the sadistic asshole that's usually there.

“What's with you huh? You think every gay guy in the world is some sadistic pedo? I'm not interested in fucking your brother or anyone besides my boyfriend for that matter.” Preston seems a little taken back by the statement.

“Finally stopped with the fake celibacy bullshit huh?” He says.   
Ian rolled his eyes and walked over to the table that his boyfriend was at.   
\--

Jasmine and Mandy were chatting and laughing and Ian laughed. He knew they'd get along.   
“You okay? Want me to punch my brother in the throat? I'm totally down for that.” She says laughing and Mandy joins her.

“Man I love her.” She giggles.

“Knew you would.” Ian says smiling at the girls.

“So tell me boys. How did this happen? Last time we spoke, you were sure that your sexy ex would never speak to you again.” She says.

“He never gives up. Kind of like that about him.” Mickey says smiling.

“Ah. So shit wasn't so dire huh Gallagher?” She says smirking.

“Shut up jazz. Shit was fucked up, really fucked up. I still don't know why he talks to me after what I did.” Ian says.

“Hard not to when your so damn cute.” Mickey laughs and she smiles and Mandy does too.

“I actually forgot how disgustingly cute you two can be.” Mandy says laughing.

It's then that they are approached my a group of Lyons brothers. And asshat Jeremy.

“You gonna stay all to yourselves all night?” Logan says and Ian shrugs looking over at Preston and Jeremy.

"They are going to behave themselves tonight isn't that right boys?" Chase says clasping his hands on the men's shoulders who coward down and glared out at Ian but nodded. Chase was big guy, in fact even though he was the middle boy, he was built like a brick house. He was terrifying, even to Ian who knew the boy held no malace towards him, he was actually one of the friendliest men he had ever met, but he was terrifying none the less.

"Now these fuckheads will behave, and we have something to say to you. All of us. What these assholes did.." Chase says glaring down at his brother and his friend. "Was uncalled for , and I for one know that you had no intentions towards my baby brother, we both know what would happen if I thought you or anyone else was trying to take advantage of him.." He says.

"Chase for real? he was taking advantage of Sky's confusion..." Preston grinded out.

"Confusion?" Chase laughs at that. "Baby brother...are you confused about who you like to bang? I mean not specifically..." He says looking at skylar who shakes his head.

"and did that realization, have a damn thing to do with ian gallagher. He persuade you in anyway?" Chase asks.

"No. Of course not. He only ever told me that it was okay to be whoever I was." Skylar answers his brother because as Ian knew, he and everyone else in this room held a high respect for chase.

"See? Baby brother know's what he likes. Ian or no Ian, that wasn't going to change. You and fuckhead can take your internalized homobobia and shove it up eacchother's asses if you like. I don't care. Skylar can bang who he wants and as long as it's what he wants, neither one of you, or your homoerotic friends get a say in that shit. I believe I made that bullshit clear when it happened? No more of this shit." He growls out looking at his brother. "Fucking got it?" He says.   
"Like this one, he's less of a prick than that one." Mickey says pointing at preston. and Chase chuckles.

"Well that doesn't take much, now does it, come on boys. Let's buy you a drink. Tell me how exactly the new intern met the old one?" He says motioning for the barkeep to bring over a round of drinks.

"Well there was this gun..." Ian says laughing.

"Oh fuck off." Mickey laughs.

"A gun? wait a minute...that like a code word or something?" Jayce asks, and Ian burts out in laughter as Mickey scowls.

"No...like a real gun. This fuckhead stole it from my employer.."

"He deserved it, fucking pedo towel head. To this day, I will kill that mother fucker if I ever see him again." Mickey growls, anger rising up in him at the mention of Kash.

"Well, that might have a little more to do with the fact that he shot you." Ian says and the boys watch him.

"Wait...Pedo?" its jeremy that speaks eyeing them.

"Yeah jackass... some assholes, aren't just accused of shit they'd never do, ya know? Some assholes who are way too old to be fucking fifteen year olds, actually do it, and deserve to fucking die." Mickey says. and ian places a hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay. Mick..it was a long time ago. I'm not fifteen anymore, and nobody, is taking advantage of me, not kash, or ned or any other gay ass queen in a club." He says and Mickey smiles at him. The guys watch him and jasmine busts out laughing.

"Woah woah woah...How many old ass men did you fuck around with Ian?" Jasmine asks.

"Too fucking many. from what I remember, alot of it was the mania...but ya know." he says and she nods. then she picks up a coaster off the table and chucks it at Preston.

"Ow...the fuck!" he says.

"You are a fucking dick!" she says.

" I didn't say a damn thing bitch. I was just sitting here listening, I didn't comment on shit. fucking christ." he says rolling his eyes.   
"Yeah and you didnt think that, oh I'm sorry that I assumed you were like the assholes that took advantage of you, I'm sorry that I attacked you and drugged you, I'm sorry that I'm a low life prick. any of that feel like anything you should be saying to him? because I for one think so." she says. Preston doesnt say anything.

"Oh what so we're supposed to believe that just because Ian and his boyfriend say that he was taken advantage of, just because they say he had no interest in skylar, that we were supposed to believe that bullshit. The fuck ever." Jeremy says crossing his arms, and preston looks over at him and hits him on the back of the head. "The fuck man?"

"Shut up Jer. shit was your idea anyway. got me sent away to my moms for how fucking long, just shut up." he says.

"You're idea? are you freaking kidding me? Protective older brother...I get it...I mean I chased the kid down the street and was ready to beat the living fuck out of him when I thought he messed with mands, But what the fuck do you care?" Mickey says leaning over the table.

"What? How could you think he messed with her?" Jasmine asks.   
"That one was my bad. Fucker turned me down, I was pissed off. Who knew it was because he'd rather fuck my brother than me." Mandy shrugs laughing.

"This conversation is so fucked up." brendan says shaking his head. "Let's drink. and back to this gun story. There was a gun..." he says cutting off anything else.

"Trust me, the homophobes in this room don't want to hear how that story ended." Ian says smiling at Jeremy and Preston.

"Wait...He stole your bosses gun, who you were fucking...and you two ended up fucking? That's so messed up." Abigail says from beside her brothers.

"Mhm. don't let these assholes fool ya, with their domestic bullshit, no matter what they do, it always ends in fucking." Mandy says.

"Weren't you all...celebacy is my life...Last time we saw you?" Caiden asks tilting his head. and mandy and Ian laughed. because he was right, Ian had given the speach so many times, mostly to any of the brothers that asked about his relationship with skylar but it had been true none the less, he was strictly on a no dick diet back then.

"Yeah, well I was. I did...a lot of stupid shit at one point in my life, and before I started working here, I decided that I didn't deserve a lot of things, but there was one that I wanted to deserve again, call me a fag, because this is really fucking gay, but I didn't deserve him, and I promised myself that I wouldn't touch another man until that man was him." Ian says.   
"Well that's a little mushy as shit for me, but more power to ya man. and where was this one then?" Chase asks   
"I was in prison." Mickey says honestly and everyone looks at him.   
"For?" Chase asks.   
"Attempted murder. Tried to kill, his bitch of a sister. allegedly." Mickey says laughing, adding in the last part.   
"you were convicted Mick, there aint no allegedly about it." Ian says laughing.   
"Woah, woah woah....He tried to kill your sister, and you thought you didn't deserve him. Anybody else feeling really good about our family right now?" Logan says.   
"No shit right? like the fuck?" Eric smiles at them.   
"She deserved it. That bitch is crazy." Mickey says laughing.

The next hour was just a bunch of people sitting around, and talking. Jeremy made a few smart ass comments, that earned him a few smacks, preston stayed silent until he finally went and sat at the bar by himself and everyone else from what mickey could tell were alright. They weren't all bad, and he really liked chase and jasmine, they seemed fun. So he finally relaxed and he was ready to get Ian back home. After telling everyone bye, they were headed out but Ian stopped. “Give me a minute okay?” Mickey looks at Ian like he's crazy because he is, ians looking over at Preston and he knows Ian is going to say something to him.

“Ian, don't. Let's just go.” Mickey says.

“It's okay. I'm good. And he isn't going to do anything, not with his brothers here. I'm good. Just give me a minute.” Mickey nods but stands by the door, just in case.

“We're going. You can have your welcome home party back.” Ian says looking over at the pathetic looking Preston.

“Not a welcome home. But thanks. More like a don't fuck up party. Pretty sure that's why they invited you. To remind me, why I was gone in the first place.” He says.

“Well. Good for them for that. Look. I'm not here to goad you, or whatever. And I'm sure as fuck not here to try to get in your brothers pants. The fact that you think that makes me sick. In fact all of it does. You tricked me, acted like a friend, and did that shit. When Alan said he was sending Mickey over to your dads company it made me physically ill, thinking of what you might try when you found out what he is to me. He's had enough homophobia bullshit from back home to last a life time, he doesn't need that shit. Just…leave him alone, leave us alone and I won't bother you.” Ian says and Preston looks up with a sad look in his eyes.

“I..umm. I'm not gonna mess with your boyfriend okay? I wasn't.. Fuck I don't know why I'm telling you this…I really thought you were gonna hurt my brother. I'm not like my father or even Jeremy. I don't hate you because your gay. Who the fuck cares about that shit. I thought you were gonna fuck with my brother. And he's a nice kid okay? He trusts everyone. I just…when Jeremy told me that you were…well whatever, I lost my shit. I wasn't going to actually hurt you. I went there to…kick your ass, tell you to leave him alone, that he was just a kid. I didn't drug you okay? I don't know who did, but it wasn't me, I l. don't even know after that. It got so out of hand. I just wanted you to stay away from my brother.”

“So why strip me down? Why? I get the protective shit, I do. I have siblings too…but what you did was fucked up. If you would have tried to kick my ass, that would have been one thing, I could understand it, respect it even, where I come from sometimes fists is the best way to have a conversation, but man. Whatever it was in that drink counteracted my meds, and I lost my shit. And we'll we all know how that went, but before that you stripped me down, put me on display…why?”

“I don't know….I was so angry. At that point I don't even remember doing it okay? I remember the drinks and the arguing, and after that I remember you kicking the shit out of me, I don't remember that. I don't remember doing what I did. What did I do?” Preston asks.   
“Seriously?” Ian asks looking at him, trying to gauge what the truth was because he honestly didn't know.   
“Seriously. Just tell me. Me exactly, what did I do?”

“You um..asked me about my sexuality, tried to kiss me. And then yelled at me about being into teenagers. Called me sick and a couple of things I don't repeat, homophobic slurs. You punched me…and then your friends grabbed me and stripped me down. Skylar came in screaming, and you asked me if that's what I liked. Then you asked him if I was what he liked, as I was naked. And I snapped after that. The shock of what was happening no longer there, I started hitting anyone that came near me, throwing things. After that, a few days I was still so angry, I came here and tore this place apart, kicked your ass, went to the office, tore that shit apart." Ian says

"The fuck. I...wait..I tried to kiss you?" Preston asks tilting his head in confusion.

"You really don't remember any of it, do you?" Ian asks "Did..Um, well, did you drink any of what they gave me?"

"You think, i was drugged or..?"  
"On purpose, no probably not, because I'm pretty sure Jeremy wouldn't have drugged you, with whatever it was, doesn't mean you didn't drink it on accident. I mean, If you don't remember."   
"Fuck...That..I don't know. But I tried...oh god." He holds his head in his hands. "Jazz is right, I'm an asshole."   
"Well I can't argue that, but coming from someone who has done a lot of fucked up shit, you can get past it, just talk to skylar, He's your brother, that's who you need to appologize to. Not me."   
"Oh like he's ever going to talk to me again, he liked you, i don't know if it was as...a hot older guy or as a friend, but he did, and I took that away from him."

"Well, make it up to him. Talk to him, about shit, maybe let him go, that his being gay isn't something dirty or wrong, because it isn't. That's all I was ever trying to do, tell him that iit's okay, because before you come out, being gay can seem like a death sentense, and for people like me and mickey it actually could have been , so I just wanted him to know that it was okay, to be who he was. Maybe hearing that from his big brother who he used to look up to, might help him a lot. He might accept that he likes guys, but he's still withdrawn, I can see that. Be his big brother Preston." Ian says. and Preston nods. "And maybe find yourself some new friends. because while you might not fully understand what happened that night, your friends do, and somehow I find it hard to believe that every single on of you was acting under the influence, you might want to figure that shit out."

"You're right about that. I just thoought, I fucking blocked it out or something, I don't know." Preston says.

"Ya never know. like i said. Anything is possible." Ian says

"You said you've done some fucked up shit?" Preston says.

"mhm. Mania is a bitch man. It's a whole lot of doing stupid shit, and hurting the people you love, Feeling like you can do anything, and nothing can ever stop you. and then it fucking does, like a ton of bricks man. Like a ton of bricks."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come see me on tumblr.
> 
> Mysticallygallavich 
> 
> prompts welcome.


	16. The why of it all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mickey is on a mission to find out some answers.

Chapter 16:

“Are you kidding me?” Mickey yells. “You gave that fuckhead a pass? He's probably lieing. Didn't remember doing it, my fucking ass. I'll kill him. You just wait until this job is done and I'm hunting him and his freak of a best friend down and killing them both, after o torture them, old school Milkovich style.”

“Mickey…let it go.” Ian says

“Fuck no I'm not letting shit go.” Mickey huffs at his boyfriend and sits down.

“Mickey…just please okay? Im not asking for you to let this go forever okay? But blazing in and kicking everyone's ass is not the answer. I get it, I fucking did that, it solves nothing. It doesn't give me any answers. I always assumed it was just Preston being overprotective or a homophobic prick, and hell maybe your right. He might be lieing but what if he isn't? What if didn't set this shit up? Was is just Jeremy because he hated me for being gay? Why though? Why do all that shit? And if Preston was drugged was it a fucking accident? I want answers Mickey, I do. I was humiliated. And I'm not saying I wouldn't love to go all south-side on every person responsible for it, I would but who would that be? Preston? Jeremy? Random frat guys? Who?” Ian let's out a breath

  
“Fine. Fucking fine. But I want to know everything.” Mickey crossed his arms.

  
“I told you what happened that night.” Ian says.

  
“No…before. There's something your missing…okay? Something that tells you who hated you enough to do that vile shit. If it wasn't Preston..and I still think he's a prick and probably is a liar, if it wasn't, it was someone and I personally am going to kill the prick when I find out who he is, so you want me to kill the right person…start from the beginning.”  
\--

  
Mickey had promised to keep his cool, he had spend all night promising Ian that he would be a fucking adult and not revert to the tough ass thug he used to be, but that was easier said when he was along with his boyfriend that when he was being glared at by an extremely annoying Jeremy. He wanted to pick up every heavy object in that office and hurl it at his fucking head.

  
“Dude. You okay?” Skylar asks Mickey who shakes his head.

  
“Nope. Self control is not my strong suit. And I'd like to pummel that fuckhead right now. Every Milkovich bone in my body is begging me for it.” He says and Skylar smiles.

  
“Yeah I know. Just breathe.”

  
“Can I ask you something?” Mickey asks

  
“Mhm. What?”

  
“Back then. You know when Ian was here before. If you were to take a guess…who would you think would be the most likely to slip drugs in a drink? If it hadn't been your brother..who would have been the second guess?” Mickey asks.

  
“You don't think pres, did it?” Skylars shocked voice rings in his ear lowly.

  
“Didn't say that. Just doesn't seem smart enough to come up with that shit on his own.” Mickey chuckles. “You said you let it slip about his meds. Who was all there for that?”

“Jer, and Preston I think. Why?”

  
“No reason. Just curious. Want to know more about it is all. Protective boyfriend and all that. Don't mention, I was asking yeah?” Skylar nods.

  
“I'm going to ask again. You don't think it was my brother, do you?”

  
“Didn't say that. Personally wouldn't put it past him, but I don't know him. You do. Tell me what you think?”

  
“Honestly? I was actually really shocked when it happened. Preston is an asshole but I never thought he would do that. He seemed to like Ian enough? I knew he didn't like that I was, ya know gay, but I didn't think he'd do that to Ian just because he was. It was pretty fucked.”

  
Mickey nods at him and goes back to his work.   
\--

_“I don't care. Let it go.” Preston yells at his friend._

_  
“You gonna just let him take advantage of him…like..”_

_  
“Shut up! We aren't having this conversation. Ian isn't like that man. He's not gonna do that…to my baby brother.”_

_  
Ian is standing by his desk when he hears the boys arguing and backs up slowly to go unnoticed but not before hearing…_

__  
“You sure about that?”  
\--  
Ian stares at the wall thinking about the conversation that honestly had never crossed his mind but ever since Mickey started asking him more questions about that time in his life he himself wanted to figure it out. Possibly before Mickey did because Mickey would lose his shit. They boys had obviously been discussing him, and whatever they thought he was going to do to Skylar but what he cousin figure out is what Jeremy had been referring to. Who did they think he was like?

\--

Mickeys head snaps up as Preston saunters into the lobby just as Mickey is off the elevator and trying to get out of this building. He almost wants to walk past him and punch him in the face but he notices something, Preston has a look, a look that he doesn't see often on some northsider pricks face, it's a look you would be more likely see on his own face or any angry asshole from the south-side. He ducks behind a corner when he sees Jeremy round he corner.

“Hey man. You not want to come up?” Jeremy asks.

  
“What do you want jer? I was busy.” Preston bites.

  
“Man, chill. What is with your ass latley. Ever since your little love fest with Gallagher you've been bitchy. We could just take care of that fag and his little boyfriend. That make you feel better?”

  
Mickey clenches his fists. This fucker needed to die.

“What? No that wouldn't make me feel any better. Why you gotta use words like that? It's fucking crude.”

  
“Since when do you care what I call the redhead? You hate him.”

  
“And the only insulting shit you can come up with is about who he fucks? My brothers gay man. You use that word to describe him too?” Preston says.

  
“Different.” 

  
“How the fuck is it different? You know I don't like that shit. Just leave Gallagher alone okay? And his boyfriend too. They aren't hurting anyone, especially sky. So back off …you've done enough.”

Now Mickey was interested.

  
“What the fuck does that mean? This about that night. You were there too. Ducking pedo deserved a lot worse than he got.”

  
“Really? Why don't I remember it? And why does sky seem fine with him. If Ian really did what you said..why doesn't my brother hate him? And why does he think that Mickey and Ian are the cutest couple to dawn the face of this earth jeremy?” Preston accused.

  
“who knows? Why do abused women still stick around? Red did a number on your brother. He's traumatized or some shit. It happened, I saw it myself. Fucking sick, man.” Jeremy says and Preston growls.

  
“Just leave it okay. Let Milkovich finish his job and they can get our of our lives okay? No more trouble that gets me sent away..okay?” Preston says and Mickey waits until it's silent. The fuck was that about?   
\--

“What do you mean?” Ian asks as Mickey repeats what he heard.

  
“I think you might be right about some shit okay? Sounded sketchy as hell. We need to find out what the fuck Preston thinks you did to Skylar. It's either that or I just string Jeremy up right now because whatever this shit is, leads back to that fuckhead. And skinning him alive slowly would be my fucking pleasure.”

“Okay okay. Let's not go that far. Okay? I'll figure it out okay?” Mickey nods.

\--

Skylar walks down the hallway to the main living room to find his brother sitting on the couch alone.

  
“What? No party with Jeremy tonight?” Skylar asks.

  
“Nah. Don't feel like it tonight.” Preston says.

“You going out with your new friends?”

  
“Bitter? No I'm not. Why don't you like them pres? Just the gay thing?” He asks his brother trying to sound casual.

  
“No…he…nevermind. Just don't like him, or his little thug boyfriend is all. You know I don't give a shit that your gay right?” Preston says suddenly.

  
“Don't you though? After what you did to Ian because of who he is? What it's different because we're related. That's bullshit Preston.” Skylar bites out angrily.

  
“Because of who he is? He hurt you!” Akylars eyes widen and so does prestons and he puts his head down. 

  
“Excuse me? How did Ian Gallagher hurt me?What did he do that was wrong? He was nice to me, to you, even to your asshole friend who had a field day when he found out he was gay? How about how he sat at his desk and wrote letters to his boyfriend that he never sent but cried over anyway? Was it wrong that he told me it was okay to be gay? Told me stories of how cruel people could be yo prepare me for when I did come out?” 

  
“Just leave it alone. I'm going to bed.” Preston huffs.

  
“Oh wait? I got it! It was wrong when he kicked the shit out of that punk Damian for calling me a discrace to my name and called me a queer, told me I wasn't a man because I liked men. So was that it? You mad because Ian defended me like you never would!! You know what…fuck you!!” Skylar stomps off.  
“Damien?” Preston whispers confused.   
\--  
Ian is sifting through paperwork at his new work site when Jared pokes his head in. “Hey Ian.theres a pretentious asshole out here, wanting to speak to you.” Ian gets up and looks out the window to see Preston standing on the dirt a few feet away from his small trailer/office. Ian steps out and crosses his arms. “What do you want?” He grinds out.   
“Um..I need to know something.” He says   
“And that is? Spit it out Lyon…I ain't got all day for your ass.”   
“Snarky as hell. Been hanging around that boyfriend of yours too long?”   
“Only half my life. What is it?”  
“You and Skylar…” He starts and Ian rolls his eyes.   
“How many fucking times do I have to say that nothing happened with sky? I was never after your brother..”

“See..you say that..you say that you didn't hurt him, but I saw him okay? I trusted you! I thought you were being real with me when you promised you just wanted to be his friend. That you didn't want anything else from him. I thought maybe we were all wrong that you just wanted to be a nice guy, and I was wrong, you hurt him, he won't say it, I don't understand why he's still protecting you. I'm sorry for what we did to you, I am, but what you did….”   
“What did I do? How did I hurt him? I was his friend, I didn't even know he had a crush on me until like a week ago, and it wouldn't have mattered. He was a kid…a kid. Okay? I would have let him down easy, and told him to find someone his own age. Do what exactly do you think I did to your brother?”

“You expect me to believe that? He comes home one night after hanging out with you all bruised and broken and crying. Jeremy saw what you did to him!!!! How you...what you did.”

“Bruised? What are you talking about? When was this?” Ian asks confused.   
“The night before…that night.”   
“What did Jeremy say he saw Preston?” Ian asks shaking in anger.   
“He saw you fucking my brother!” Preston screams and everyone on the site turns to look at them and Preston scurries away and gets in his car and Ian stands stalk still.   
\--  
Ian gets in his car and races over to the office that Mickey worked at. What the actual fuck. He runs up the stairs, fuck the elevator, he needed to calm down and he walks in breathing heavily and Mickey goes to him.   
“Ian?” Mickey asks. Ian shakes his head.   
“I need to ask sky something…” He says and Mickey nods.  
\--  
Skylar steps out onto the roof with Ian.  
“What's going on?”  
“Sky, I'm going to ask you something really uncomfortable and I just need you to tell me the truth okay?” Skylar nods.

“Did I ever hurt you? Mislead you? Any of that?”   
“No.”  
“Okay. Did something happen, the night before the party where I was drugged and shit. Something you didn't tell me? With anyone”   
“What?”   
“When you left me, you were fine. There were no bruises, pretty sure we talked about random bullshit, we didn't get in any fights, we sure the hell didn't have sex, so I need to know what happened? Did you…have sex with someone? Did someone hit you or hurt you?”

“W…what is this?”   
“Please sky. I need to know. When you came home that night, you were bruised, and angry, atleast that's what Preston says and he thought that I did that…”  
“He..what? Why would he think that?”   
“Jeremy.”   
“What?!?!”   
“Tell me sky? What happened?”   
“Umm….I don't want to do this Ian…I cant…”   
“Please tell me. Did someone hit you?” Skylar nods.  
“Did that someone do anything else? Could Jeremy have seen something and thought it was me?”  
“No. I mean, Jeremy didn't misinterpret shit, he didn't see me with some redhead and think it was youZ that's not what happened Ian.”   
“Then…what…please tell me. Jeremy told your brother he saw me fucking you. I need to know.”   
\--  
 _It was late at the office. And Skylar had gone back after leaving Ian to go get his back back that he had left in his fathers office that day. He walked through the dark office with ease. Opening the door to find Jeremy sitting at his fathers desk drinking heavily._  
“Hey jer. What are you doing here?” The boy asked his brothers best friend.   
“Ya know. Work and shit.”   
“Okay well. Left my bag, gonna get that and go.”   
“Bring your ginger with you?” Jeremy slurs out.   
“No? Why would I bring Ian back to the office with me?”   
“So he could bend you over a desk? How the fuck should I know?”   
“Ooookkayyyy. That would never happen.”  
“You think I don't know you have a hard on for that asshole?”   
“Excuse me? I do not.”   
“Yeah okay. Sure. Keep on telling yourself that bullshit.”   
“What is with you Jeremy? You got a problem with Ian? Or me? You don't like that were gay or ale thing?”   
“What did you just say?”   
“I'm gay?” Skylar says more of a question for clarification.   
“And you're fucking Gallagher.”   
“I am not fucking Anyone. Christ. Why do you care?”   
Jeremy leans over the desk and smiles and it's a creepy as fuck smile. He reaches out and grabs Akylars shirt and pulls him close.   
“You shouldn't be fucking him. You should be fucking me.”   
Skylar doesn't have time to react before Jeremy is roughly kissing him and Skylars eyes widen and he pushes Jeremy roughly backwards.   
“The fuck?!?”   
“What…not good enough for you? Not what you like?!?!”   
“Wait..you're fucking gay!?!” Skylar screams in disbelief.   
“No. I'm not gay and if you ever repeat that….”   
“I ain't repeating shit. I am however leaving.” Skylar says and he's pulled back roughly.   
Jeremy slips however and Skylar crashes roughly down onto the side of the desk, banging the back of his head against it.   
“Fucking damn it. Jeremy, sleep it the fuck off.” He brings out angrily, but Jeremy kisses him roughly again. Holding Skylar roughly against the desk, pulling at his shirt and going for Skylars jeans. Skylar panics for a second and swiftly kicks backwards warning him a punch in the jaw. But Jeremy falls to the ground when Skylar punches him back.

 _“Listen here you piece of shit! You go around for months saying Ian is taking advantage of me, that he's a creep pedo, and what the fuck are you?! You just tried to rape me you fuck!! You stay away from me okay!! Or I will tell the whole world that you’re a sick sadistic bastard! Being gay is not a problem, being whatever you are is!! Sleep it the fuck off, and if you touch me one more time, ever! I will tell Ian and ask him to round up every south side thug he knows and rip your dick off.”_  
\--

“Woah…” Ian says leaning against the wall.   
“I should of said something when you…I was going to tell you…but you disappeared, and I just…”  
“Has he ever touched you again?” Ian asks the anger rising in his eyes scares Skylar.   
“No. I honestly didn't think he remembered it.”  
“So that fuck, drugged me, for what? Because he thought you wanted me over him? And I'm the sicko? Oh yeah, fucking okay.”   
Ian swings the door open.   
“Ian!!! Don't…please.”   
“Sky…you can't let him get away with this shit!”   
“I can handle my own battles.”   
“This isn't your battle sky. This is mine too. It's bad enough that he tried what he did with you and then what he did to me…sick mother…ill kill him.”

Just then he made it to the office. When he saw Jeremy his eyes didn't see anything else. They zeroed in on him. “You!!” He yells.   
He picks Jeremy up by his shirt.

“The fuck…psycho…” Jeremy stammers out.   
“Ian!!!” Mickey says and looks over at Skylar who looks down. “Sky…do I want to stop him?” He asks and Skylar shrugs.  
“Yes and no”   
Just the. Francis and Preston come out of he office.   
“Gallagher!! What are you doing? Put him down!! I'll call security.”   
“Call an ambulance instead. Because I'm gonna hurt him, really fucking bad.”   
“Why? Because he told your secret?” Preston asks angrily.   
Ian laughs almost manically and Mickey snaps into action. He places his hands on Ian.   
“Baby…let him down. Talk to me okay…”   
“This…psychotic mother fucker, told Preston he caught me and Skylar fucking….” Ian growled out.   
“Excuse me?” Mickey asks.   
“You did what to my son!?!” Francis glares.   
“I didn't touch him, did I Jeremy? I wasn't the one who touched him!!! You sick fuck! Didn't want to take no for an answer huh? So you what? Got pissed because he didn't want you! Thought what?! That he wanted me so you had to stop it? By what? Trying to fuck him? Drugging me, showing him how weak I was. What? I would really like to know? Because you are a discussing asshole!! He was a kid!!! He was a fucking kid!!!!” By now Ian is wrapping his hands tighter around Jeremy's neck and Preston gasps.

“Sky?” Preston asks.   
“Ian and I never….he never touched me.” Skylar says.   
It seems to be the answer he needs. Because Ian is pushed off of Jeremy and Preston punches his friend in the jaw.   
“What did you do to my brother?!??! You mother fucker!! You try to rape my brother? You drug me? Drug Ian? The fuck asshole. We've been friends for how long? Did you sit around fantasizing about my baby brother the whole time? You are disgusting.” He punches him again.

“Jeremy…you are fucking fired. Skylar, Preston and Ian, in my office now! Mickey would you kindly take out the trash.” He says nodding towards Jeremy.   
“My fucking pleasure.” Mickey says smiling mincingly at Jeremy. He grabs the back of Jeremy's shirt and laughs at the blood dripping from him and the redness around his neck.

“You think that was bad…let me introduce you to how milkoviches take care of sick fucks like you.”

 

 


	17. Resolutions and new jobs

Chapter 17: resolutions and new jobs

“Is someone going to explain to me what I just witnessed?” Francis asked.

  
“Dad…lets just…not…” Skylar starts.

>   
> “Skylar daniel lyon…why didn't you tell me? I've had that asshole working here this whole time, he's been at family dinners, he's been…near you…and I never knew he hurt you…” Francis said sadly and Ian looks at him and sees something he never paid much attention to. This was a father that desperately wanted to protect his son, not out of obligation or because he was getting something out of it, despite the mans views on his sons sexuality, he still just wanted to love him.

“Tell you so that you could tell me I deserved it? Because that's what you practically said. That me being who I was, was asking for trouble.”

  
Francis sighs loudly and hangs his head, looking tired. “That's not what I meant. I would have protected you. You didn't deserve that, the only person deserving what is coming to him would be Jeremy.”

  
Just then Mickey opens the door and peaks his head in.

  
“No blood dripping from your hands. He still living then?” Ian asks.

  
“Hm. Yeah. Washed the blood off though. But he's still breathing. Not moving so well, but I didn't kill him. I ain't going back to jail.” 

“And if he presses charges?” Preston asks quietly. 

“Then Mickey didn't touch him. It was me.” Ian says. “Head injury got him confused.”   
Preston chuckles for a minute. “Yeah okay.”   
The room grows silent looking at Skylar. “I don't want to talk about this anymore. Okay?” He says and gets up walking out. 

“I got it.” Mickey says and follows him. 

\--

“I didn't mean what I said to him, it's just. Him being gay it scared me. Not because I care who he's dating, but what if someone were to hurt him, I've seen things, it terrifies me.” Francis says to Ian and Preston and Ian nods.

 

“Yeah, but that's just it. It's either hide and be miserable because this…feeling the way we feel isn't a choice. You think that I wouldn't have chosen to like girls? I would have. And Mickey? He would have killed to like chicks as much as his brothers did, pure survival right there but here we are. Granted if given the choice now I would chose gay because I love that man, but that's different. As a teenager, what kind of person chooses for the things that we had to live through.”  
Francis nods. “I know. I know. I just don't know how to fix what I broke years ago.”

“Hey kid…calm down.”  
“He's just so….acting like he wouldn't have been laughing about it. I got what I deserved is what he would say. Because I'm gay, like I fucking chose this, and maybe I did deserve it.”  
“Oh yeah? So being gay makes you deserve horrible things huh?”  
“Mick…”  
“No, no. So what about me huh? I deserve to get punched by my own father? Your dad said some words okay…my dad…he snapped, attacked me and my boyfriend and could have killed us, and at the time that would have been better because what we got instead was my being forced to fuck a prostitute while my father held a gun to my head and made Ian watch it. So all in all kid, I think you got it pretty good.”   
“That..that's fucked up.” Skylar said.   
“Mhm. Want better. Had to marry her too…when she popped up pregnant.” Skylars eyes widen.   
“What the..”  
“Southside man. Just..it looks like your old man is trying okay? Trying to understand. So let him try.” Skylar seems to think this over before nodding.   
\--  
When Skylar gets home that night, Preston is sitting in the couch waiting for him. He is staring off into space and is seemingly in his own world. “Pres?” Skylar asks. Nothing. The cold eyes of his brother staring at the wall. “Preston!” Skylar says again. He Doesn't respond again. So Skylar steps out and calls Ian.   
“Hey bud. How's home? Everything okay?” Ian asks

“No…um…it's Preston. He's not responding. I need your help.” He says.

“Okay okay. We'll be right over.” Ian says into the phone  
\--

“Okay. Anything yet?” Ian asks, Mickey at his side  
“He nodded at me but he just went back to staring at the damn wall. What is wrong with him?” Skylar asks.  
“Shock…guilt..just stay here. I got this.” Ian says. Ian walks over, calls out to Preston a few times and leans down in front of him. He stares into the empty eyes looking back at him. He knows Preston sees him. “Preston…come on man. Sky is worried. Hmm. Ill Let you hit me.” He tries, prestons eyes move but he doesn't. “I'll let you ask me anything. And I won't even get offended. Come on Preston.”

“Why?” The man whispers.

“Why what?” Ian asks. Expecting a, why are you gay, why is anyone? Anything but what he asks.

“Why…would he…my brother…anyone but my baby brother…why…” He says and Ian understands.

  
"Hey, there are a lot of sick fucks out there, and we don't always see them so easily. We would like to think so, yeah? Like you can just spot these people on the street, the people that take advantage of other people, or those who torture people because of whatever reason, but it isnt that easy. If it was, we would avoid them. You're brother is okay...Yeah? He survived the bullshit that others put him through, just as much as the rest of us have. but he's okay, you're okay, I'm okay, we're all fucking okay. Time to be more than okay though huh? You gotta snap out of it and look over at your brother, you're brother is worried about you, he loves you." Ian says softly, trying to get through.

"No...I told him, what he was...was sick...why did i say that? It's not, I never...I never thought that. I didn't want anyone to hurt him, but I did, and My best friend did, and you didn't and we all treated you like you were this horrible person.. That would...I'm so sorry." He says.

"Hey..." Mickey says from behind them and preston actually looks over at him. "Sometimes, shit happens man...alright..I did some shit, okay? some really bad shit, and this one forgave me, your brother is right here, man, just look at him, and talk to him." Mickey says and preston sighs.

"Bet you never did what I did, said the things I said." He says, so sure of himself.

"Oh yeah? I was...Raised by a crazy son of a bitch man, like fag-bashing, crazy son of a bitch, who not only beat the shit of out of us for a good majority of our lives, but who absolutely flipped shit when he walked in on his son, fucking some tall ginger mother fucker...or getting fucked...whatever. after that...after what he fucking did because of that...I shut everything out, I said somethings, that were…cruel, I beat the shit out of the only man I ever loved it ever will love, all because he wanted me to be honest. To admit that I was gay, and I was in love with a man. Then I turned around and turned my back on him and my love for him and for what? To make my dad happy? The man that held me at gunpoint…and was forcing me to…anyway. Look man internalized homophobia is just as bad as outright homophobia sometimes, so yeah you want to be a piece of shut for the rest of your life. Okay. Or do you want to be better than that prick of a best friend of yours and get your brother back. Your brother bei is waiting for you.” Mickey breathes out as he finishes and Ian just stares at him for a minute in awe. “Ian, don't.” Mickey says laughing.

“What? I was just gonna..”

“I know. You were gonna make some love filled dopey comment about what I just said. It's not the time. I love you too. We will deal with your romantic sappy side later.” Mickey days and Ian smiles and nods.

“You two know eachother that well?” Skylar asks from behind them.

“We been doin this a long time man. You learn things. He's the sappy, love sick, bad ass. And I am the temperamental, angry, act before I think about it, asshole.” Mickey says

“With a heart of gold.” Ian adds and Mickey flips him off.   
  
“I'm sorry.” Preston says.   
“I think it's time we go. I think the brothers need to talk.” Ian says grabbing mickeys hand who nods in agreeance.   
“I think you're right. I'm ready for those sappy love declarations that lead to sex.” Mickey laughs.   
\--  
Back at Mickey's apartment, he wraps his arms around his boyfriend. "You know, I think me having to work at this place was actually a good thing."   
"You think so?" Ian asks   
"Yes. If I hadn't, you wouldn't know everything you do now, and maybe you can get past, or let go of that shit." Mickey says smiling  
"Mhm. and what about our past. You gonna move past that?" Ian asks.   
"Like, the fucked up shit people did to us, or the shit we did to eachother?" mickey asks to clarify.   
"What we did to eachother. I know we're back together, but can we ever really just let that go?"   
"I can. In fact, to show you just how much, I have moved on....Come here." Mickey's eyes twinkle in a way that Ian knows exactly what he's getting at and he smiles.   
They kiss deeply. "Mhm, I like this moving on thing, lets try it agian." Ian says.   
"and you know, if you arent really sure. You could just...move in with me, officially." Mickey says   
"What?" Ian asks tilting his head.   
"Don't what me. What do you say. Me and you, you never leave anymore anyway. When is the last time you stayed at your apartment with my sister? huh? Why not just move all your shit in." Mickey says and Ian smiles.   
"Okay." Ian replies  
"Okay." Mickey says and pulls on his boyfriend's shirt.   
"Now let me show you what a great boyfriend..Slash...Roomate I can be." and he raises his eyebrows and Ian willingly follows him.   
\--

The next day Mickey was once again called into Francis’ office and he sighed. He wondered what it could be now. He hadn't been late or anything work related. So it had to be personal. The man obviously had no professionalism when it came to his family. Separating buisness and personal shit was obviously not important.

“Mickey.” Francis said sounding professional. Well that was new, kind of.

“Yes, sir. You wanted to see me?” He asks.   
“Yes. It seems that this will be your last week with us.” He says.   
“Am I fired? For what reason?” Mickey asks glaring slightly. And Francis chuckles.   
“Fired? Oh lord no. Your job is ready with Alan. I trust that a week is enough time for you to finish up any work I currently had already assigned you.” He says and Mickey nods.   
“Yes. Yes. Of course.” He says.   
“You thought I was firing you? Why?” The man asks curiously.   
“Honestly?” Mickey asks and Francis urges him on. “With everything going on around here, I honestly don't know what to think anymore.”  
“I see. Well, I'm sorry for that. I understand, finding out about you and Ian was a shock and I might have reacted in less than a professional way. I'm told I do that when it concerns my family. I am sorry about that as I am sorry about the past indiscretions of my former employees and family friends. I was wrong about your boyfriend then and my initial assumptions about you as well. I am man enough to admit that. You have been nothing but kind to my son, and I respect that, and as I understand you have a little something to do with his willingness to talk to me. So thank you for that.”

“It wasn't exactly for you. While I think your beliefs about my lifestyle are absurd and irrational, your form of homophobia or lack of understanding are far more tame than that of my own father and I can see that you want to try with your son, and that is something far more than I would have ever gotten from my own father and I wanted Skylar to know that it could be worse. You should know that what he feels isn't easy to deal with and having family by your side in that can help a great deal.” Mickey says calmly.   
“Yes, I understand. That my views over the years have hurt my son more than helped him. I see that now, I never wanted him to feel like who he decides to love eventually would make me anything less than proud of him. You see, I've seen things in my very long life, and that terrifies me, I don't know how your father reacted to your being gay, but I've seen some people's reactions that were more than terrifying and I love my children, all of them. Regardless of such things.” He says.   
“Well that's good to hear. Skylar is a great kid and he doesn't deserve to deal with what I have or Ian has. And if anyone even tries to harm him we will be there to back him up. He's a friend. And understand that if some pruny old queen tries anything with him, as you though Ian was, I'll castrate them myself. I couldn't stop what Ian went through back then, but I'll be damned if I stand by and let anyone do that shit to another person if I can help it.”

“I respect that.”   
\--

“Hey.” Ian says wrapping his arms around mickey. “I hear there's going to be a party.” Ian says smiling.

“What? Ian…no parties…it's a job change Jesus.” Mickey whines and Ian laughs.   
“M’not throwing it. Office thing. Think it was Skylars idea. A going away party for Mickey Milkovich, who knew, don't they usually atleast wait until your gone to celebrate your absence.  
“Ay, fuck You.” Mickey says flipping his boyfriend off.

“With fucking pleasure.” Ian says pulling Mickey into an intense kiss.   
\--

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come see me on tumblr, @mysticallygallavich.


	18. Who is that?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skylar gets a savior in an unexpected place. Mickey makes a decision about his future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here is an update. Hope you like it. :)

18:   
\--   
Skylar was at the bar waiting on his family and co-workers when he saw him, more like was being held fucking hostiage by Jeremy. He was backed up against the wall in the far corner and there he was, drunk off his fucking ass. Skylar could tell because his breath was horrific. and he had both of his arms on the sides of skylars face, anger raged in his eyes and Skylar could honestly say he was terrified. What would he do? How could he get out of this as fast as he could with as little damage as possible. He was wondering where his family was, where were Ian and Mickey, he would settle for anybody right now, any...fucking...body... 

“Jeremy…I…what do you want!” He asks loud enough. Somebody had to hear right? It wasn't like this was the office, this was a bar. 

“You…why would you tell them about me…I lost everything….I protected you,” Jeremy slurred out and Skylar shuttered, but before he could say anything Jeremy grabs his arm roughly and pulls him closer, and Skylar yelps out. 

“Please, leave me alone.” Skylar shakes a little and closes his eyes, waiting for what comes next, and when nothing does he opens one eye, and Jeremy is being held back by two strong arms. Who looks a little rough around the edges but sexy as hell.

“This dickhead bothering you?” The man asks and without hesitation Skylar nods . The man tightens his grip on Jeremy. “I think you owe the boy an apology. 

“Fuck you man.” Jeremy bites out and receives a fist to the side of his face. 

“Now fuckhead. I believe I said to apologize. I don't take too kindly to assholes who try to take advantage of men who are obviously not interested in what they're selling.”

“Fine. Sorry.” Jeremy says in almost a whisper. 

“I don't think he heard you? Did you hear him?” The man looks up at Skylar and smiles, this bright and unthreatening smile. Which is odd considering. 

“Mm, don't think so.” Skylar says chuckling. 

“Sorry! Fuck.” Jeremy let's out. 

“Good. Now get the fuck outta here.” The man says and Jeremy's gone. And the man flashes a smile before he turns to walk away. 

“Hey. Thanks.” Skylar calls and the man is gone. Skylar can't help but be dissapointed that the stranger is gone as fast as he came. 

\--  
“I mean, who the fuck was he?” Skylar says to Ian and Mickey as they are having a drink before heading home. Farewell party was boring as fuck.

“Was he hot?” Ian asks tilting his head and Mickey glares at him. Ian holds up a finger to his lips to shush his boyfriend. He would deal with hot sexy his jealousy was later.

“Oh my god ye…wait what?” Skylar catches himself and Ian smirks, and Mickey catches on to ians game. 

“You like him!” Mickey says laughing. 

“I do not. I don't even know him. He just like appeared and then he was gone. My fucking luck.” Skylar sighs. 

“He's got it bad huh?” Ian laughs. And Skylar flips him off.   
“Whatever. You guys suck.” He says. 

“Yes we do. Besides the fucking point.” Mickey jokes and Skylar rolls his eyes. 

\--  
"Last day huh, How is that going?" Preston asks from the the side of the desk and mickey looks up and shrugs. 

"All good man, what are you doing here?" Mickey asks stiffly.   
"Trying to convince my little brother to let me take him out to lunch."   
"Thought you guys were doing better?" Mickey asks.   
"In theory, yes. It's just a matter of convincing him that It'll still be okay, if and when he finds someone. He thinks being okay with his sexuality is fine in theory, but I'll freak out when its in practice."   
"And will you?" Mickey asks, a little protective. So what, he liked the kid, he wanted him to be okay when he was gone.   
"Of course. He's my brother. I love him, I don't care who he fucks."   
"That wasn't always the case, was it?"   
"It wasn't about him being gay, it was about creepy guys taking advantage of him. He's sheltered as fuck, he still doesn't even know how cruel people can be." He says sadly  
"Maybe not. let me give you a little advice. Pushing him away, and telling him who and what he can do, isn't going to help him. Trust me. I've seen that shit happen."   
"Really?" Preston rolls his eyes from the lecture.   
"yeah. Ask Ian, how well he takes when his well intentioned family tries to tell him how to live? or let me explain to you how my very passionate and overprotective sister almost ruined their friendship by overstepping. You have to find a middle ground and let the kid live. He's gonna find someone eventually, the best way to show him that his sexuality doesn't mean shit, when he finds someone, you give the asshole a chance." Mickey says.   
"And what if the guy's a dick, and hurts my brother? I just let it happen?" Preston asks, and Mickey can tell it is really hard for him to ask something like that.   
"Didn't say that. You play nice, you observe, and instead of acting, you fucking think first, come to me or Ian, we'll take a look. That way when you try to do something stupid that will make your brother hate you, atleast you'll have backup, shit man. No matter what you say, he's gonna think its because your a homophobic prick, be smart dumbass." and Preston chuckles and nods. 

"Alright, alright. I get it." 

"Speaking of getting in on your brothers good graces, I have something to ask you." Mickey says.   
\--   
Weeks pass and Mickey has decided he loves his new job. Working at this company and watching these artists work, and that's what they were, it was hard not to see it, how much time and energy went into doing these things. Even a few of the guys taught him some new tricks and he had a book filled with drawings of his own, and it was amazing. This was perfect, everything was really. 

Alan walks in and everyone of course tries to look more busy than they actually are, that makes Mickey roll his eyes, it wasn't as if they weren't working before, but they were probably getting less done acting like that, fake busing themselves, he didn''t really see a point in that, so he nodded at his boss and put his head back down, going back to exactly what he had been doing before, which was boring ass paperwork, but hey, it was a job and it was amazing being around this environment. 

"Hey kid, How you doing with this?" Alan asks smiling, and sitting down across the desk from mickey. 

"Good, it's amazing around here, Learning a lot of coolestpeople thing person to talk the talk page for me I was like that it would have a nice dream about of my friends to be able and willing the first place I don’t have the right way too long and I love the fact techniques while still mindlessly getting all of this fantastic paperwork done." He says. 

"Interesting. Boring job, but you like the surroundings." He says thoughtfully, and Mickey looks up at him and eyes him. Ian had told him about this. When Alan Greene has an idea, or something that he things would be a good idea, he kind of toys with it for a while before deciding, whatever the man was thinking, Mickey was sure he didn't want to know right at this moment, and he was sure that Alan was not going to tell him quite yet because a second later he was out of his view and walking back into his rather large office. Mickey wondered for a second what that was about before he went back to work, completly forgetting about the conversation. 

\--

Skylar sits in the large chair in the living room across from his brother. The brother who he once looked up to so many years ago and wondering when that all changed. When had it become so awkward to be in he same room with him. He knew the answer of course but to was hard to stomach. As many times as Preston explained his own actions, he didn't know if the feeling of losing his brother would ever change inside of him. 

“Sky…” Preston starts, he looks tired, worn down. And Skylar shakes his head. 

“Pres, I know you just want to make it better but I don't know how you can okay. I'm sorry, but it's just words to me.” Skylar says sadly. 

“I know, but listen. I need you to understand me. It was never about not accepting you, or your sexuality. I was just terrified someone would hurt you, like…look, I…saw it. Okay. What people do, how they take advantage. I didn't want it to happen to you. And yes I was wrong, I assumed that Ian was this horrible person, and I was too blind to see that my own friend was the creep preying on innocent people.” Preston says, he looks almost broken. And Skylar wants to hug him because he's family but he doesn't. 

“What do you mean you saw it?” Skylar asks instead. 

“You remember Bo.” He says and Skylar looks up. 

“Bo? What about him?” 

“Did you know he was gay? Because I didn't. He was your best friend when you were kids, you know? And I really never knew he was…did you?” Preston asks and Skylar shakes his head. How would he know, he hadn't seen him since he was fifteen. 

“How do you know that? He moved away before I even…before you knew I was gay.” He says.   
“I know, but I ran into him, a couple of months before Ian started working for us. He was…in pretty bad shape, man. Like really bad. Told me he was gay, that he had been hurt, got mixed up with some older guys, and…he didn't tell me the whole story, but it broke my heart, okay. He told me a story about this guy being all sweet and nice and amazing and using him and throwing him away, abusin him. And all I thought about when he said that was you, because I knew even then that you were gay. I was terrified. But I told myself you'd never be into an older guy, that it would be fine. Then Ian, you were so into him man, I saw it and it's all I saw.” 

“So you judged Ian because you were afraid he would be like the men who hurt bo? Why didn't you just tell me that then? Maybe even just talk to Ian. He isn't like that. He's been that guy ya know? Let older men use him, when he was young and when he was sick, he wouldn't. And yeah I had a crush, because look at him, he's a good looking guy. But I always knew his heart slinger to Mickey. Even then he talked about him all the time. How he'd been in love with him since he was my age. We talked about what it was like coming out. Not one of our conversations were inappropriate. I never hit on him, he never hit on me.” Preston nods at that.

“I know. I never meant to hurt you. Or Ian. I don't know what happened that night and I'll never forgive myself for being that guy. I want you to know. I accept you for who you are. I'm so sorry I hurt you.” 

\--

It's a few days later when Alan comes up to Mickey again, Mickey was in the middle of drawing up some bullshit designs that were in his head, he wasn't on the clock yet, he was just messing around and Alan greene stopped to look over his shoulder and he seemed to be contemplating something. Mickey wondered what that was about, it seemed like the mans mind was always running. 

"What?" Mickey asked not being able to help himself, not being able to hold himself back, he was never really good at that. 

"Hmm, most people know better than to talk to me like that, not you. always speakin your mind huh?" mickey nods at that, he knew that it would bite him in the ass eventually, usually did. 

"I like that, mostly. Watch it around here though. You ever think about going back to school?" thhe man asks and there it was, mickey sighed, he hated that question. 

"Not really, what would I do that for?" Mickey says more harshly than he really means too. 

"Woah, cujo, calm down, just a question. Seems to me, that dropping out of school, was probably the best decision for you at the time, am I right? Not really into it, thought you'd be in and out of prison anyway, whats the point right? I get that, but it seems to me, for someone who was going nowhere in his life at one point, things might have changed. That maybe you found something that you like doin, that you could do more of and get paid for it, with a little school to back it up. and it seems that you have someone that will adore you no matter what you do, seems to me you'd like to make him proud. like he makes you. huh?" Alan says and walks away. and Mickey stares at the dude. 

That night in the middle of dinner, he cant stop thinking about it, as Ian smiles at him, he just can't stop thinking about the words that Alan had spoken to him earlier. "Figured out what Mr.Greene wanted. You know, what he was being all weird about." He says. 

"Oh yeah? whats that?" ian says, not the least bit worried, he had known Alan for a long time now and usually whatever he was up to, usually worked out just fine. 

"wants me to go back to school." and Ian starts coughing, eyes wide. Fuck. Mickey was going to freak out, he was going to flip his shit if he thought for one second that Ian had anything to do with this, and he didn't...or he didn't actually mean to, he had mentioned Mickey's passion for architecture but had promptly dropped the subject when Alan had talked about the typical qualifications for being a certified architect. There was no way in hell he was going to ask mickey to go back to school. He didn't feel like getting punched in the face. 

"Oh? and is he still breathing?" Ian half jokes. 

"I didn't hit him Ian." Mickey says rolling his eyes. 

"Hey its a logical question. You would have punched me if i suggested such shit." ian says and Mickey nods. Probably true. Which is why it crossed his mind just then. 

"Did you say something to him? convince him to ask me that?" Mickey asks. 

"mm no."   
"ian....Don't lie to me. I'm not good enough for you anymore, want me to be some big shot? that it? so you asks our boss to talk to me, it's different coming from him or some shit." 

"Mickey, no, god no. I didn't do that, i would never. Look. When you draw and look at your work, you get this look, it's kind of like I get when I work, or even more so, how I used to get about the army okay? I did not ask him to talk to you, I asked him the qualifications, is all. He listed off the typical shit he usually requires from his architects, and the conversation was over. I did not mention it to you, because why would I? you would freak out, and if you are happy doing what you''re doing now, who am i to judge? i have to take how many pills every morning just so that I don't go off the deep end. I sit in an office all day, never would have thought i would like that, but I do." 

"But you think I should...Go back?" Mickey asks. 

"Do I think you should...that's up to you, do I think that you should want better, yes, because you fucking deserve it. If you love it as much as I think you do, then yes, you should do anything and everything you can to get what you want, but it is a requirement for me to love you, to be proud of you, hell no. as long as you walk in that door at night, and you still love me, then I don't care what job you have." Mickey smiles at him lightly. "Unless it's prostitution, I got a problem with that shit. Nobody touches what's mine." Ian jokes and Mickey rolls his eyes and pulls him close. 

==  
Ian walks in, to hang out with Mandy and spots her and jazz hanging out on the couch looking like two girls who had been friends for years, not only a short time, and he smiles. Mandy needs this. Needs something other than Ian and his shit to focus on which she has been doing so long. 

“Ian! Hey.” Jazz says looking up and then she jumps up and bounds into his arms as if it was a normal thing for her to do. Which it wasn’t at all. 

“Mandy….Did you drug her?” He asks laughing and gets a punch on the arm. “That’s more like it.” He says laughing as both girls flip him off. 

“ANNNYWay…What are you doing here? Isn’t it like your day off? Don’t you spend it locked in that apartment, with my brother?” she asks and smiles to show she doesn’t really care. 

“First of all he’s working. Second of all, I was coming to see my best friend. But since you’re busy.” He says starting to back up jokingly. 

“Get your ass on this couch!” Mandy exclaims, so he laughs as he makes his way to his best friend and jazz. It was going to be an interesting day. 

 

Mickey called when he got off work because his apartment was empty and that was unusual these days, his boyfriend just imformed him that he was hanging out with mandy and to come on over, so of course, as tired as he was, he really needed to see ian before he collapsed into his bed, so he made his way over there. Walking in like he owned the place of course. And he found his sister sitting in a chair, giggling, Jasmine laying across ian and his boyfriend was shaking his head. 

“Okay so, when you saw him again, for the first time…you like grab him and just fuck him or what? Because I fucking would have, look at the man.” She says and Ian laughs. 

“I don’t wanna hear this!!!!” Mandy says.   
“Of course I didn’t. Not that I didn’t want to, I’ve wanted to possibly every second of every day since I was like fifteen, but I fucked up, so he would have killed me, and in turn, I wouldn’t beable to fuck anyone ever again. Let me tell you….fucking that man…” 

“Okay firecrotch, I think that’s enough.” Mickey said shaking his head in a little bit of laughter. And Ian just looks up at him and smiles. Noticing that mickey is slightly embarrassed. 

“Mandy close your eyes.” Ian says to her and she glares at him. But jazz moves off of him and he pulls mickey down to the couch with him. “I don’t think it’s enough at all.” Ian says smiling and kisses Mickey. 

“damn.” Jasmine fans her face. “Lucky bastards I tell you. They’re both sexy as hell and they have eachother. Fucking gay men have all the luck.” She says laughing. 

“That’s enough.” Mickey says and ian just laughs snaking himself around his boyfriend. “You’re an asshole.” 

“But you love me?” Ian says playfuly.   
“Yeah Yeah, not like I ever had a choice in the matter.” Mickey says and displays a light smile at his boyfriend. 

 

“Hey son.” Skylar looks up to see his father standing over the chair. 

“Hey dad.” He says softly. 

“Um…We’re having a family dinner…um, next week. If you would like to invite your friends, or even…a date, we would be happy to have them join us.” He says grunting through his teeth a little but Skylar still smiled because he was trying. His dad was trying and he thought about things that mickey had said to him before, about how his father had reacted versus how Mickey’s father had reacted and he had to admit, a father trying to understand was a hell of a lot better than the horror show that Mickey and Ian had gone through so he just smiles at his father and nods. 

“I’ll ask them. Don’t think I’ll have a date or whatever, but I’ll ask ian and mick.” He says. 

“No date? Why not? You’re a nice looking man, I’m sure men whom have the same interests as you would be extremely interested.” His father tries and skylar laughs. 

“No luck so far, however even if by a miracle I met someone today, I highly doubt id be inviting them to a family dinner that soon anyway. Dad, how would you feel if you went on a date with a girl and she puled that?” he asks and his father contemplates. 

“Run for the hills probably.” And Sylar laughs 

“Exactly.” And they both smile at eachother. 

(A few weeks later) 

“So I made a decision.” Mickey says sitting across from Ian at a table at the bar. 

“About what?” Ian says absentmindedly, going over his work in his head. Because he cant help it. 

“About school.” Mickey says and Ian’s eyes snap up. 

“Yeah?” he asks wondering what the decision is.   
“I’m gonna do it. Go back and do this. I mean. It will be a lot and we…just got back to us not long ago, but I think it’s what I want to do.” Mickey says and Ian forgets where they are for a minute, he just gets up and wraps his arms around his boyfriend.   
“Im so proud of you. I will do whatever you need. God I love you.” He says excidedly and Mickey chuckles. 

“Love you too dumbass.” Mickey shakes his head and smiles brightly, and kisses Ian lightly. And then they hear someone clearing their throat and Mickey turns to the tall and built man staring at them. 

“Got a problem?” Ian says looking at him. 

“Not exactly. You two are friends with…that one kid right?” he asks kind of softly and mickey raises his eyebrows. 

“That one kid? You got a name?” mickey says shaking his head. 

“ummm. Just…is he okay?” the man asks and Ian sees something in his eyes that speaks and he calms him down. When he first walked up he thought he was just some jerk about too comment on his love life but he looked genuenly concerned about skylar. 

“You know sky?” Ian asks softly and the man looks away. 

“No, no of course not, just…he was in here…and yeah.” 

“You saved him.” Mickey says knowinly. This was the guy and honestly he could see the appeal. He wasn’t bad looking. 

“um, no not really, just helped out is all. I should go, just wanted to…check. Seemed shaken up is all.” The man says and mickey shakes his head. 

“Uh huh. Sure yeah, he’s okay. You got name shack?” he says to the man who just eyes him.   
“Not important.” 

“Uh huh. Likes his mystery. You’re loss. Don’t want to talk to sky…can’t tell him who’s askin if I don’t know. “  
“maybe I don’t want him to know.” He says.   
“Maybe you’re an idiot.” Ian says. And the man just stares for a minute. “you gonna go run and hide now?” 

“I don’t hide.” He says. 

“you.” They all hear the voice behind them and the man turns, face to face with skylar and preston. Preston’s eyes widen but he just looks at the group. 

“I thought I’d never see you again.” Skylar says. And the man smiles a little bit and ian leans out and sees it and Preston quirks an eyebrow. Ian looks at preston then to judge if he was about to freak out at Skylar’s new obvious crush. Perfect way to judge if he really was just a concerned brother, and not a homophobic prick that Ian had always believed him to be. 

“What are you doing here?” Preston says but there’s no bark, no bite, just worry. 

“was in town, for a bit.” The man says and it’s obvious they know eachother. 

“You…You know my brother?” Skylar asks his mystery guy. 

“Sky…that’s Bo.” Preston says confused. “Seriously?” he says looking at Bo but he shrugs. 

 

“So the fucker has a name then,” Mickey says with a smirk and a smile and Skylar just turns to eye the man closely. Could it be? Could it be him….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MysticallyGallavich (TUMBLR)


	19. How it ends.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final Chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg. I'm so sorry it took so long. I have a horrible time writing endings to multi's. I don't like saying goodbye I guess. Anyway here it is. The final chapter of this one. :)

Chapter 19:  FINAL CHAPTER

 

(One year later)

 

Mickey walked into the apartment and collapsed on the couch.  School was fucking exausting, even more so than work, and doing both at the same time, fucking hell.  But what made it all worth it?  Well as Ian walked out of the bedroom in just a towel, there it was. Everything that made it all worth it was standing there.

 

"How was school?" Ian asks.

 

"Draining man."  He answers.   and Ian makes his way to mickey and places his hands on his shoulders rubbing them and smiling.   "Mmmm, that's better."  he says and he flips around grabbing Ian's towel and pulling it off of him.  "and now it's perfect.  want you."

 

"Are you sure? It's been a long day." Ian says.

 

"You haven't been inside of me in....three days and four hours."  Mickey says.

 

"Been counting?" Ian asks. 

 

"Every fucking second, now get on me. Fucking now." and Ian isn't one to tell his boyfriend now,, so he starts to strip Mickey out of his clothes as fast as he can. 

 

"Yes. Sir." He says and smirks peppering kisses all over Mickey's face and down his neck and pushing him down on the couch.

 

\--------

(2 years later)

 

 

“Sky is coming over for dinner tomorrow still?” Ian asks as they lie in bed next to each other.

 

“Yeah, he’s bringing company.” Mickey says chuckling.

 

“Oh god, please tell me it’s not enough douchebag, I swear, I can’t handle anymore of them.” Ian says groaning.

 

“Nah, he’s bringing Bo this time.” Mickey says and Ian nods.

 

“they still in the ‘I love him’ but Im busy fucking other people shit?” and Mickey laughs.

 

“We have no room to judge.  And I don’t know, didn’t ask. “ Mickey says shrugging.  “You know Sky would be all over that shit, but Bo is all, you need more experience, blah.  Just let them figure it out on their own Ian. Until then, why don’t you get on me, and show me some love.”  Ian chuckles.

 

“Do you know how proud I am of you.” Ian says kissing Mickey’s neck.  “Mr.Architect.” He says in a low and deep voice sending shivers down Mickey’s spine.  

 

“God, how do you do that after all this time, just by…Do you know how much I love you Ian?” He asks and Ian giggles a little wrapping his arms around Mickey and continuing his kissing down Mickey’s body.

 

“Not as much as I love you. It’s been a great few years, yeah?” Ian asks biting down on a patch of skin.

 

“Amazing. Yeah.”  Mickey moans out.

“Do you ever wish you wouldn’t have taken me back?” and Mickey stills, his whole body freezes.

“Why are you asking me that?” Mickey says his whole body tense.

“I’m not always easy to get a long with Mick, I know that. I was just curious, if you ever…like when im all crazy and shit.” He asks and Mickey knows why he’s asking. There had been a couple of times in the last few years when ian had been…manic or depressive, it came with the territory really, but they always took care of it. Always.  But he knew when Ian asked questions like this he was heading into a dangerous zone.

 

“I love you, don’t ever regret you.  Ever okay?” He says sweetly, comforting him before he raises up.  “Med check.”  Ian groans but he turns over and opens the nightstand and pulls out the bottles.  “Rundown.” He says and Ian sits up.

 

“I feel level. No nervous energy, no more than usual, no depressing thoughts, haven’t missed any does, been sleeping.” He says running down whatever his boyfriend might ask him.  “It’s not that I swear.” He says and Mickey nods satisfied and curls back up to Ian.

 

“Sorry, You know…”

 

“you have to. I know. It’s not so bad anymore. I kind of like when you go into protective mode like that now.  Like you are single handedly gonna kick my disorder’s ass. And I love you for it, so fucking much.” Ian says and Mickey smiles.

 

“Okay, so why you wondering about that shit. You know I love you. Me and You, this shit is good, like forever kinda good yeah?” Mickey asks.

 

“Mhm.” Ian says shyly.  Mickey moves to straddle Ian. 

 

“What’s that, you shy now?  What’s going on baby?” he says it and there it fucking is, everything he wants to hold in, he can’t anymore.

 

  
“Marry me?” He says suddenly and Mickey tilts his head at him. He doesn’t freeze and he doesn’t seem to be freaking out, he’s just looking at Ian curiously.

 

“That’s why you’re freaking out?” He asks and he smiles and Ian rolls his eyes.

 

“Yes asshole. I want you to marry me.” Ian says huffing and moving to turn over but Mickey is still on top of him staring down at him.  Mickey grinds down on Ian, watching Ian’s breath hitch.  “You wanna forget I said anything.” He says and Mickey laughs a little.

 

“No, I want to ride my Fiance now.” He says simply and Ian stares up at him. 

 

 

“Wait…You’re saying yes?” He asks.

 

“Of course I’m saying yes.  I would like to point out that I expected more girly fluffy shit from the likes of you, but you have the rest of our lives to make up for that.”

 

“I was going to.  It just didn’t feel like an us thing to do. I just want to be yours, forever.” Ian says and Mickey leans in and kisses him hard.

 

\--

 

Skylar walks into the apartment with Bo trailing behind carrying beer.  

“Man after my own heart right there.” Mickey calls to Bo and Ian turns an glares at him. 

“Don’t even think about it Milkovich. I will bury you in my families back yard.” He says sweetly and Mickey chuckles.

  
“This is what happens when you agree to marry the guy. He starts planning to murder you.  I have to warn ya babe.  You ain’t gonna inherit anything worth havin’ alright?”  Ian shakes his head not even noticing the two men that are looking at the couple with their mouths agape.

 

“You two  are…wait what?” Skylar says. And Mickey turns to him squinting his eyes. “Getting fucking married?” he says and Mickey shrugs. 

 

“Yeah I mean, why the fuck not.  Not like im going anywhere. I mean the sex…” Mickey jokes and Ian rolls his eyes.

 

“You sure you want to marry him Ian? I could take him off your hands.” Bo jokes and Ian flips him off.

 

“Why do we hang out with this goon?” Ian asks laughing.   Bo was always making comments like that, and at first, Ian had been deeply concerned about it, that was until he saw how much Bo really cared for Sky, or how unaffected Mickey seemed to be, and there was that one drunken conversation in which Bo admitted to Ian that he would never touch Mickey, and he was too in love with Skylar.

 

“Because you adore me.”  He smiles and skylar laughs. “Or because you love Sky, and he adores me, Not really sure.”    Bo shrugs handing beers around before going into the kitchen. Ian looks over at Sky who just shakes his head and moves to the couch.

 

“You good.” Ian asks and Sky nods.

 

“I have accepted that we’re friends, that’s all we’re going to be. Im not going to let the fact that I can’t breathe without him ruin this friendship that I missed so  much while he was gone.”  he says.

 

\--

 

“You’re a dumbass you know?” Mickey says after dinner when him and Bo are in the kitchen.

 

“What are you talking about?” He says.

 

“You’re in love with him, we all fucking know it but him.  He’s more than in love with you. What is your fucking deal?”

“It’s not that simple man.” Bo says.

 

“Whatever man, not trying to get in you’re shit too much, just thought you should know, the man you love is in pain because he thinks you don’t want him.  Thought you’d want to know that.  I mean I’ve been there, I hurt that red-head in there a lot when we were younger.” He says.

 

“Yeah but that’s it isn’t it.  We’re still young. And he has so much life to live.  What if he gets with me and he regrets it. And then I lose him again.”

 

“Trust me on something, the last thing you want is to miss ten years of what could have been amazing years together over some bullshit.  Sure mine was that I fucked up and went to prison, but it was still shit and I would give anything to go back and get those years back with him.  Maybe it doesn’t work out, maybe it fucking does, and you miss all that shit, for this bullshit.  You wanted him to live, he has, now stop pussying out.  Let him go, and tell him it’s never gonna happen, or fucking tell him the truth, that you love him.” Mickey says heading back into the living room with more beers. 

 

\--

 

They were all watching a movie and Skylar looked over to Mickey and Ian and smiled lightly at the pair. They were so in love and skylar loved that, that his friends could find something so beautiful and so amazing.   The phone rings and Ian looks down and smiles.  “It’s Yevgeny. Facetime, We’ll be right back.” He says and the other two nod at him. 

 

Skylar looks back to the TV but is soon destracted when he feels a hand on his, he closes his eyes to feel it for a second, he needs to, and it fucking sucks because Bo would never be his, but he wanted him to be. He wanted with Bo what Ian had with Mickey.   “What are you doing?” Skylar finally chokes out, because he can’t take it anymore.

 

“Nothing.” Bo says.

 

“Yeah, if you keep doing that I’m going to do something you don’t want me to do.” Skylar says in warning. He’s so fucking horny right now, and he’s in love with the man beside him, this was a terrible time for Bo to be any sort of affectionate.

 

“What is it that I don’t want you to do?” Bo asks.

 

“You know what?  Fuck it.” Skylar says and he moves quickly before Bo can tell him not to, before he can say that they are too young, or too good of friends, or whatever else bullshit the man could come up with, He pressed his lips to Bo’s, he knew that if Bo rejected him right now it would suck, but he was fucking done being the little bitch. He wanted him, and he had to fucking try.   He was shocked when he heard the moan escape the large man’s lips and he was more surprised when said man wrapped his arms around Skylar.

 

“Sure We’ll take you….Um, Yev, maybe later man, looks like Sky and Bo are occupied. Okay.  Have a good night alright.”   Mickey says into the phone trying not to laugh as the men separated about as fast as two teenagers getting caught. 

 

“Are they making out again?” Yev asks.  Ian looks into the phone quirking an eyebrow.

 

“Again?” he asks and Bo starts coughing. 

 

“Yevgeny!” Bo yells.

 

“What is he talking about.” Skylar asks.

 

“Nothing Man.”  Bo says holding his head.

 

“On new years, They were in the corner making out while everyone was outside.” The teenager says.

 

Skylar looks to his friend shocked.  “We were?”

 

“We were smashed okay, we kissed, said some things, not a big deal.” He says.  

 

\--

 

After hanging up the phone from their son the two older men sit on the couch watching a squirming Bo.

 

“What did we say?” skylar asks again, Bo still not answering him.

 

“I said that I loved you alright?!” Bo lets out shaking his head. “I told you I loved you, and you rambled on about todd or steve, or whoever you were banging back then.”

 

“What? I wasn’t fucking anybody…new years…oh god.” He says shaking his head.  “I wasn’t…” Skylar shakes his head. 

 

“What?” Bo asks because he needs to know.

 

“Look I was trashed, so I don’t know what I said, but I had been thinking about this asshole…Todd, pretty sure I wasn’t talking about fucking him, more like fucking him up. He’s a douchebag. I wouldn’t touch that asshole.  I fucking love you Bo.”

 

They just stare at eachother and Ian and mickey stand up once again and start walking towards the hallways.   “We’re going to bed. You know where the spare bedroom is.” Mickey says to them because of course they do.    “and seriously work you’re shit out before I kill you.”

 

When the sunshine peaked through the window in the morning.   Ian curled up with his fiancé and kissed him lightly.  “You know life couldn’t be any more perfect.” He says smiling.   When they finally make it into their living room because they were both starving, they find Bo and Skylar curled up on the couch watching some shitty tv show and lightly making out.

 

“Guess that shit worked out for them huh?” Mickey whispers.

 

“Guess so.” Ian answers.  “Anybody hungry?” He asks loud enough for the men on the couch to hear.  The sounds of humms, which he takes as a yes through kisses can be heard and he chuckles.

 

“Love you.” Mickey says kissing Ian before making his way onto the chair in the living room. 

 

“Love you.” Ian calls out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of your support and love on this and many other fics.

**Author's Note:**

> There it goes, what do you think? Is it worth a shot? I had a new idea, and this is it. Hope you like it.


End file.
